Goonerholic: Eat, Sleep, Breathe, Drink, Arsenal

Groundhog Day. FIFA Do Barca’s Tapping Up For Them

Jul 26th, 2011 by 'holic

Not for the first time, the scum at FIFA are assisting Barca with their tapping up of our captain.

Do we really have to accept this from the corrupt bastards supposedly running our beautiful game?

Two summers running. Enforce the rules or scrap them .

FIFA and Barca, we are heartily sick of you.

Posted in comment | 241 Drinks

241 Responses to “Groundhog Day. FIFA Do Barca’s Tapping Up For Them”

on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:53 pm1Lars

Now that is just taking the piss… FIFA are a joke.
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:53 pm2Lars

Oh, I was first!
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:53 pm3True Storey

A disgrace, as usual. Muppets.
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:54 pm4True Storey

Want to split a small tin of lager Lars
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:56 pm5Lars

TS, as long as “small” in this case refers to two pints I’m on
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:57 pm6True Storey

Yes, a party pack

Please open quietly if you are in a Swedish nature reserve….
on 26 Jul 2011 at 11:59 pm7True Storey

I hope Blogs is wrong. Would like our ‘Enry to hang around for a while and get some EPL experience with us. We might need him if FUFA are aiding and abetting our captain’s move to Farca
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:04 am8Lars

I am not in a nature reserve, our house is just on the edge of a forest area. There are many beer cans being opened every day along the road, so all the animals are used to hearing it. And besides, I usually only have bottled beer (except for Boddingtons and Abbot’s Ale) here so I am a quiet beer-opener anyway!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:06 am9True Storey

My apologies for the cliche Lars

Sounds lovely BTW. Do the animals prefer Boddies or Abbot’s?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:09 am10Lars

I have to admit to feeling a bit gutted about Lansbury moving to Norwich. I hope he stays.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:10 am11oldgooner

Good work with the screen dump ‘hols, the bastards were quick to remove it last year.

Cunts, Blatter and his cronies, and the Barca.

Mes que cunts.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:15 am12Trev

Hi TS, Lars – a quick, late look-in from Devon.

Belated Birthday wishes to Lars.

PHW is down here with me and things, I have to say, are a little worrying. He’s been mumbling today about having to speak, and urgently, to Ivan’s PA.

As yet he refuses to divulge, but suffice to say I have never seen him look so nervous – physically shaking at times.

He retired to bed a while ago clutching a huge whisky. He may be loosening up, to come and reveal all to me in the middle of the night. God forbid!

If there is any news I will let you know in the morning.

As for FIFA – interesting to see what they are up to, but is anyone surprised.

This is the organisation that has to cancel it’s leadership elections because thay cannot find anyone to stand who is not already known to be corrupt.

Said barred candidate is now accusing the rest of the organisation of being even more corrupt than he is.

Q: Why does anyone take any notice of anything they say or do ?

Cheers all.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:17 am13Lars

Don’t really know what the animals would prefer, but it is an interesting question I have to admit, however, to not seeing very many of them, apart from some deer there seems to be rather few of them around – although during winter time we have on a couple of occasions actually seen wolf tracks on the small road that runs through the housing area.

Anyways, really tired so I’m off to bed now. See you all tomorrow when FIFA will still be a pack of corrupt jokes.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:17 am14Trev

Sorry Old, you weren’t in when I started writing.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:17 am15Uncle Mike

Can Arsenal “secede from the union”? There may be a few other clubs willing to do it. Maybe, in 10 years’ time, FIFA will be reduced to United, Barca, Real Madrid, Bayern, Juventus and some Asian clubs.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:23 am16oldgooner

Well done ‘holic. The cum guzzlers have tugged the article again.

Proud!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:24 am17True Storey

Ah Trev, hope you’re enjoying your hols.

Ivan’s PA is, I believe, currently upside down at Lady Nina’s London residence with the American delegation having consumed a tin of Red Bull followed by a Llama Toe chaser: one part Californian, two parts bourbon and a squeeze of llama juice – with thanks to Lonestar for the recipe. I’ll send him a text that he’s urgently needed but doubt he’ll emerge from his ordeal before sunrise. Regards to PHW.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:27 am18True Storey

Yup, well spotted old and well done ‘Holic (again).

‘cum guzzlers’ – classic!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:27 am19Nick

Link no longer works, Holic. What did you do????? heh heh
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:28 am20Bearded Gooner

I think Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. So FIFA, and Barca for that matter, are a complete mockery or just insane… or both
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:29 am21Bearded Gooner

Coincidence?
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jul/26/europe-top-clubs-fifa-revolt
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:32 am22True Storey

Nice link BG. Good on you Karl-Heinz.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:34 am23Gavin

It laughable. This is the most black and white case of tapping up ever to exist within football and what do the governing body of the sport do?They support the tapping up by publishing this crap. If FIFA weren’t the most corrupt cunts in football I might even be a little surprised.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:39 am24Bearded Gooner

Thanks TS. I for one don’t actually think it’s a coincidence. I think Karl-Heinz is an avid holic reader.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:41 am25Petter

Page is 404 now, meaning they have removed it. Do you have a larger screenshot of this shit?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:44 am26oldgooner

Hey Xavi, have some of this you cunt.

http://forzaitalianfootball.com/2011/07/milan-frontrunners-for-cesc-fabregas-signature/
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:49 am27Lonestar Gooner

I figured the bar service had moved on…

From the last session –

Ahoy, hoy ‘Holics,

*shuffles up to bar, sets down briefcase, and pulls up stool*

So here are the latest developments from Denilson-Gate:
I confronted Mrs. Lonestar regarding my concerns over her Denilson love-interest which was communicated to me whilst I was sleeping the other night.

She had the temerity to deny all interest in said Brazilian and proceeded to accuse me of having some Arsenal-related fetish. (Speaking of fetishes, I have not, nor will not ever, reveal to her my “side-gig” raising llamas.)

She then went further and told me that IF she had any interest in leaving me and our baby Lady Gooner to take a vacation with an Arsenal man it would be in this order: (1) Henry [I objected that he is currently a NY Red Bull and should not count - but she would not listen to reason], (2) Theo [I accused her of robbing the cradle - and quickly dodged a frying pan directed at me noggin], (3) Cesc [no arguments from me there, he is a handsome lad], (4) RVP, and (5) Ramsay.

I’m not sure what to think now. Should I be happy that my dreams were inaccurate, and I am in no danger of losing her to Sir IPAnemaness? Or should I be worried that, instead of watching games with me for the quality football, Mrs. Lonestar seems only to be tolerating the spectacle for glimpses of young beefcake?

I need a drink and some counsel, fellas.

*Looks around for CMC*

Perhaps Clive would be amenable to putting me in contact with a nurse or two from the SU to take care of me in case the unthinkable ever occurred?

And no, PHW, a clandestine visit from Lady N will not suffice. Asian llamas don’t really fit in my herd…no offense intended – just personal preference.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:51 am28takeabowson

Evenin’ All ,

Time for a quick night cap .

Good work ‘Holic , and great stuff Old@16 .

Great link Bearded , the worm is starting to turn .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:00 am29True Storey

Ahoy Lonestar

And there was I, earlier today, trying to convince everyone that “Lonestar Toes”

I have forwarded your conundrum to Marje Proops but should warn you that she lacks tolerance these days. Just ask poor old Wolfgang
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:01 am30Snir Geuli

Oldgunner – I saw that this morning and still haven’t figured out what I’d think about such a scenario were it to happen.

What would you guys think and how would you feel if Cesc would move to a team which isn’t Barca?

I’m not sure how I’d feel but it’s leaning towards hurt, insult and feel of disrespect towards the Arsenal.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:04 am31Wolfgang Smallballs

Dont go to Marje , Lonestar , she is not a compassionate woman .

All I can say is I sympathise with your wife . I get a boner whenever the gunners are in town .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:06 am32True Storey

He’s back!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:11 am33Wolfgang Smallballs

Yes indeed TS , but don’t tell tabs , he has banned me as i refuse to moderate my match day wear . I shall be shedding light on Clive’s speedo mystery tomorrow , before joining up again with my new playmates from Malaysia .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:16 am34True Storey

Your secrets are safe with me Wolfgang. Look forward to the great unravelling of the Speedo mystery.

G’night / G’morning all.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:18 am35Lurkers

‘Hoilc, do I get a finders fee?

half a lager will do.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:15 am36behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: LG @27: Lonestar, This is very bad news indeed! TH14 and Mrs. Lonestar are a hot item and there’s nothing to be done about it! Llama toes and high tides forever, man.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:25 am37Mog

blimey, a chap goes into Mugabe media lockdown for a few short months to lick his wounds and, on returning, can hardly understand the new injokes at the bar! A scotch for anyone still in, please, barkeep.

I really hope the clubs crack the whip with FIFA but I’m not optimistic given the response to the FA’s suggestions at corruption. Mind you, look at the way they’re hammering the Murdochs. Totally unrelated of course but one almost dares to hope…
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:39 am38Mog

@Snir – I’d take him going to Inter for £40m, that would be a sharp lesson in manners to the classless Catalans… Honestly, to try and factor in compensation for “taking their youngsters away”- not just in the press, but in actual contract negotiations (assuming that is accurate) is curious to say the least. They are simply drunk on their own self-importance – that’s the only way I can rationally explain it.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:30 am39behind the 8 ball but not nasri

From the Department of Don’t Make Me Laugh / Give Me a Break:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jul/26/blackburn-rovers-champions-league

The chances of Kean being sacked within four weeks are better than the chances of Blackburn being in the Champions League within four years. Ladbrokes ought to know.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:35 am40Lonestar Gooner

Sorry for my delay in rejoining the drinks, ‘Holics. Had to finish up some work and spend some time with the baby Lady Gooner – never too young to work on footwork and dribbling skills.

