Going Over Old Ground
Jan 18th, 2012 by 'holic
A strange week is this. A pretty widespread post-mortem has been taking place and that is understandable given our last two Premier League results. I must firstly thank all who have contributed to a most enjoyable debate in the drinks. The arguments have taken a more acidic turn in some other places, and again that is not entirely unexpected.
I think most angles have been covered, so all I am going to add at this juncture is that I don’t think there is a massive disagreement that we should be looking to maximise our chances of a Champions League qualifying berth, and few seem to argue that to give ourselves the best chance of achieving that requires some degree of turnover of playing staff in the next thirteen days.
Can we persuade clubs to take our ‘disposable assets’, for that is what our out-of-favour players are? Are there players available out there of sufficient quality who are available for us to recruit and who want to come to us? I see names bandied around but I haven’t seen a quality left-back move anywhere yet, nor any of the goalscorers we were linked with. In fact the market at the top end has only really kicked off this week with the transfers of Cahill and Cisse.
Am I as sceptical as some who take Arsene at face value when he says we will not be buying in January? Probably not. I have no doubt if the pieces fell into place we would see movement. How many times do you have to be told how close to our chest we hold our cards at times like this. I will accept though it would be unfortunate were we not to act in this window should the opportunity present itself.
May The Fourth Not Be With Us
I will repeat one of my concerns. People continue to talk of fourth place as an achievement this season given all that has happened, and it would, but I don’t want us to be outside the top three automatic qualifying places in a year when the Euros will deplete our squad come the time of the qualifying round at the start of next season.
Anybody care to recall our inability to seal any deals until we knew the outcome of this year’s qualifier with Udinese a week before the window closed, and what happened to us in the Premier League as a result?
The Daily Star Ate My Hamster
I am staggered in the extreme that two sentences from the Chairman have been turned into a back page that has provoked such hysterical reaction. The timing of their publication is quite interesting, given that I am pretty sure that those words were uttered a year or three back now.
I’m surprised so many intelligent people appear to have opened wide and swallowed that.
*Ducks for cover*
304 Responses to “Going Over Old Ground”
First!
Weehee! My first first in a long while π
What has the chairman said? I have been pretty much disconnected from reality for a large part of the day for various reasons.
But then again, the Daily Star has rather little to do with reality, come to think of it.
The whole thing Lars.
ARSENAL missing out on the Champions League would not be a disaster, chairman Peter Hill-Wood insisted last night.
In an honest assessment of the Gunnersβ position β fifth, four points behind Chelsea β Hill-Wood said: βWe are hanging on in there, no more.β
The north Londoners have made it into the Champions League in each of Arsene Wengerβs full seasons in charge.
Arsenal host champions Manchester United on Sunday knowing they cannot afford to lose any more ground on Chelsea.
Hill-Wood said: βFrom a financial point of view, not qualifying for the Champions League is quite a blow.
βWe have been planning for not qualifying every year, so it is not a disaster, but it would be nice if we could.β
Arsenal slumped to their seventh league defeat at Swansea on Sunday and could drop to seventh if results donβt go their way.
Nice piece Holic .
Agree with you completely on the PHW comments . All he did was indulge in a bit of “stating the bleeding obvious” !
You’re probably right – the comments have probably been rehashed anyway . I have it on good authority that Uncle Pete has been out Llama-hunting , and is far too busy to comment on anything Arsenal at the mo. π
As regards the difficulties of finishing fourth , I’m afraid that if you offered me 4th now , I would be inclined to take it .
Seeing as we’re on a Detox , I’ll have a glass of Sancerre please , and whatever you and the usual suspects want .
How they missed their ‘club in crisis’ stories, eh?
A bit baffled by recent results, transfer inactivities (I think blogs raised salient points a day or two ago).
Evening all.
Since you put your card behind the bar at opening time, Lars, I think this whole session will be on you :p
All hail the wallet!
I don’t think I’ve had a drop of alcohol in January yet.
Oh yes, just a very minor drop of whisky following bathgooner’s recipe to appease my cough (which is not yet completely gone).
Still waiting for the first completely healthy day of 2012, mind.