Anyways, TS @29, there is only “one who knows” or so I am told. I must be careful, for to utter his name right now might subject me to intense chastisement. Perhaps he knows about toes? Maybe Lonestar knows that the Frenchman will show that he knows toes this season.

BTW, I don’t remember forwarding the Llama Toe Chaser recipe (@17) Something foul is afoot. *Snarf, snarf* One of these days, I’ll get access to the bar regulars’ backdoor communication channels, then I can send the recipe across secure commo channels.

Regardless, a consultation with Marje is just what the “Dr.” ordered.

Wolfgang, I must admit that #31 is not what I needed to hear. I’m not in the greatest physical shape, so I don’t need any additional competition. Winning awards for Texas’ Most Seductive Llama only gets one so far. If this continues, I may have to only watch uglier teams play when I am at home. I know, I could watch the Geordies at home and watch the Reds in a bar. Nah, it would hurt too much to watch bad football. The good thing about American Football is you can’t see their faces.

Nas @36, I thought I could expect more support from my American compadre. Just the thought of the missus with TH14…well, he was a prolific goal scorer – no, perish the thought.

I think I am bound for the psych ward. Where is PHW when you need him?

UTA
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:45 am41Lonestar Gooner

OldG,

I would have serious questions for our captain if he signed for Milan. I would not be happy with us for selling him with time left on his contract, but I could understand the desire to be rid of the whole distraction.

But if Cesc went anywhere other than Farca, it would signal to me that he just truly wanted away from US. To me that would indicate that (1) either he is not as Arsenal as many thought he was or (and more frightening) (2) there are fundamental problems at our club, and he just lost patience.

Either way, it is worrying if that rumor has any truth in it.

Macallen, please.

*settling in for a long evening*
on 27 Jul 2011 at 6:19 am42Snir Geuli

Mog – My reply to your @38 is @41 provided by LG
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:31 am43Harsha

Cesc to Milan? Really? I don’t think that will happen

RE:FIFA tapping up – A bunch of corrupt cuntbutlers is what they are

Meanwhile Mata rumours have gathered some pace, haven’ t they?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:51 am44Charlie

I think it’s a general rule that sporting governing bodies have to be shambolic and/or corrupt. As such I find it hard to get too wound up about FIFA, even though I know probably I should do.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:30 am45Ollie

The FIFA website is…..even worse than .con
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:55 am46Kevnal

This FIfa website is beyond a joke – can see a revolution in the pipeline.
Our very own club website has had some interesting articles recently perhaps to subtlety break the news we
are about to lose our captain and nas – Ramsey talking about how the great understanding between himself , jack and ADSB is gonna be great 4 arsenal. Also how Gamerio (psg) thinks that kos has all the right ingredients to make a great CB – does this mean we won’t see samba , Cahill or Jag anytime soon.
Anyone else looking forward to the season with great trepidation?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:55 am47Charlie

On another note, I find myself rather cruelly enjoying Birmingham’s woes at the moment.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:25 am48Harsha

IE and the arses are not a good combo..

Quiet here today

I have snuck out from work, just to have a quick pint

Cheers and a drink for anyone at the bar
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:40 am49Camberwell Gooner

Charlie, nothing cruel about it! They are pikey scum and exist on this earth to be ridiculed and abused. Nothing else.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:41 am50Camberwell Gooner

Oh and P.S., Barry Ferguson is a cunt. 50.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 12:52 pm51Peter Hill-Wood

Note to Ivan’s PA.

Rather a bad night I’m afraid, and not too sure where to start.

There is some good news and some bad news.
The good news is that I have solved the Fabregas / Nasri situation.

I called in at the training camp and decided to have a word with them both about ‘greedy’ players.

Young Fabregas took exception and said he simply wanted to play for Barcelona. I’m afraid I chortled and said something to the effect that he probably wouldn’t get in their team. He called me an out of touch old fool and said ” Right! I’ll show you!”.
To which I replied, “No, I’ll show you, young man!” and I sacked him on the spot.

Then Nasri joined in the argument and I’m afraid I rather lost my temper and told the greedy little shit that tomorrow wouldn’t be too soon for him to piss off too.

The bad news is that when the rest of the squad tried to intervene I got very upset and somehow ended up telling the lot of them to “fuck right off” and sacked the whole lot of them.

We may get away with having no first team for one match, however.
It appears that in the Emirates Cup, so fixated is Arsene on youth, that he has arranged for us to play Boca’s Juniors. I have, therefore, arranged for the whole junior team to be at the ground in readiness for what should be a good even match.

God alone knows what will happen when we play these damned Americans though.
Lady Nina, always such a “huge admirer” of Thierry Henry, is determined to make the most of the opportunity to get him alone in the dressing rooms at some point during proceedings. I discovered that she has used some of her new gotten-millions to bribe the Red Bulls coach.
While everyone is otherwise engaged on the touchlines, he is going to allow her to pull him off before half-time, and have her evil way!

HELP!!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:08 pm52Ollie

Heh, good work PHW.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:09 pm53Snir Geuli

OK guys, this is truly hilarious… seriously, genius.

http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opinion/columnists/annie-eaves/Annie-Eaves-Barcelona-DNA-Alexis-Sanchez-Cesc-Fabregas-Sergio-Busquets-Xavi-article776502.html
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:20 pm54Snir Geuli

Would be fairly happy with that kind of an offer.

http://www.turkish-football.com/news_read.php?id=930
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:30 pm55takeabowson

PHW , at this rate , you’re gonna leave me with nothing to write . Great stuff
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:39 pm56behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: Lonestar @40, Not everything is lost my man, I expect LL and TH14 can be persuaded to give you an autographed picture of them pair of them with a red lipstick imprint in the center of LL’s reputedly luscious lips as a kind of sweet and sour souvenir. Few of us will be able to say we have quite such a personal connection to both TH14 and the Ukulele toting Brazilian D15.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:41 pm57behind the 8 ball but not nasri

PHW, On behalf of Coquelin, Eastmond, Lansbury and the rest of the fringe players, may I say Good Work. This is the opportunity of their lifetimes!!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:55 pm58Holloway2Holland

Nice find ‘holic, the saddest thing from my perspective is that it doesn’t really surprise me any more, they did it last year too and let Barca get away with it on an almost daily basis. It’s all well and good removing said article, but just like other multi media thingymijigs, ie Twatter, once a message has been posted, it is there! Removal matters not one jot, seen is seen.

Until FIFA is allowed to be regulated by an outside entity then the corruption and general cuntdom will just continue.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 1:56 pm59Holloway2Holland

Good plan from PHW, sort them out sir.

Nice link @53 Snir, who would of thought that something in the Mirror could be that good.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:00 pm60imissbergkamp

walcott flying back with an ankle injury..henderson out for 6 months as well…so the pre-season racking up of injuries has begun
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:13 pm61Peter Hill-Wood

Sorry Takeabowson, I would probably be better recommended to keep my own counsel for the rest of my holiday.

Might just keep me out of trouble.

Do ask Ivan’s PA for his thoughts though.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:40 pm62behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Wherefore yon lovely Brazilian dancing girls at the Emirates this season given the departure of aforementioned Ukulele toting D15. Wasn’t this going to be the season BtM caught them on camera and posted pictures for our enjoyment?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 2:41 pm63Holloway2Holland

From the previous drinks, I wasn’t going to rise to the bait, but, ah who am I kidding, ofcourse I was.

SV, I said nothing of the quality of the history of the Copa, my comments were over the latest installment, which imho was piss poor. For entertainment value, the WWC was better to watch, once again an opinion and not a “fakht”

Futher, you do love your stats, don’t ya? Personaly I think they’re a waste of time, nothing but a gimic, to fill up some space between breaks in the game so that the commentaters can look smart by telling us how many times a certain player has broke wind before making a pass. (YAWN) It is a fairly new phenomen in footy, I can’t remember anyone being too obbsessed with them in the 70′s and 80′s.

But, I’ll play your game, so here are some historical stats to counter your stats;
South American teams have won the WC, 9 times ot of 19, so that is not “give or take 50%” because stats are an exact science (once again YAWN) Brazil, Argentina (the 78 WC was diabolicaly corupt) and Uraguay who first won in 1930 when there were only 12 teams (4 european) are the 3 American teams to do it.

Europe on the otherhand has had 5 champions, England, Germany, Italy, France and Spain. Statisicaly seen 5 winners trumps 3.

If the teams from SA are so good then why is there not one in the FIFA top 4, “let’s do the math together” shall we?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:33 pm64Lars

oldgooner@26: I have to say that the disappointment of seeing Cesc leave for Milan would almost (but only almost) be outweighed by the massive schadenfreude towards Barcelona. Talk about giving them the finger… but I still find it very hard to believe that this would be true. However, there is a growing feeling inside of me that maybe, just maybe, Cesc feels betrayed by both Barca and Arsenal and out of disappointment (due to promises not being fulfilled, people making claims on his behalf etc) he no longer wants anything to do with either club.

Harsha@43: have to agree, there seems to be an awful lot of smoke for there not to be a fire under it. Now that does in no way mean that I think we will buy him, but I think Arsene has at least shown a genuine interest in him.

Camberwell@50: so true!

Snir@53: that was actually really good, even the tabloids can sometimes come up with some good stuff.

Lonestar@27: so what you are saying is that your missus vehemently refuses to have a Brazilian?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:38 pm65behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: LG @27: Your llama thing is a side-gig? I thought it was one of those full-frontal jobs.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:57 pm66Steve T

FIFA condone the tapping up of Cesc? Shock horror. No doubt the complaint has already been written by the club and is on its way now.??????? Or, maybe it isn’t.