Well, that wasn’t much, was it? It’s not exactly a revolutionary revelation that missing out on CL money is a blow to any club that isn’t propped up by bottomless chests of oil/gas money.
And I forgot to say that you have a very good point about the fourth spot. And maybe, just maybe, it would be better to finish fifth? In that case we will at least know where we are and we won’t have that added insecurity of waiting for players waiting to see if we qualify. Getting a quick “no thanks” will at least enable us to move on and focus on the next target.
Am I clutching at straws here? Maybe I am. But we did see Tottenham managing to retain all their good players despite missing out last season, and they only had one CL season behind them.
It’s not a deliberate voluntary ‘detox’, just work and no home Arsenal games at weekends.
Ollie, all sessions in this bar are on me by default!
Well played ‘holic
reckon the club will act in the transfer window if they can too – but it’s true, it’s who/from where? And they’d have to fit straight in – that’s a long way from easy.
Hellollie.
Fuck me I really do have a diabolical thirst now…
…and get well soon, Ollie.
@ 3 As tabs said, it was ever thus on the Happy Train….
I have been pretty much disconnected from reality for a large part of the day
When did I last see you, ‘holic? Was it the Everton game?
I feel sorry that I won’t be there early on sunday.
Oh, on the ‘cool things’ to note, at least one of the guys from customer this week (Kenyans) is a Gooner π
heh Dr Z. I have been largely disconnected from reality for a large part of last week.
Stupid working days stupid working hours.
All this for a job that I will have to give up on, with no gratitude received from the company.
Still, I think I’ve agreed with the boss to take next monday off without officially taking next monday off.
After all, I worked saturday and sunday ‘for free’ again…
Bah, at least I seem to be doing a good job.
zico@14: heh π
Ollie,
Don’t let the bastards grind you down…..work is serially over-rated.
Mondays too, now that you mention it.
Just tuned into Spanish c****s versus other Spanish c****s. Still hate seeing Cesc in that strip….
Poor choice of words from PHW: ‘We have been planning for finishing below 4th for years’ That damn Wenger though… Sooner we’re rid the better.
Of Hill-Wood that is
Funnily enough, Dr Z, I’ve just switched the telly off, to avoid the temptation to start watching that cuntfest.
Re: transfer window.
I still find it strange, to say the least, that we don’t seem to have learnt anything from the last few seasons, or indeed this pre season’s shananigans.
The injury situation at Arsenal can only be seen as ‘on going’, surely?
Someone will always be out.
Although Sagna might be back soon, looks like Jenkinson is out for most of whats left of the season. So no cover there unless Johan is your cup of tea.
Santos might be back soon too, but Gibbs? Well, I feel sorry for the lad, but even if he is back he’s hardly likely to be at peak sharpness. So no cover again.
And we could analyse almost every position in the same way.
Anyone know how it works with the squad? I mean it appears from pravda that we have 36 players in the first team listings, yet it’s obvious that a few like Vito NB52 Frimps and a few others are out on loan.
I mean, I’m asking how many spare squad places do we actually have?
I’m sorry, I’m watching it and hoping Ba*ca get smashed.
Pepe already got an arm to the face and Pique’s walknig on the proverbial tightrope for discipline, decent watch.
‘takes cover’
Classico is like watching a bunch of diasies falling all over the place with minimum contact. pathetic.
I think I just came up with a formula to beat Barca.
MtS@22; clubs are allowed an unlimited number of under-21s in an EPL squad to supplement the 25 limit.
The PHW story seems to be the red tops beating up something from even less than nothing than usual. Hasn’t Gazidis said the same thing earlier? And wouldn’t the club’s management be totally irresponsible if it didn’t have contingency plans for missing a season’s worth of CL money? Shows how mad the game has become if you get lambasted for saying you are doing something sensible.
Clive@305 previous: Where was the Burroughs Sports Fields? Was it off Prothero Gardens, the field that the Northern Line went underneath? If it was ’64, that was the year the English Schools Championship was held at Copthall.
Evening All!
Ollie – Hope you’re in improved shape come Sunday. Not to worry though. Watching you and ‘Holic sup your way through carrot juice cocktails and crunching on celery sticks whilst the rest of us down the odd pint or three will warm the cockles of my heart in the knowledge that you’re both drinking your way back to health and fitness. tabs may even be tempted to smoke cigarettes with filters to help you in your endeavours. A caring lot us ‘Holics π
*ducks for cover with ‘Holic*
MtS: We are using the under-21 list extensively: Coquelin, Frimpong, Jenkinson, Miquel, the Ox, Ramsey, Woj and Jack are just some of the first teamers that aren’t in our named EPL squad.
We actually have three open slots for homegrown players as a result though we have filled our quota of up to 17 non-home grown players. Not sure where Thierry fits in as he is not included in the list of 17, but perhaps loan players are exempt.
So if we are to buy a star striker, he will have to been playing in England or Wales from an early age, or, we’ll have to unload someone to open up a spot, if we are buying from abroad.
What Lars @ 3..and Dr. Z @ 14 said regarding reality…
I am stoking up my pipe in readiness to re-read Lars’ first para @ 366 in the last set of drinks. I am not sure yet but it could be a classic brain twister..but I will tackle it after a few tokes of the old peace pipe..
Snir: wtf! Are you going to cough up or not?! Or you just being provocative as usual…
Dear me Pepe is a clown. Its is really embarassing this game, players rolling over the floor
GT – Sorry, was watching the game on fullscreen!!
I tweeted zonalmarking.com with a request to write a guest piece on that matter for them, we’ll see what he says… lol π
Anyway, in a nutshell, it’s beat your man 1v1 and advance the ball while going through the first line of pressing.
Barca players are great at closing down but they are not defenders by nature and can be beaten by a technical player.
Once you go through the first line of pressing it is a lot easier to get to a get position in their half (half a look at our second goal, that’s a classic way to bypass their high pressing).
Since Iniesta, Xavi, Messi, Cesc et al are not defenders by nature but rather great at closing down it is not impossible to go past them when a technical players runs at his defender. Once you beat a player, a different player will come and close you down, leaving the beaten player behind and freeing up more space that has been freed by the player coming towards you.
Barca’s closing down is very impressive but I can’t help but think that Real is making it easy for Barca by not trying to run at defenders. Ronaldo has repeatedly passed backwards when faced up against Dani Alves, as has Altintop when faced up against Iniesta.
As for how to defend against them, this might sound naive and old-fashioned but man to man would be the best option since Real’s pressing high up the pitch is great but inconsistent as it exhausts them and makes it rather useless in the 60th minute (have a look at the last Classico to see a perfect example of it).
A man to man pressing would make sure players are kept fresh and not running on empty after 60.
True, Messi, Iniesta and Alexis are capable of beating any player 1v1 but in the case that it happens you should condense the play and make the pitch so narrow that Barca, being Barca will pass it backwards and start over, allowing you to go back to your marking assignments.
Snir…Hmmm I think that I will fire up the pipe now…I am sure it will help to untangle my brain (0;
Have just caught up with the back drinks… If Carlsberg made back drinks… quite probably the best back drinks i’ve had the pleasure of reading.
Drinks for GT Ned Snir TaBs et al that contributed… on Lars tab of course π
So we appear to be agreed that AW has taken risks in recent years that haven’t paid off? No shit sherlock.
I can live with that though. He certainly has a dogmatic side to his character, one that I agree with too.
But can it be allowed to continue?
Cue Geoff i think (who will be able to put it across better than me)
Cheers ned for the squad clarification.
Can’t help but feel that a very public pursuit of a major name player would give the club a lift. At the very least we would be seen to be doing ‘something’, even if we didn’t land him.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/jan/18/jack-wilshere-return-arsenal-ankle
Some interesting tidbits in this Guardian piece by Louise Taylor, including an assertion that outside a small elite, most Prem players are of similar standard. Implication: you end up with much the same whether you under pay or overpay. Also, some background about Leon Britton, the Swansea player pulling the strings in midfield last Sunday, who apparently was an Arsenal Academy player at one point. http://gu.com/p/34n3j
http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/transfer-news/Arsenal-transfer-gossip-Marouane-Chamakh-says-is-staying-despite-interest-from-Italy-and-France-article855114.html
Snir, I’m loving it (the link @ 35) π
He won’t be coming back to solve and cure all our problems and ills, but its good that soon we’ll be seeing him on our screens playing in the heart of the midfield, not supporting the team from the crowd or from home with the rest of us.