Theo already injured??????? That can’t be right? I mean, he is so robust that he never misses a game?

Am I the only one that is starting to think that we have been here before? No doubt all of the impending new signing will help lift the mood????

Groundhog Day? With cherries on the top.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 3:58 pm67Camberwell Gooner

So Henderson’s out for 6 months. Does this mean AW will have to make a new signing to cover the, er, new signing?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:03 pm68behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Hey Steve T, You don’t like Groundhog Day? If not for it, wouldn’t things be too unpredictable?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:06 pm69Holloway2Holland

Real shame for Henderson, but was he really a viable option even as cover?

I do agree that we are strongly in need for reinforcements on the left side of defence, I can’t see Gibbs lasting a whole term either. You know I don’t usually indulge in speculation, but wouldn’t it be worth a punt on Newcastle’s Jose Enrique, he wouldn’t cost the world and had a good year in the PL last season.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:07 pm70Steve T

8 ball. No, I don’t like it.

The way things are going I might take my boots at the weekend. I reckon I could get at least 20 minutes. Going to stretch those old hamstrings off right now.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:07 pm71Wolfgang Smallballs

Dear Clive ,

Firstly may I apologise for the length of time that it has taken to get back to you . As you might be aware , I was caught up in a terribly dangerous hostage situation in Kuala Lumpur , where only the intervention of Ladyboy legal eagle Lucy Nutcrackerjee and Tabs secured my release .

As you can understand , the whole ordeal was terribly frightening , and I needed a few days on the beach , relaxing with the Gooner Ladyboy Massive ( who have become good friends ) , partaking in a little light Breaststroke , taking in a Speedo sponsored Beach Volleyball Tournament ( my , oh my ! ) and reading my Mark Spitz Autobiography .

After a few days of such revelry , my spirits were restored and I felt compelled to thank both Tabs and Ms Nutcrackerjee for their efforts . Indeed , in a light-hearted moment after the cinzanos had been flowing , I asked if there was anything I could do for them in return for their kindnesses .

Lucy Nutcrackerjee asked me to take the Gooner Ladyboy Massive on a holiday to the UK . Tabs asked me if there was anything I could do to help secure your release . Sensing that I could kill 2 birds with one stone , I immediately agreed to their requests .

And so it was that 2 nights ago , I headed a daring raid with 6 high ranking members of The Gooner Ladyboy Massive , into the heart of Darkness . The Raid was not without initial operational difficulties . I was of course in my Speedoes and Jimmy Choos , which I felt gave me the necessary air of authority , whilst the rest of my team insisted on going “Commando “ . They of course wanted me to join them , but I refused , I am simply not a man who can get away with the “sans speedo “ look . Indeed , sensing things might turn nasty , underneath my Speedos I wore the pink cannon-laden jock-strap you mention , so that I could wear a cricket box with extra comfort .

Dinner lady Iben Dover let us in through her back door , which pleased the Ladyboys no end . I had brought some frozen peas with me and these were left with Iben . The purpose of the peas were twofold , firstly to let Iben know we were from Tabs , and secondly , to aid your escape . Because the peas are frozen , they are as hard as bullets , and Tabs had the fanciful notion that you might become known as the first Peashooter Escape . That the peas ended up with Sebastian I can shed no light , I can only think she was tortured very badly . As you know it takes an awful lot to get Iben to part with her peas .

The plan went badly wrong at an early stage . The noise of my Jimmy Choos on the stone floors alerted the guards and we were escorted immediately to Mincing Mary’s room . He began to tease me about my speedos and I was held down whilst my speedos were forcibly removed , ( he immediately knew my weakpoint and exploited it ruthlessly ) . He then began to soil my speedos with his spatula polish . The cunt .

The Ladyboys were of course outraged at this lack of respect and set about Mincing Mary like a pack of wild dogs . I dived into the bath . At times of great stress I feel the need for a little light breaststroke . Unfortunately I dived straight into the Tap End , knocking myself out and giving myself a nose bleed .

When I came to , I was back at my house , a little worryingly sans Jock strap . When I asked what happened all the Ladyboys would tell me is that the guards were overpowered , Mincing Mary was smuggled out , and that he is now being put “ to good use “ .

I apologise that our raid was unsuccessful , although the disappearance of Mincing Mary should make things easier for you , when the time comes for escape . Get hold of Iben’s peas . Also , she has built some underground tunnels , and she will almost certainly show you her holes if required . Finally , watch out for Detective Clooless . He can’t resist showing people his helmet .

Good Luck and see you on the HT ,

Wolfgang Smallballs .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:09 pm72Steve T

H2H. We have far too many who we all know have not got a hope in hell of getting through the season unscathed. It won’t be a shock to any off us.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:17 pm73Camberwell Gooner

Deep breath, count to ten, take magazine out of machine gun…

Now that Theo has been sent back early because of his knacked ankle and Henderson’s van-Persie’d himself before he could even watch a competitive Arsenal game, we take up our familiar place as the butt of everyone’s jokes.

I’m putting my fingers in my ears and singing “la la la la la laaaah” continuously for the next 2 weeks. If I can’t see you, you’re not there.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 4:47 pm74takeabowson

Thanks ‘Holic , again
on 27 Jul 2011 at 6:17 pm75bernard

Steve T@ 66, Bolton have outspent us in the last 5 years. This 5 years of underinvestment is starting to show. The biggest danger to Arsenal isn’t debt, it’s dwindling crowds.
Yet we have the highest paid Manager in the Prem on 6M a year, we have the 2nd Richest Owners in the League & Arsenal are ranked 3rd in the Most Valued Football teams in the World next to Real Madrid & Man Utd. Why the fuck is it so hard to complete a transfer?
The finance sheet comes before the team sheet.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 6:50 pm76imissbergkamp

@ CG – 73
no news on seriousness of walcott’s injury.
hoping for the best but knowing our luck….
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:02 pm77Harsha

What we can realistically expect is one more signing before the deadline- most probably a center back

Cesc/Nasri- If both stay no one will be bought, if one of them goes a replacement will be brought in

I guess we should start stacking up the CMC

Snir@53 Nice one

Cheers
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:13 pm78Charlie

‘If the teams from SA are so good then why is there not one in the FIFA top 4, “let’s do the math together” shall we?’

Whoa there, I agree with some of your argument, but I hope you don’t mean FIFA rankings there, as that would imply you’re taking them seriously.

Bernard – last I checked we were doing a lot better than Bolton.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:44 pm79Glennw

Evening holic& holics
adapted joke from daily star (crap paper)
I found a bottle on the beach & gave it a rub & out popped a genie who gave me 1 wish. I said I want to live forever, sorry can’t do that wish he said, ok I said I want to die when spurs win the premiership title. You crafty bastard he said.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:46 pm80behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Good one, Glennw. London Pride for the gentleman, please barman.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:56 pm81Trev

On arsenal.com AW says that Walcott’s injury is one that “comes and goes”. It needs more investigation and he returned to England for an MRI scan.

If he has been carrying an injury that requires more investigation, I am struggling to imagine why that wasn’t done as soon as the season ended. Why would you wait ’til now to find out if there is a structural problem, when the player has just had 7 weeks off.

I’ m going to need an upgrade to my seat on the HT ‘cos the one I have is beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable.

The end-of-season talk about needing more maturity and experience seems to have ceased.

If we are really “certainly not finished in the transfer market” (IG) then when exactly are we proposing to bring some maturity and experience (or anything) in ?

Gazidis was a top negotiator supposedly in the MLS. He says that we have substantial funds. So what are the issues that are occupying us for so long, that don’t appear to be so problematic for our rivals.

Do we just have no targets ?

Please don’t anybody answer that we are only interested in “super-quality”. That is not what it takes to replace Denilson, Eboue, Squillaci etc. etc.

Sorry – none of that is very original. But neither is the feeling that we are hopelessly bloody disorganised in the transfer market.

I hope that in 48 hours I will be tucking into my own words.

Come on Arsenal, S-S-F-M.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:57 pm82behind the 8 ball but not nasri

If the stories are true about our being one step away from signing Juan Mata, that one step must be the test to see whether he has Valencia DNA. Actually, Arseblog said something more realistic this morning, namely that the one step is to get his signature on an Arsenal contract, but it does seem that we will either have Cesc or Mata, not both. On the other hand, will anybody join me in a drink to our having both of them this season?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 7:58 pm83Trev

Glennw – nice one,
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:00 pm84Trev

nasri – I’ll join you in a drink to anything that is actually decided,
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:03 pm85behind the 8 ball but not nasri

*starts drinking alone in case the rest of you think I’m going barmy”
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:05 pm86behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Trev, How about a drink to celebrate the victors at the Battle of Hastings.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:06 pm87Trev

Tabs – do you run a story board at home ? Don’t know how else you remember all your various plots.

Great stuff anyway
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:07 pm88Lonestar Gooner

Heh, Glennw. Very clever.

I’ll take a London Pride myself; if you don’t mind, Nas.

Raising llamas HAS to be a side gig. Still have to pay the bills, even if Mrs. Lonestar has fantasies of “alternate” Gunner glory.

Wolfgang, you should show up in a Borat man-kini. That would guarantee silverware this weekend.

Cheers all.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:08 pm89Trev

nasri – eye will
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:09 pm90Steve T

Bernard. Regrettably I don’t know any of the answers to your questions. It is still a mystery to me.

I think the point is not one of comparing us to Bolton in achievenent. It is there to highlight the fact that we do not spend as much. Surely we are financially in a better place than bolton?

As I have said more times than I care to remember on here. It is not about being the best in the world. I would not be as arrogant. For me it is about being the best we can be. To optomise what we have as a football club. For me I am just not convinced that we do that. I think we can be better than we are doing with what we have.