Jack back in the starting line-up will be good for the club, adding more stability and playing confidence to the first 11 ‘thumbs up’
Wind – I rate LJW so highly that I think he’s gonna take us to at least the semi-finals of the CL.
He will be one of the 5 best players in the world 3 years from now.
Does anyone know when Sky release the televised fixtures for March?
not comfortable doing the naming thingy ‘cos it’s too easy to leave other fine contributors out (and anyway it goes without saying that most on here are quality – so the naming thingy can feel a bit self-regarding when done sloppily by the likes of me) . BUT as i started over the page and as i’ve done proper back-drinking now would also like to doff my england over-21 cap in the direction of Ned, Snir, Steve T, Lars, Joe, Zico et al for handling such a potentially messy cyber subject with a class The Arse deserves.
And to anyone i may have missed out – GO F**K A CORNER-FLAG … THAT WAS A JOKE – you know, messing about with the class thing etc.
If i missed anyone out i’m sorry AND i promise – myself especially – not to try to name a whole bunch of ‘holics again.
You’re all (writing this in best pseudo luvvy “Toto” gush way) wonderful, precious. decent human beings (not you Feelgood) who are tres fortunate – like me – to have found the mighty Arse, as the Arse is fortunate that you found them/it (CMC medication kicks in and am starting to swoon pre collapsing – breathless over keyboard)
Somewhere Over The Rainbow Weigh A Pie!
http://youtu.be/PSZxmZmBfnU
Up The Arse!
psed that reminds me – i trust all is well with H2H – another one among the many fine contributors on here whose views are always worth a read – he doesn’t seem to have been around during these recentish trickyish times
Nice piece. I must admit that I agree re AW not letting on. I take with a pinch of salt almost everything that is said in the window weeks. Most of it is not even speculation. It is just complete fabrication.
We all know we need to strengthen and we all know where. Only the next 2 weeks will tell us if we get our wishes.
Snir @ 32: OK after a couple of pipes (one it turns out wasn’t enough) and a little snooze I feel able to address your revolutionary tactics to beat Barca. Tell me if I got the gist of what you said:
The way to beat Barca is to have more technical players with the skill (ability) to beat them 1 v 1 by running fearlessly at them, beating
not only their first set of pressing players, but also the second set as well…because – as you said – once you get through their defensive forwards and midfield, they have a crappy defense! Have I got this right?…
Barman…please pass this pipe to Snir…take as long as you need mate while I think this over…(0;
Big match this weekend for obvious reasons. We have to get the three points to jumpstart our effort for fourth. Unfortunately, I don’t think were going to sign anyone. I think Wenger thinks he has enough players coming back to fill the void. Right or wrong its going to be an incredible ride the rest of the way.
By the way, Sunday’s game will be shown in the US on Fox making it the first PL game shown live on regular TV in the US, ever. I’m hoping we put on a great show for all those that don’t know about the beautiful game……really hoping to convert GedoDad into a supporter so I have someone outside of this fine establishment to share this great club with. COYR!!!!!
GT – I didn’t say they have a crappy defense.
I said that due to their high pressing, once you go through the first two lines of pressing (forwards, wingers and midfielders), the back four is so high up the pitch that you are left in a great opportunity to score.
Have a look at AA’s goal from last season, that is the perfect example of what I mean. Kos won the ball from Messi, passed it to NB who passed it to LJW who instantly passed it to Cesc who then passed it to Nasri.
Once we got through that first initial pressure Barca apply after losing the ball, it put us in a great position to score.
By beating the defender you create space which isn’t created otherwise, on the contrary – Barca’s pressing technique is so suffocating that you feel forced to pass it back to the keeper.
If you beat your defender, another Barca player will approach you, leaving space for you to exploit.
For instance, had Ronaldo tried to go past Alves (he most certainly didn’t), Pique would have tried to close Ronaldo down leaving Benzema with space. If Benzema gets the ball and Puyol tries to close him down then that leaves Higuain in space and all this because you beat one defender.
If you don’t take the defender on, you will find yourself passing it backwards to your keeper until he hoofs it and if you lose the flick on then you lose possession for at least 5 minutes, cause that’s how long Barca are gonna keep possession π
Poison Lasagna is the only thing that will beat Barcelona…
don’y you hate those barca players; so much talent but whinging diving and generally cheating whenever possible. it is interesting that cesc is as bad as any of them – to the fore whenever there is trouble. what is in their water ?
I heard Barca so called players drink nothing but the tears of orphans through red and blue straws
And just like that a half-century was achieved.
With all well in the kingdom CoR continued studying kanji…
http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard-sport/football/article-24028856-double-boost-for-arsenal.do
Hoorah @ 51.
COYG
So who vacates the place in the starting 11 IM49 or JD20 ?
http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/296614/Thierry-Henry-s-Manchester-United-hopes-rely-on-test-run-/
The scan didn’t reveal any serious damage to the calf.
Arteta is said to be struggling. He hasn’t trained all week and didn’t come out for training yesterday (Wednesday).
The game will also be too soon for Bac.
So back four will likely be JD, BFG, Kos, TV.
I hope Henry can start in place of Arteta with Ox in AA’s place but that’s just my wishes, don’t really see it happening.
For some reason AA gets unlimited amount of credit from the manager.
Nice link at 51 Snir, helps me think less about my current ‘soaked’ condition in this London weather, lovely as usual π
Snir. From memory sky normally publish their chosen fixtures in the second half of the season about a month beforehand. It is a real pain in the arse.
I see Real Madrid lost again in the end π
They are the Spurs of Spain. (Barça are only Man U)
i hate barca @ 48 – And what else is new?
Their play-acting is so despicable it makes you want to support Real Madrid (seriously).
You obviously missed the game, Camberwell. Pepe was the worst of two teams packed full of hideous cheating, diving, play-acting cunts. That game was just theatre, a horror show, and the body of football was the victim.
If they’re going to let uncertainty over CL qualifying affect their approach to transfers, as they did this summer, it is an incredibly short sighted and short term way of doing things.
I know the quality of player you can attract is supposedly lessened if you don’t qualify, but we’ve hardly been taking the best apples off the tree when we HAVE got there, have we?
You buy players for the next four years, not one. They should have a list of targets and go and get them, CL or no CL. Spurs have hung on to their players despite having no CL, when it seemed everyone was going to take Modric, van der Vaart and Bale away and look what’s happened to them.
They simply cannot be better off than us financially, debt repayment or no, yet they cope and they are getting stronger while we fade away.
I know there’s an issue regarding putting money into the club when neither Usmanov or Kroenke are majority shareholders, but if we can’t plan for the future thanks to CL uncertainty, with two multi billionaires owning two thirds of the club, we are well and truly screwed.
Where is the bloody ambition?
I meant to say own the club outright, not majority shareholders. I forgot just how much of the club Kroenke owns.
The third paragraph is the cat’s claws down the blackboard bit, ‘R. Cannot argue with it. Them keeping Ratboy while we lost Cesc said a great deal.
Morning ‘Holics
Camberwell @ #58 – Thanks for the kind words in the previous drinks. Unfortunately, Holic’s words re ‘El Farcico’ @ #59 are spot on. Almost made me forget our current trials and tribulations with our beloved Arsenal. Seriously, how can anyone in their right mind want Maureen to replace Arsene? There’s only so much I think we should do in pursuit of shiny, silver cups.
For anyone who is interested, I thought this was a reasonable piece by John Cross today. A bit sensationalist (remember the target audience) and needs to be taken with a pinch of salt and in the context of The Barman’s words “How many times do you have to be told how close to our chest we hold our cards at times like this?” Just my opinion, of course…
CoR @ #49 – FACT!!!!!
Poorly Ollie @ #57 – So…. are you suggesting that The Premiership title race is between Manure & LWCs this year? π
AL @ #42 – I believe H2H is involved in a bit of business.