Just my humble opinion of course.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:12 pm91behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: WS @71: Good to hear you’ve been keeping busy, old boy. Lucy Nutcrackerjee can be quite a friend, once she is on your side as I understand she now is. Did she show you her thing?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:23 pm92takeabowson

Trev@81 – Good post – it’s very difficult to fathom what’s going on at the moment . The super de-luxe comfy seats will not be installed on the HT for another week , so here’s hoping . I refuse to believe we’ll go into the new season with the same 4 central defenders . As regards the Walcott injury , the failure to treat is as you say equally baffling .

All I can hope at this stage is that once one signing/departure occurs , they all fall into place like a pack of cards .

I do think the nature of the transfer window means that deals will get done later and later , unless you’re prepared to pay vastly over the odds a la Liverpool .

Anyway , Nas , I’ll join you in a drink , Hastings or otherwise .

Nice one GlenW@79
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:24 pm93Chippy

Look on the brightside lads when Henderson and Walcott return in the year 2028 they will be like new signings – And besides the top are happy they can now use the old injury excuse for next season already I can see it now by the time Walcott is back his previous performances had morphed into a cross between Zidane and V Basten Cynical me never !!!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:32 pm94takeabowson

SteveT @90 – Dont disagree with any of that – especially given the noises that came out of the club at the end of the season . I think it’s relatively easy to defend the lack of net spend to 2009 . It gets far more difficult to do so when talking about last summer and this one .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:37 pm95takeabowson

Trev@87 – Thanks . I just take my cue from Clive

LG and Nasri – WS has disappeared to play with his friends , but I’m sure if he was here , he would say that his relationship with Lucy Nutcrackerjee was entirely professional . As for the mankini , if Speedo do one , I’m sure he would be interested
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:41 pm96behind the 8 ball but not nasri

London Pride please barman, for Tabs, LG, Trev, and all around the bar. On Lars’ tab, of course.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:47 pm97behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: Tabs @95, Entirely professional, you say? I didn’t know that Wolfgang was running a business.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:47 pm98takeabowson

Thank you Nas . Lars’ tab only gets a rest on his birthday
on 27 Jul 2011 at 8:49 pm99takeabowson

They had a Solicitor/ client relationship Nas .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:08 pm100Lars

100!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:09 pm101takeabowson

Just in time , Lars . Your round ?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:15 pm102Lars

I just realized I have claimed the double today – first and 100th

I too am amazed that Theo’s injury wasn’t assessed earlier on. If it is indeed the same one that he suffered last ten months ago, why has it taken until NOW to start doing MRI:s and stuff?

Steve T: “For me it is about being the best we can be. To optomise what we have as a football club. For me I am just not convinced that we do that.”

I really hope that you are wrong. For me it just would be so incredibly stupid to not use money that we have budgeted for transfers/wages that I can not believe it would be the case, but on the other hand things don’t really add up. Yes, I get the bit about only world-class players being able to replace players like Cesc, Vermaelen, Robin or Wilshere but as has already been pointed out – it does not take too much to replace Denilson with a player that improves the squad depth.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:16 pm103Lars

Of course it is my round, tabs!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:18 pm104behind the 8 ball but not nasri

WHere is TS? Organizing the posse for PIK?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:20 pm105takeabowson

Good man Lars !
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:25 pm106takeabowson

Possibly so Nas in the meantime we’ll have t make do with the Chinese Green .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:38 pm107Lars

Just found this quote on the Arsenal Sweden forum, I assume it is from Twitter:

“Arsenal NEVER lost a competitive game when @cesc4official has scored since 2003-2011. 49 Matches, 54 Goals scored, 41 Wins, 8 Draws.”

Quite impressive, I have to say. In other words, all we need to do to go another season unbeaten is to make sure Cesc stays and then scores in every game!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 9:43 pm108Charlie

With Benfica looking good for a seeding alongside us and Bayern etc in the European Cup qualifying, it’s like our propspective opponents will be taken from the following:

Udinese
Rubin Kazan or Dynamo Kiev (Kazan 2-0 up after first leg)
Twente or FC Vaslui (Twente 2-0 up after first leg)
Odense or Panathinaikos (1-1 after first leg)
Standard Liege or FC Zurich (1-1 after first leg)

Any from the last three ties preferably! Some blasts from the past there too in Odense and Standard Liege.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:25 pm109takeabowson

Impressive stat Lars , let’s drink to your last sentence coming true .

Agreed Charlie , although I think Kazan are the only ones capable of really scaring us . Remember Odense giving us the real collywobbles in the cup-winners Cup a while ago .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:27 pm110Charlie

I wouldn’t want Kazan, though looking at their recent European record, they’re not quite as formidable as I thought (only one group stage win last year I think, and then lost to Twente in the UEFA Cup/Europa League), the shock defeat of Barcelona apart. Would still much prefer any of the other options of course!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:32 pm111John hawleys left foot

Now what’s the form with the weekend? Do we boycott the games so the empty seats spring the club into action or turn up and sing, spend some fuckin money for 90 minutes?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:37 pm112takeabowson

That’s a bit more comforting Charlie re Kazan , thanks for the info .
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:45 pm113Charlie

111 – try turning up and supporting the team, usually a good strategy
on 27 Jul 2011 at 10:48 pm114Goonerholic

One way of looking at it, at the end of the day Jhlf, anybody voting with their feet means even less money for the club and the perfect excuse not to invest.

I think the club were prepared for a low gate Saturday when the opponents were invited, and let’s face it, at the price of tickets this weekend it is not a massive hit.

So all things considered if you still love your Arsenal, go this weekend, and if you are still on a downer give it a swerve until you have your mojo back.

As Gladys Knight once said at a gig of hers I saw, “I can’t make you feel good if you don’t feel good already”.

She was lying though
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:19 pm115North Bank 1

I really am beginning to get depressed…..I know its very premature and whilst I try my hardest to remain positive and believe it just is really really baffling as to what these lot think they are playing at!!

Still no word from Stan. Still no resolution to the Nasri/Cesc debacle (yes I am aware we are ‘waiting’ on Barca but I’m sure the manager said he wouldn’t let this sorry saga rumble on til 31/8). Still no CB. No talk of a LB. Now Theo out with an injury that ‘comes and goes’. The flippancy of the comment is staggering given our recent injury record.

I wrote at the back end of last year the AW is asking boys to do men’s work….I cannot honestly see what has changed this year. Once again he is asking the team to do the same, this time with 2 (if both stay) central figures that would rather be elsewhere.

This situation is serious and needs to be addressed immediately so that we can focus on the task ahead. I mean seriously, £20m+ for a player in the last year of his contract who clearly could give a fuck and probably will play second half of season not wanting to get injured so as to ruin a lucrative summer move.

As for Cesc I don’t buy the whole ‘he’s given us great service’ bullshit. He has been paid a huge amount of money that any one of us would give our right testicle to perform. Captain of the finest team in England. Maybe not the most successful but certainly the classiest and without a doubt the best this capital will EVER have to offer. Yes he left his boyhood club, and then he made his name in London. Yet he still is yet to bring it ‘over the line.’ 98% ain’t shit if the 2% means you end up 2nd or more often than not, 3rd. Listen Xavi is a cock. No doubt. However I don’t for 1 minute doubt these stories that come out of the likes of Xavi etc have not been to some extent Cesc’s words. We all saw his embaressing behaviour before the second leg in the Nou Camp. He played for how long with an injury, purely for his own ego (fuck he did it for the team otherwise he’d have sat his arse on the bench at HT). Don’t even get me started about the backheel.

I don’t wanna slate the guy and sound more ungrateful than I’m sure many of reading think I am but FFS lets stop this crying about the Barca boys and lets look at our boy for a sec. Not once has he come out and offered any words/statement (even if a bullshit gesture) that contradicts or criticises the behaviour of the Barca players. But once again, they get their words from somewhere.

Barca not being prepared to pay more than a certain amount? Has someone with inside knowledge of a conversation had between himself and the manager let it slip that a certain bid should acquire his services. I for one defo reckon that convo was had whilst Xavi and the prince-in-waiting were getting their eyebrows plucked!

I’m proper sick of the fucking lot of them. Stan. Gazidis. Wenger. Nasri. Cesc.

If any of the above could feel what I/we feel then this bullshit would have been sorted out at least three weeks ago.

At least purple nose ‘get’s it’. I feel dirty for saying this but I do look at Manure fans with a sense of envy as throughout the mans career his ambitions have always been clear-cut – Win. Moan to refs. Compete £ for £. Sell disruptive influences. Whatever. But all for the sake of winning.

What happened?

I’m off to listen to Portishead.

Bartender a glass, no fuck it, bottle of Red please.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:30 pm116Goonerholic

Can I recommend Leonard Cohen, mate?
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:30 pm117Steve T

Lars @102

I think we have missed the boat for a couple of years now. I said last season that I would be really pissed if the obvious shortfalls that had not been addressed came back to haunt us. Sadly they did.

I will reserve judgement until the window is closed. However with the season less than 3 weeks away and a Champions League qualifier following close behind you have to wonder what is going on? Who knows, Cesc and Sami might well stay. (not having any money on it though). We might also have 3 new signings by the end of August but whoever may or may not come in you have to ask if that is ideal preperation for those early days? My view is that it is not. What really frustrates me is that if we had made the right decisions for the last few seasons then we would really only need minor surgery.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:42 pm118Lars

North Bank 1@115: “Not once has he come out and offered any words/statement (even if a bullshit gesture) that contradicts or criticises the behaviour of the Barca players. ”

Actually, he has. He has stated on several occasions that he is happy at Arsenal. That contradicts most of what Xavi and others have claimed.