Ricey @ #60 – FYI, Kroenke is Arsenal’s majority shareholder. He has a controlling stake of more than 60 per cent in AFC’s parent holding company. My personal opinion is that his ultimate ambition is purely to turn a profit, after all he is first and foremost an investor. However, from the little that he has said, I also think he intends to keep his stake in the club for at least the medium term (3-5 years). Therein, may lie some of our continued issues but I’m not ready to grab my pitchfork just yet π
Protein and vitamin shakes all round please Mr.Barman. No more water…
Opps, sorry Ricey, you self-corrected before I posted π³
…. And yes, your third paragraph re: LWCs really grates. Very good point, I thought.
GAH!
Here’s that link to John Cross’ article for anyone who is interested. Try to avoid looking at the picture of Shrek (pre-rug) if you are feeling queasy:
http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opinion/columnists/john-cross/The-Arsenal-column-by-John-Cross-Why-Arsene-Wenger-s-stubborn-refusal-to-spend-his-35m-kitty-could-cripple-the-club-article855111.html
Holic @62
I agree with the sentiment, but we all know that Cesc leaving was a pretty unique situation – as much about going home as football.
Interesting how he is behaving as badly as the others. It is just accepted over here (generally) as being fair enough if you can get away with it, and being “clever”.
Apparently in a Spanish Thesaurus “clever” = “cunt” π
Camberwell – here you go, for your viewing pleasure!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65D7qcd5u7Y
Apparently, to their credit, the Bernebau fans whistled him off when he was substituted…..
Good run down Holic!
You would think we would strengthen already rather depleted squad, however as it has been covered from all angles here in the drinks I don’t believe we will buy anyone in this transfer window. Somehow I believe Wenger is awaiting our new like signings to come back from injury.
CG @67 Love that Spanish dictionary π
Great clip Dr.C @ #68. They’re a really ‘clever’ bunch, aren’t they…
TS…. it is nauseating.
When I say anything I just get blank looks… “but we are the best team”. Oh, that’s all ok then. Go ahead and be clever……. π
Catalan, it really has gone too far in Spain. Maybe it is generally more accepted there, I don’t know, but that was just atrocious.
Ricey, it’s not the club that chooses who to go after depending on wether we qualify or not, it’s the players that won’t say yes or no until they know where we are. In that respect it might (note: might) actually be easier to not be in the CL at all than having to qualify.
TS: it is entirely possible that Cross has a few points in that article, but I just can’t see past the sensationalist cliches.
Bloody Hell
Rumour that UTD not happy with Wellbeck wanting 60k/week….. we could match that, surely??
Sturridge not happy at Chelsea….
Please Mr Wenger, pretty please with cherries on top…???? π
Afternoon All ,
TS @27 – Always a filter man me ! On Sunday I shall be utilising my shiny black long-stemmed cigarette holder , which I think will lend a certain elegance to the wide brimmed hat , Speedoes and Jimmy Choos combo that I am planning .
Snir @39 – Nice to see those crystal balls of yours are working even before the draw for the quarters !!!
And i’m not really sure about the wisdom of citing one of the best goals scored at the Ems as a “blueprint” . I veer towards GoonerTerry’s methods . π
Glad I didn’t watch the Spanish showdown from the sounds of it . Mr C @67 heh π
Lars @72 – Looks like after the Diarra “incident” we’re back on track ! π
Couldn’t see any redeeming features in that John Cross article (sorry TS π ) . Met John Cross at the Arseblog book launch . He was charming and clearly a knowledgeable and committed supporter . I will therefore give him the benefit of the doubt and say that the article says more about the Organ he works for than it does about him . Same old tired bollocks pandering to the hysterical as far as I’m concerned .
I am always astounded at the amount of bookings given in La Liga. Sometimes I see seven booking on one side and five on the other – but I rarely see many sending offs.
tabs, we are definitely back on track π
Blimey
Just youtubed Joel Campbell’s goal against Nancy at the weekend.
Now that was how to finish. Still, he’s for years to come. As is Afobe.
The Scene : Executive Carriage Happy Train MkII
The atmosphere in the room is somewhat subdued, with an arduous leg of this yearβs journey imminent on Sunday. Professor Storey is counting, Wolfgang is filing (nails), Dr Spin is deep in thought and Dr Disorder is deeply unconscious.