Steve T@117: ideally, I would have wanted the signing done and dusted at least a few weeks ago. I am 100% with you on that point. I would give a whole lot to be a fly on the wall at Highbury House and at the training ground offices so that I could learn the real truth about what the hell is going on. I am not going to blame anyone because I have no idea who to blame. I don’t think it is Wenger, but I might be completely wrong – maybe he is the proverbial spanner in the works? Or maybe it is the board? Or are we just crap negotiators? Or… etc.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:52 pm119North Bank 1

@ Lars

actions speak louder than words…..I also remember him inferring its the club that want to sell him.

But you right and I’m wrong. He has stated he’s happy at our club. My bad.

I look forward to seeing him run the team out at Newcastle August 13th then.
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:58 pm120North Bank 1

@ Goonerholic

Will look into Cohen, although my mood has been lifted somewhat with Mr B Marley and in particular the specially scented cigarettes he was known to have smoked from time to time.

Ahh, the sweet smell of ‘erb and cold Red Stripe in hand, Cha!
on 27 Jul 2011 at 11:59 pm121Lars

NB1: he did not infer that the club wants to sell him. That was an incorrect quote (more precisely a piss-poor translation from Spanish to English) attributed to him by the tabloids. What he said was in fact pretty much the opposite, he said that he did not have the problem of the club not wanting him.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:09 am122North Bank 1

@ Lars

Ah ha, so that’s what it was then! Ok I get it – it’s all the tabloids doing!! Well that and obviously those pesky cads over at Barca. Xavi that lying bastard! Bet he never even saw Cesc in Ibiza….I mean, making things up like that. Shame on him.

Poor Cesc, and there I was fooled into believing that he wants to play 5-a-side again with Iniesta and Messi, get his back waxed with Xavi and sung to sleep with the rest of the Barca squad with lullabies from Shakira.

Silly me. Once again I stand corrected. I doubly look forward to seeing him run the team out at Newcastle now.

Hmm….
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:12 am123Clive Waterman,[ Gooner since 54 ]

Lars
Did you play Pass the Parcel at your birthday party.??
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:19 am124North Bank 1

@ Lars

I apologise for the sarcasm but come on, there needs to be a balance to this and whilst it is clear the Barca players are out of order I do get the feeling that our Cesc is being a bit disingenuous.

As I said, he’s actions (bromance with the entire Barca line up pre kick-off, his irresponsible/selfish actions in same said game when carrying an injury) speak louder maybe than his words.

But hey, if he leads the team out in August and is great I will be the first to take back every word. However if he is poor for the first few games it will certainly cross my mind that he wants to be somewhere else.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:34 am125Lars

Clive: no, Pass the Parcel (and I have to confess to googling it to see what it actually is – I have heard the expression many times without ever really understanding what the game is about) is not something we do here in Sweden. We basically just give presents to the one whose birthday it is and watch him/her open them

NB1: apology accepted, no worries! I think this situation is quite difficult for him, my impression is that he really wants to play for both teams and out of respect for Arsenal he does not want to say anything bad about the club, but at the same time he doesn’t want to say anything bad about Barca either. Add to that the fact that whatever he says will be twisted, taken out of context or downright lied about – then I can understand him not saying pretty much anything.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:34 am126Glennw

Jhlf
I’m taking my boys on both days they are aged 4 & 6 years old and I reckon they already got more of an idea on how to support their club than you ever will have
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:37 am127Clive Waterman,[ Gooner since 54 ]

Wolfgang @ 71
Wonderfully evocative description of your ‘ assault ‘ on the SU,
Many many thnks for your efforts on my behalf.
My only concern is that now i know the Deviants among us had no part in MM’s disappearance,why have they been looking so smug lately.??
They have been seen at breakfast,inserting their sausages through the ‘ Ring ‘ donuts, and making obscene grunting noises as they demolish first the sausage and then the Donut.!! Yuk.
What are they up to.??
My 2 month ‘ holiday ‘ in the SU comes to an end this w/end and i don’t want any last minute drama’s to throw a spannner in the works.
I think the ‘ Straight up and Downers ‘ among us,need to have a secret meeting.
I fear with MM now out of the way,the coast is clear for the Deviants to mount a coup and take over the SU,
If this happens they may then start doing some despicable things to
us S & D’s to try and convert us to the ‘ Dark Side’
I have been trying to get hold of the lovely C,but i am told she is in
‘ Intensive Interrogation ‘ with Inspector Clooless.
I know he has the serious hots for her and i just hope and pray that he will not allow his ‘ Urges ‘ to get the better of him.
Hopefully the rest of the night will pass peacefully and us S & D’s can start planning our defences against the Pagan Hordes.
Thnks once again for your assistance Wolfie,
Let’s hope i make it out alive.!!
cheers
Clive
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:43 am128Clive Waterman,[ Gooner since 54 ]

Lars
Sorry mate i was winding you up.!!
Pass the parcel is a tradition at Birthday parties for young children,but understandably lost on you.
Did you not play that game when you were young.??
cheers
clive
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:58 am129Lars

Clive: no, never played it. It’s not a game we play over here
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:28 am130Holloway2Holland

Evening/morning fellow ‘holics.

Once again I’m comming of a heavy session (like I said before … Pro!!) so I’ll tread carefully.

Quoted;

“78Charlie
‘If the teams from SA are so good then why is there not one in the FIFA top 4, “let’s do the math together” shall we?’

Whoa there, I agree with some of your argument, but I hope you don’t mean FIFA rankings there, as that would imply you’re taking them seriously.”

Charlie mate, this is my arguement to say that stats don’t mean shit, the latest rankings are;

1 Spain
2 NL
3 Ze Germans
4 En-ger-land

The first 3 can be debated, but number 4 is like a joke with a punchline that I don’t get.

I’m just trying to point out to SV (and others) that stats can be misleading and are not the be all and end all of everything.

Steve T, I’ve had the pleasure of reading your posts on here over the last few years and I’ve almost always been in agreement with you. I remember all too well that you have been saying, that major investment hasn’t been needed, just a few tweeks here and there. The tweeks that you (and others) highlighted last season were unfortunatly not addressed and I think that it cost us the title.

Trev, I totally agree, it seems like mismanagment that Theo’s problems were not adressed earlier.

NB1, I understand where you’re comming from, but I wouldn’t question Cesc’s professionalism for one second (Nasri can fuck off if he wants) Through out the whole saga (IMHO) he has conducted himself with a class that is beyond his years, in extreamly difficult circumstances and for that he will always have my respect.

Drinks for everyone at the bar, please squire, make that two for Clive after his mounths in captivity.

Cheers.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:37 am131behind the 8 ball but not nasri

H2H, Great post but where are the exclamation marks this time?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:37 am132Holloway2Holland

One before I hit the hay;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MO0dSoUr-Hc

This is the commercial being shown on my sports channel (Sport1) for the Emirates Cup, I love the way it has the no spuds logo. (12-15seconds)

Apologies if this is the same comercial that has been shown elsewhere.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:40 am133Holloway2Holland

Ah Nasri, you got me.

The !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! were forgotten.

A quick night cap (it’s 5:40 here)? Or afternoon bevvy, if that’s where you’re at?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:45 am134Holloway2Holland

Crap, I lied, It’s 4;40.

I hope that says enough……

Bed time!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 6:15 am135Snir Geuli

http://www.goal.com/en/news/14/asia/2011/07/28/2593982/arsenal-readying-ryo-miyaichis-work-permit-application

If Miyaichi gets a work permit, I demand an apology for doubting me lol .

Moment of truth is this weekend – Sell Cesc, or don’t sell. No matter what happens, once that is resolved I hope AW will FINALLY take care of the CB situation.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 7:33 am136John hawleys left foot

Glenw;

Was season ticket holder for 20 years, home and away throughout GG reign, lost my job as bunked off the day to go to anfield in 89, paid £500 which I didn’t have for Paris….

Not since we lost Brady and stapleton have I been as disillusioned as I am now.

You knock yourself out at the weekend for a friendly
on 28 Jul 2011 at 7:41 am137Harsha

Moment of truth, you say Snir….has some deadline been set?

I read on tw*tter that Cesc will miss the Arab cup

/fishy

I hope he stays- all things considered he is a brillinat footballer
on 28 Jul 2011 at 7:47 am138Snir Geuli

Harsha – From what I understood, AW set the end of the month as the deadline.

If he’s gonna be sold, I really don’t want it to be in the middle of August.

The league starts in 16 days!

And one last thing – I can’t remember who it was that said that Nasri can be understood if he wants to leave for “trophies” and his only reason for leaving is ambition but I think this answers it.

http://www.tribalfootball.com/articles/nasri-tells-man-utd-i-will-only-leave-arsenal-man-city-1782231

Ambition and he’d prefer City over United? Does it have anything to do with City’s bank account, because United will always be more ambitious and more successful than City, he’s ruining for himself, City won’t utilize him as well as United cause Manicini insists on playing with 3 DM’s to start their attacks.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:10 am139Stingy Voyageur

Cesc who? Have you ‘holics seen this Thiago kid?

Let’s put ourselves in Barça’s boots for a moment, shall we? They have the best midfield in the world. They nursed Cesc with their own breastmilk until the age of 16. They’ve got this Thiago who could end up to be better than Cesc. FCB does not need Cesc at this time. They will never pay what Arsene is asking. Never. They are in a position of strength. Cesc wants to leave to go to FCB and no where else. It’s a one team market for Cesc. If Arsene keeps this up he’ll tie Cesc up for four years and eventually lose him on a free.

We bitch and moan that FCB won’t pay up whilst we make undervalued attempts at our targets like Jagielka. Isn’t that a bit rich ‘holics? Kinda like the analogy that people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones?

And btw, the way the Malaysians treated Benyoun is a bit sickening from my point of view. I wonder how the BBC is reporting that? No need to tell me. I know. In their typical way.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:17 am140Harsha

SV- How do you know we even bid for Jagielka? Even if we did bid, how do you know it was 10 million?

For me that’s the difference between Arsenal as a club and Barcelona

We conduct or business in a classy manner – rather than bleat on about a player from another club

They nursed Cesc with their own breastmilk alright, but they deemed at the time he was not good enough

We made him into the player that he is now – That much I can say
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:24 am141Stingy Voyageur

Snir,

Rome wasn’t built in a day. And if it wasn’t for the FFP rules, City would inevitably steamroll United. Why? Money. Money eventually creates success. United mastered spending above all others in England before City and United. Let us not forget that. And that’s why I hate them so. When’s the last time they produced a top flight player from their academy? Been a long time since Giggs, Scholes, and Beckham.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:36 am142Stingy Voyageur

Snir – Despite what we are saying publicly the real Cesc deadline is our UCL qualifier first leg. If he plays for us then FCB will wait another year due to Cesc being cup tied. However, considering his hammies he may not even play then. He could pull this hamstring fiasco out all the way to Sept. 1st and the official end of the transfer window. How many of us actually believe he is still injured? Those that answered yes, do you also believe in the Easter Bunny?

He’s doing everything possible to depart our fine club without handing in a transfer request or going on a strike. If there was a gentleman’s agreement last summer, as many of us suspect, and Arsene renegs on it, damn, it does not bode well for Arsene and the club going forward. Even Old Red Nose did not reneg on his gentleman’s agreement with CR7.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:39 am143Charlie

130Holloway2Holland – ah I see now! Apologies, I should have known.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 8:43 am144Stingy Voyageur

At 141-that should be, United perfected buying success before City and Chelsea …
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:07 am145Snir Geuli

SV – First of all, don’t you know not to go overboard with every “hot prospect” that breaks into the scene? When he plays 303 games in the top level and will have the most assists in the top 5 leagues in Europe he’ll be able to say “Cesc who”?

Your comment on the Jagielka is irrelevant. Even if we did bid 10M for Jagielka, that was our FIRST bid as opposed to Barca who bid 5 times for Cesc (29,31 last season. 27,31,35 this season) and all 5 bids were well short of OUR valuation of OUR player.

Money wins trophies? In most cases but not all the time. The

The Invincibles had:
Lehman who wasn’t a big money buy.
Lauren 7.2M.
Campbell came on a free.
Kolo Toure was acquired for 150K!
Ashley Cole HG
Patrick 3.5M
Gilberto 4.5M
Bobby 6M
Freddie 3M
DB 7.5M
Titi 11M.

That is a cheap team no matter how you look at it, especially after we got big bucks for Petit, Overmars and Anelka.

It’s not just money wins trophies, there are other things in football.

One of them is adjusting your formation to the players you have at your club. Playing with 3 DM’s (De Jong, Barry, Toure) when you have talented players like Silva and Johnson is borderline criminal.

Silva should play the Cesc role at City but he doesn’t, instead it’s “kick the ball to Tevez and let’s see what happens”, if you think I’m just saying, have a look at their last two games at the Emirates.

Nasri IS leaving just for money, not for “ambition”, if his choices are United and City and his motivation is “ambition”, there’s only one choice out of the two.

Cesc didn’t start a league game till the 3rd week of the league (Blackburn Away) and people doubted his professionalism then too.

They blasted him for yelling at refs and showing passion saying it’s a prove he doesn’t want to be here and at the same time criticized him for not being the vocal leader Arsenal need.

He might drag his injury till September 1st. but as long as he’s an Arsenal player, he’ll give his all, and his all gives us a chance at the title.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:13 am146Glennw

Jhlf,
admirable attendance but as I’ve done the same & more since 78 all totally irrelavent. I’ve never been to a game feeling miserable, feeling like I didn’t want to be there, what’s the point of that? Though I admit I come across plenty like that at every game, seemingly intent on spreading their misery to all around them, I just don’t get that sort of attitude and personally I just wish they would all fuck off and leave those that want to support our club to do so
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:27 am147Stingy Voyageur

Hey cheers H2H @63,

Despite the current rankings, both Brasil and Argy have been consistently ranked extremely highly for at least the last decade. They are not in the top four currently but anybody that watches footy knows they are much better than the current number four

Anyways, the original point is that the Copa is a major continental championship just like the Euros are (which you took offence to). I did not say that this year’s version was a viewing spectacle. And I rate it as a very near par to the Euros. It is a far better competition imho than the Asian, African, or North American counterparts.

And 9/19 is pretty close to 50%
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:31 am148Snir Geuli

I just finished reading today’s Arseblog and Arseblogger wrote something that is quite interesting.

He talks about the fact that we can’t replace Cesc with a Cesc type signing cause there isn’t another Cesc in the world but maybe the replacement would be different than what people.

It’s obvious that when Cesc isn’t on the pitch we struggle to create chances, so maybe by adding a lot of creative players he’s dividing the creative burden around.

Mata, Arshavin and Gervinho all had double digit assist record and with Jack, Aaron and the Greedy Frenchman we might have 6 players who can make the final pass instead of one.

Although Cesc is the best it does look at times that when he plays the players pass the ball to Cesc and just wait to see what he’ll do with it.

By dividing that burden between the front five we might be on to something. The balance in our attacking play would benefit a whole lot from that.

I’m actually quite surprised this hasn’t been talked about as much as it should.

(And just to make it clear, I still want Cesc to stay, even if it means our attack isn’t balanced )
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:33 am149Stingy Voyageur

And my footy show tells me there are currently four SA nations in the top 11. Not bad for a continent with far fewer nations than Europe.

Also, the top two players of the 1900s eminate from that continent. As well as the current number one. It’s actually quite shocking you don’t see SA as an equal to Europe. Hell, in WC cycles not too long removed I considered them clearly superior (from a NT perspective).
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:39 am150True Storey

Morning ‘Holic & ‘Holics,

Some interesting exchanges up there. A few ‘replies’….

Glennw, good to see you back in the bar. Are you ready to expertly guide the HT Mk II yet??? Don’t care where it came from, that joke at #79 was brilliant. FOYS. Enjoy the action at the weekend and great to hear of 2 new young Gooners coming through the ranks. You have done your duty, now it’s up to the club.

Trev @ #81, still posting from lovely Devon mate? Couldn’t agree more with your comments. I’m going to make myself believe that everything you have written is just conjecture but the current results and status of our ‘very active spree in the summer transfer market’ are not living up to my aspirations but they are matching my expectations if you get my drift. SSFM indeed. IG will have major egg on his face if our business is done and/or if we make just one or two Squillaci-like signings. BTW, I have it on good authority that IPA was feeling like a burst couch all day yesterday, nursing a monster hangover and a very sore bum as a result of the goings-on at Lady N’s reception for the Septics*. He might just report in later if he recovers the ability to type and sit at the same time. He’s beside himself that he couldn’t respond to PHW in a timely manner

Steve T @ #117, another set of comments that my heart doesn’t want to agree with with but my brain is making my head nod up and down. *takes ‘Holic’s medicine and starts to flick through L.Cohen albums*

Clive, hang on in there mate. Just two weeks to go. Try to steer clear of the spatula polish, MM and the Ladyboy Gooner massive. Sausage and ring donuts indeed

Lars re: “pass-the-parcel”. Possibly a good way to describe the way we’re dealing with the responsibility of strengthening our squad?

Wolfgang @ #71. Bravo. Now get back to work, DL Ltd. is notorioulsy short-staffed in the summer. Prof TES kindly requests that you put some trousers on though. JCs OK

* With apologies to all of our fine American ‘Holics. I’m just a Limey b’stard and couldn’t resist a little faux pas. Didn’t mean it. I celebrate July 4th, President’s Day, Halloween and everything
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:41 am151True Storey

Snir @ #148,

Foolish as this may sound, my money’s on Cesc staying although I don’t think we’ll see him play until early September if the injury stories are to be believed.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:44 am152Stingy Voyageur

Snir – It’s not me saying “Cesc who?”. It’s Barça. They’ve got this Thiago kid who they didn’t let go of (unlike Cesc). He was also the MVP of the UEFA U23s which Cesc never was. To FCB, Cesc is an expensive luxury. They don’t need him. They’ve got Thiago to cover Xavi, Afellay to cover Iniesta, and your favourite sMasch to cover Busquets. They don’t need Cesc. That’s the point. Therefore, they can drive down the price. They can wait. And Cesc is the loyal homing pigeon. He will return. For a wage reduction if it came to that. I believe this to be true and I’m not trying to blow smoke up your ass
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:52 am153Clive Waterman,[ Gooner since 54 ]

TS @ 150
Only 3 more sleeps to go.!!
Only cloud on the horizon,the Deviants were at it again with the sausages and donuts at breakfast this morning.!!
The lovely C is still nowhere to be seen,she cannot still be being interrogated by the Inspector,i sincerely hope he has kept his truncheon in his trousers.!!
Cheers
clive
on 28 Jul 2011 at 9:55 am154Stingy Voyageur

Snir,

We generally agree on the Italians ultra conservatism and playing with three DMFs. However, after last year’s performance, you’ve got to admit YaYa is more dynamic than we all thought and he played as an attacking MF. That was his role last year and he did it well.

I believe Nasri if he says he is moving for silver. We all know he wants the cabbage too. We all would if we were in his shoes. After all, a man’s gotta feed his family. Citeh won silver last year and we haven’t since he’s been here. He wants to win too. And the days are counting down on United owning that city. Citeh will surpass them soon. And I hope they do. As long as both are behind us I’ll be happy.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:09 am155iLars

So, SV, because Barca don’t really want him we should sell him on the cheap? Then we should tell them that we don’t really want Messi, now can we get him for £10m?

Storey, not so sure about the PTP comparison – seems that there are no presents at all in our parcel

Off to enjoy the sunshine, it’s hot as hell here today. Think I might have to have a beer or two during the day – it’s important to drink when it’s hot, I’ve been told.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:11 am156True Storey

Clive @ #153

Aah zose French hommes (even the Clouseau types) are tres persuasive when it comes to sweet talkin’ ze women into zings zey may regrette plus tard. C’est la vie. But maybe, just maybe The VC prefers a good old Cumberland sausage rather than a petit saucisse, non?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:14 am157True Storey

Heh Lars, enjoy!

Actually, the ether is awash with ‘imminent’ Arsenal deals at the mo’ esp. Mata. Maybe my money on Cesc staying is looking even more foolish? I’d be delighted to dine on my words regarding transfer activity. I still think Samba is a smokescreen BTW….
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:16 am158Glennw

TS,
thankyou, it’s good to be back although from afar as still on our hols, but back for weekend. Ready to go on ht mk2 but request drink driving rules are relaxed a little, well relaxed alot actually! Glad you liked joke, made me laugh just writing it
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:22 am159Stingy Voyageur

Mr. Lars on vacation,

I subscribe to your drinking philosophy during hot and humid times. Remember to hydrate often. Also, put on some sunscreen. We don’t want your fine Scandanavian skin to end up like a tomato.

One team market. The boy wants to return (right of return — no, that’s political). Point is, FCB has the leverage. They don’t have to pay what we are asking and they won’t. I think too many on here believe he’s worth 50m. That’s never going to happen. They won’t even pay what they last offered us last year. And if Cesc plays like he did last year his value will keep declining as his contract nears completion. I’m not saying sell him for cheap. I’m saying Arsene is in a very tight spot.

And the Messi analogy is totally irrelevent. He has no desire to come here, no history with the club, and no speaka’ da English. Si?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:22 am160Snir Geuli

SV – Yaya Toure is no Attacking midfielder. If we make the AFC analogy he’s more Wilshere than a Cesc in their formation and his skills.

About Cesc? I agree that Barca don’t need him, but I do not for a moment agree that Thiago is better/a better prospect.

About Nasri? Feed his family!? Are you serious?! City’s offer was 2M more than United’s bid (in wages). If he wants trophies and has those two options, there’s only one choice to make.

I’ve told you this before but he was quoted saying we were the best team with the best players (therefore – ambition for trophies) last season and should have won the league. He decided on leaving before any team improved, thus making us still “the best team with the best players”.

He only wants money, flog his greedy ass. He might have gotten a trophy if he and the rest of this so called “mentally strong” squad would have won their home fixtures, not anything more, just the home ones against lesser teams.

115K a week my arse.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:31 am161Camberwell Gooner

According to UpItsOwnArse365.com, Alexis Sanchez has been unveiled at B-arse-alona, apparently coming out with this gem in his first ever presser:

“Obviously I would like to play with Cesc.”

Farca and Sanchez: a match made in heaven, or in other words, a club full of big-mouthed gobshites signing a – yes, you guessed it – big-mouthed gobshite.

I hope he gets sent off in the CL semi-final for looking at the ref the wrong way. Silly me, of course that won’t happen, it would make it more difficult for UEFA’s Chosen Club to get to the final. Which must always happen, every year. Otherwise, what would all the hacks and hangers-on and plastic fans do with all that jizz they save up on a yearly basis?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:39 am162Snir Geuli

And one last thing – “And if Cesc plays like he did last year his value will keep declining as his contract nears.”

Would you please stop with that? He had a good season by normal people’s standards and an OK season by his standards because he barely played!

36 (29+7) Apps, 17 assists, 9 Goals.

The only thing I’d agree with is that his value would decline due to his contract nearing its end and not his play.

And in today’s market Cesc is worth 60M, the fact we’re “reportedly” approving a 40M (were it to arrive) is a testament to the club realizing it’s a one club market.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:41 am163Snir Geuli

SV – Have a look at my 53 comment, it might change your thinking.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:46 am164True Storey

Glennw

On behalf of DL Ltd I am pleased to confirm that all HT Mk II staff have to sip at least a pint of our water before boarding. Could it be more relaxed?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:50 am165Snir Geuli

TS – Maybe your money on Cesc won’t go to waste, have a look at this…

http://www.goal.com/en/news/10/italy/2011/07/28/2594219/cesc-fabregas-is-not-an-ac-milan-target-and-i-think-hell

Now that’s different news than what we’re used to
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:51 am166True Storey

Sg @ #145

“Money wins trophies? In most cases but not all the time. The

The Invincibles had:
Lehman who wasn’t a big money buy.
Lauren 7.2M.
Campbell came on a free.
Kolo Toure was acquired for 150K!
Ashley Cole HG
Patrick 3.5M
Gilberto 4.5M
Bobby 6M
Freddie 3M
DB 7.5M
Titi 11M.”

Nice one.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 10:55 am167True Storey

Snir,

IF (underlined, red letters, etc) Galliani is accurate (and I hope he is) then that might suggest that AW is seeking to bring in players like Mata to spread the so-called creative burden (don’t like that word) and to demonstrate added ambition in terms of bringing home the silver.

To many ifs, buts and maybes for me but I love the story
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:04 am168behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: Lars @155, yes yes, drinking when it’s hot is very good medicine; drs c and z will confirm this.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:36 am169Catalan Gunner

Morning all. No time to catch up, but Cheers, Holic, for the Alan Smith tackle the other day. The full version was better as you had the build up – Smith planting his studs into Nigel. A bit of push and shove from the Arsenal boys, and then the absolute inevitability of what happened the next time Smith got the ball. Followed by Tony standing over the writhing figure “a la Keane” as the ref futily waved a yellow at his back.

Lovely stuff… gives me a warm tingling sensation just thinking about it. A bit like the one that I’m getting from all the transfer rumours today. Just rumours, I know……

A pint for all….
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:38 am170Ollie

What’s going on here?

I have unearthed an old photo of Arsène.

http://pmcdn.priceminister.com/photo/848306267.jpg

Drinks for all.
I see iLars was about so I take it his tab is still running?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:45 am171behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Ollie, Great photo. Maybe he should revive the bow tie? Drinks on Lars, no matter whether it’s hot or cold where you are.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:52 am172Trev

Snir @ 145 – great post. The only word of “advice” I would offer you, and only for the sake of your health, is not to get too stressed over FCB and their “insulting” offers.

Yes, I hate them too, but let’s imagine we’ve gone to an auction. Any auction. We have a painting we value at £1,000. If their is only one bidder in the room and he doesn’t fancy paying more then £50, he will, unfortunately, bid £50.

It’s then up to us to sell to the lone bidder, or have a reserve on the painting, and not sell at all.

Seems like that is exactly what is happening, and it ain’t gonna change.

So don’t over-stress mate. Great post at @150 tho’.

TS – good to see you back. Yes still in Devon – ’til next Weds.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:54 am173Trev

Oops @172 – Their = there.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:56 am174Trev

Blimey! Sorry Snir – meant to re-affirm your @145 post.

TS – your’s was the great @150 –

Must be all the sun yesterday. Coat !!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:56 am175zicoinexile

8 ball @ 168

Confirmed.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 11:59 am176True Storey

Cheers Trev. Hope the sun’s shining in Devon. it is in Herts
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:00 pm177Catalan Gunner

8 ball @ 168

Confirmed.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:11 pm178takeabowson

Clive@127 – Great stuff , and will pass on your thanks to Wolfie . I look forward to hearing how the break out goes .

H2H @130 – more good stuff and thanks for the advert . Bloody Mary waiting for you on the Bar , when you’re about .

Harsha and Snir – Kudos to you for setting the record straight about who made Fabregas the player he is and his still mostly very good performances in what was for him a less than stellar year .

Glennw@146 – Well said Sir .

TS@150 – Trashed on a school night ? Good work fella . Will pass on your sartorial advice to Wolfie – he should be alright with it as long as he can keep his speedoes on underneath .

Ollie @170 – Great pic even at that age , he has a knowing look about him
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:14 pm179takeabowson

Dr Z , Dr C , and Trev , morning , didn’t see you all there . Drinks all round – must keep Lars hydrated .
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:16 pm180Charlie

‘Silly me, of course that won’t happen, it would make it more difficult for UEFA’s Chosen Club to get to the final. Which must always happen, every year.’

I must have imagined 2007, 2008 and 2010…

Though if UEFA are helping Barcelona win a few European Cups I don’t mind too much, they’ve saved us from Man Utd and Chelsea carving it up between them in recent years!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:18 pm181Snir Geuli

Trev – As funny as it may seem, today’s arseblog has actually calmed me down.

The thought of balancing the attack in the squad with 6 different players who could make a final pass is reassuring (yes, I know we have them now as well, but now they seem to pass to Cesc and wait and look hopeless when Cesc’s injured).

I know exactly what you mean, but just like I told SV – In today’s market Cesc is worth (at least) 60M, the fact that it’s being reported that we’ll approve a bid of 40M means the club realize it’s a one club market.

El Mundo Deportivo has just written that Barca has other targets if Cesc doesn’t sign. That’s the first time Iv’e seen them writing anything else than “Cesc will move to Barca in 48 hours” or something of that sort.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:19 pm182Trev

Tabs – cheers, morning coffee for me, old boy. Have one yourself
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:52 pm183Camberwell Gooner

Charlie @ 180, I was exaggerating, simply because the thought of those horrendous cunts winning, as they usually do with a little help from their friends the refs, is anathema to me.

Of course it’s no better if the Chavs or the Deeply Indebted do it, but God’s Gift To Fooball (TM) have a happy knack of taking odiousness to previously-unseen levels.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 12:52 pm184True Storey

tabs @ #178,

It was IPA who was the burst couch, I was a very busy boy yesterday

Prof TES cares not what WS wears or keeps in his trousers

Pint o’ cooking lager please to get me in the mood for a bit of footie followed by a cuzza toninght. Cheers!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:00 pm185takeabowson

Ah TS I see , apologies , slow on the uptake here one pint of cooking lager coming up .

Trev – here’s your coffee . Didn’t realise sunny Devon was in a different time zone Lunchtime here , so I’ll have a pint . Cheers .
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:19 pm186Charlie

Camberwell – I’m not crazy about Barcelona off the pitch, but on the pitch I think they’re fantastic and I’d take them being successful over the gruesome twosome from the Premiership any day of the week. Anyone who mentions gamesmanship, no team in football can cast the first stone where that’s concerned.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:20 pm187True Storey

tabs @ #179

Forgot to say, Lars has been supplied with DL Ltd water to keep him thoroughly hydrated. He was last seen hugging bears in the woods which is quite a thing as I don’t think Swedish woods have any bears in them???!!!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:26 pm188True Storey

According to Blogs, Bendy is now on his way…

http://news.arseblog.com/index.php/2011/07/sporting-to-unveil-bendtner-on-saturday/

If true, Best of British to The Great Dane.

About time we announced someone in now isn’t it? The Mata story is full of BS and contradiction in the usual rubbish feeds.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:32 pm189takeabowson

TS @187
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:37 pm190Camberwell Gooner

Charlie, fair point, but there is a third way.

The squads of all three could just be taken out back and unceremoniously shot. Simples.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:46 pm191True Storey

Er… unable to post?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:48 pm192True Storey

Testing
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:49 pm193True Storey

Mmm….

According to Blogs our Great Dane is away. If true, Best of British Nik and thanks for all the goals.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:50 pm194True Storey

Holic,

It appears that I cannot post links. Is this a new security feature or just something screwy with my laptop?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 1:53 pm195Holloway2Holland

*sips B. Mary supplied by tabs* Aaaaaaah, that hit the spot, cheers.

Some good stuff above, like the invincables price tag post, highly inlightening.

Charlie, apology accepted, sir.

SV, for the last time, because I’m getting the feeling that I’m pissing in the wind here. All I commented on was the standard of this years Copa, that’s it, end of, basta.

I’ll be back in a bit, I have to change my shoes….. They seem to smell of pee.

Next round’s on me.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:00 pm196True Storey

Heh H2H! We’ve all been there…. well I know I have
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:05 pm197Ollie

Test for TS :

http://viewyonder.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/ostrich_head-232×300.jpg
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:05 pm198takeabowson

My pleasure H2H .

Looks like it’s just you TS

http://news.arseblog.com/index.php/2011/07/sporting-to-unveil-bendtner-on-saturday/
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:11 pm199takeabowson

Don’t know why it’s awaiting moderation !!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:12 pm200Goonerholic

Me either, but it was

You are supposed to be allowed to post up to 3 links.

It must be “arseblog” it thinks is dodgy
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:16 pm201Ollie

heh ‘holic @ 200 (and congrats on reaching that milestone for the day)
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:16 pm202takeabowson

Definitely their fault ‘Holic
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:17 pm203Holloway2Holland

I always thought Bendy had it in him to be a good player, last season, when given a chance, I feel he was played out of position.

I wish him all the best.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:20 pm204zicoinexile

I quite like the idea of Nik going abroad rather than another English club, because I am fairly sure that played in the right position he will do a half decent job (albeit he will still miss a barrow load of sitters!).

I’ll have a Deuchars IPA please barman, to settle nicely on top of their cousins, sunk last night with the great BtM
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:22 pm205takeabowson

Heavy night Dr Z ?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:22 pm206True Storey

OK, cheers fellas

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2019788/Nicklas-Bendtner-set-Sporting-Lisbon-transfer.html
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:23 pm207True Storey

Yup, must’ve been the ‘Blogs filter’ ‘Holic. That’ll please him
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:25 pm208True Storey

Ah-ha, twas the big neet oot last night!

Tell us more Dr. z and congrats for being able to type today. You are clearly made of far sterner stuff than IPA
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:27 pm209True Storey

Ollie @ #197

Was that a baby picture of Crouch?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:27 pm210zicoinexile

Not really, just a good old fashioned blether*, and putting the (Arsenal) world to rights

* chinwag to you southerners
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:29 pm211True Storey

If we’re on the ‘when they were young’ theme, here WHUFC’s new manager as a pup:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/20/science/20walrus.html
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:33 pm212takeabowson
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:35 pm213Dr Feelgood

Internal Memo – Delirious Locomotives Ltd:
————————————————

From: Doctor Feelgood

To. All Happy Train Staff

________________________

Subject: Dress Code

Dear All

Please remember that swimwear and high heeled shoes are very much liable to result in a disciplinary hearing (with the exception of the Swedish ladies dispensing drinks).
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:37 pm214Holloway2Holland

@209 TS’ Heh.

I always thought Crouchy looked more like this though;
http://southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com/shared/characters/kids/timmy.jpg
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:41 pm215Prof TES

DF

Did you run that one past our delinquent legal team too? I fear Wolfgang may have access to some rather good lawyers after his daring escape from Malaysia and his raid on the SU.

Edwin
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:41 pm216takeabowson

Dr Feelgood @213 , Worry ye not , already made arrangements to drop him off at Finsbury Lido on match days

H2H
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:41 pm217Prof TES

Timmeh!!!
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:42 pm218zicoinexile

211 and 214
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:42 pm219Ollie

TS, I had totally utterly forgotten (did I even know?) that he was their manager now.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:44 pm220zicoinexile

Professor, I think a disciplinary hearing on the HT is really just listening to the legal team arguing over who has first dibs on the medicine.

tabs, I knew we could rely on you to “take precautions”.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:49 pm221Holloway2Holland

Ollie.

He turned down Chelsea, IOU, Real, Barca and both Milans as that would be “too easy” for him.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1312931/Sam-Allardyce-Id-win-league-year-I-Manchester-United-boss.html
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:51 pm222behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Perhaps the HT legal team can tackle this assignment: define the difference between medical marijuana and medicinal marijuana, by purchasing samples of same, smoking and comparing their medical and/or medicinal benefits. Results to be submitted immediately upon completion of testing.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:53 pm223True Storey

Ollie @ #219

I have a mate who’s a Hammer. He’s actually quite pleased about it given the last incumbent.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:55 pm224zicoinexile

That assignment won’t lack for subscribers Nas.

DLL legal team on the other hand have difficulty deciding which hand to write with.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:58 pm225takeabowson

Grant sacked for partying too hard i heard .

Nas – Tests completed . Conclusion , both good .
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:04 pm226Holloway2Holland

While we’re on the subject of deluded managers;

Stoke manager Tony Pulis has tipped his new centre-back Jonathan Woodgate, 31, for an England recall.”

If by recall, he means that it has to go back to the factory because it’s faulty, then for once I agree with him.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:34 pm227True Storey

‘Grant sacked for partying too hard’

‘If by recall, he means that it has to go back to the factory because it’s faulty, then for once I agree with him.’

You’re on form today gentlemen

Extra drinkypoos for yous two.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:53 pm228Holloway2Holland

This keeper makes Mad Jens look totally sane, what a peanut butter;

\http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0m07K6vLVw
on 28 Jul 2011 at 3:55 pm229Holloway2Holland

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0m07K6vLVw
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:04 pm230behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Re: H2H: He may be demented but has good technique.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:05 pm231behind the 8 ball but not nasri

The Kung Fu Keeper, that is, not H2H, who may also have good technique.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:08 pm232Holloway2Holland

I have a good Tecnic’s (turntable) but that’s about it, I’m afraid.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:11 pm233behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Let’s say Rooney, Terry, Gerrard or Giggs did that. They would get three game suspensions. Any other player in the league would be locked away.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:15 pm234behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Add Owen and Lampard to the 3 game suspension list. Maybe a few others?
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:25 pm235Holloway2Holland

I read on another site that he’ s being charged with attempted murder. Can’t argue with that imho.

A 3 game suspension for Owen is tantamount to banning him for the whole season
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:39 pm236True Storey

Soemthing familiar sounding about this match???

http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/loan-watch-denilson-sent-off-for-sao-paulo
on 28 Jul 2011 at 4:50 pm237Holloway2Holland

Let’s hope he’s taken that particular hoodoo with him, TS.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 5:42 pm238Harsha

Big Nick to Sporting? Wish him luck there..

He probably would have made a decent centre half

Right, I’m back home and I’ve got the day off tomorrow

I’ll have a shot of Jameson’s, on Lars’ tab please

*Pulls up chair*
on 28 Jul 2011 at 5:53 pm239True Storey

Harsha, your suggestion at least as sensible as making him a winger
on 28 Jul 2011 at 7:24 pm240behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Bendtner signing with Sporting is tantamount to a guarantee that we will be facing that club in Europe within the next two years, and that he will score at least one goal against us. This dynamic has hardly ever failed to work before, am I not correct? I think it has something to do with FIFA officials pulling the strings but can’t be exactly sure.
on 28 Jul 2011 at 7:59 pm241behind the 8 ball but not nasri

Can you take this “Boca” club seriously with a name like that (“mouth” in Spanish)? The derivation is obscure but seems to relate to one of the following two scenarios, either: 1) The club’s early defenders chattered a lot, using their mouths to coordinate the defense; or 2) Obscene. Cannot be mentioned in a decent and proper web site such as Goonerholic.