Dr Feelgood is holding court…….
Feelgood : β…….so, in essence what they all appear to be saying is we donβt have sufficient strength in depth…..we need an infusion of new blood.β
Edwin : βThe problem, Dr F, is that every year the punters rush to us and part with their hard-earned and they expect at some point to see it re-invested in the service….some are even starting to sing the infamous song.β
Feelgood : βLet me guess. Slip, Siding Away β Paul Simon?.β
Edwin (rolling his eyes) : βErm, no. Its simply βspend some fucking moneyβ. Repeatedly. They have been somewhat disappointed by our most recent appointment (points at Dr Disorder) β he doesnβt actually DO anything. β
Feelgood : βYeah, I know. They want new faces. Itβs a squad game….blah blah blah. Wait till I introduce them to Lance.β
Edwin (suddenly interested) : βWhatβs this?β
Feelgood : βWell heβs only our new Head of Security. Has a pathological hatred of the Cocks up the road and is meaner than a snake.β
Edwin : βSo the search has finally ended. I hope he knows what heβs in for. When does he start?β
Feelgood : βIn about 5 minutes.
At that point the telephone rings, and startled, Dr Disorder awakes and picks up the receiver.
Dr Disorder : βHello? 2 Jagerbombs please. What…..?β
Edwin snatches the phone from his hands and says βProfessor Storey here β who is this?β
There is a long pause as Edwin listens to the reply and then says βOK, send him in.β
Momentarily the door opens and standing before them is Carlos. Looking more psychotic than ever.
Feelgood : βYou? Whereβs Lance?β
Carlos : βThat will be me. Lans.β
To be continued…..
Trying to write a fantastically tedious article about the legal pros and cons of cohab versus the tried and tested formula of marriage . Have thought about concluding with an assertion that we would all be better off sticking to Llamas but fear that that oblique reference to Behind The Arse would no doubt be lost on what undoubtedly will be a niche readership .
Bored , bored , bored …
Top Five Sports books ?
1. The Life And Times of Muhammed Ali – Thomas Hauser .
2. Fever Pitch – Nick Hornby .
3. A Strange Kind of Glory – Eamonn Dunphy .
4. The Damned United – David Peace .
5. The Fight – Norman Mailer .
Anybody else got any suggestions ? Need a good read .
Said I needed a good read , and as if on cue , up pops a Feelgood chapter . Lovely ! Now off to read it … π
Dr Z – heh , brilliant π π
Phew , you had me worried for a moment there , thought Carlos had been given the tin tac ! π
Heh Dr F. And heh again.
Have to admit to not really getting the pun at the end of #78… π³
Like a new signing !
Sorry Lars – its not an edwinism but an arsenalism
Like a new signing
Lars
Try saying “Lance” in a Scottish accent, rather than an English one π
Ah the ever alert Wolfie – he may be quietly filing his nails but his mind is ever working π
And Dr C knows.
Ever thus , Dear boy , ever thus … π
Tabs@79:
The Boys of Summer by Roger Kahn
The Miracle of Castel di Sangro by Joe McGuiness
TaBS,
So Paddy Got Up
Just saying’ like.
And the book about Robin Friday.
Tabs @ 79 The Road by Cormac McCarthy.
Just read the John Cross article. Substitute Arsenal for Wenger and I think it talks a lot of sense. There are many that sit by me who have voiced similar concerns. Goes back to the discussions a few days ago.
CG @ 77 the boy looks a fantastic prospect – in fact he’s more than a prospect all ready – he’s a prospect plus, and a bit – imo. It’s been posted here before so you’ve probably seen it – but it cheers me up every time i take a gander
It’s J.C. (for ’tis he) giving some 0f those cheating el classicko c@nts the run around afore he bangs in another sweetly struck left-footed beauty. El capitan of club and country – Puyol’s dive/scream combo at about 3.20 is hilarious and effin’ shameful at the same time. Somewhere over the rainbow would love to see players post-match have to explain some of this sort of lark to the press/public
Reporter: We’ve got a clip here of you, world-cup winning captain, screaming like a spoilt 3 year old, whose just had his sweeties nicked off him, in an attempt to get an opponent – who was giving you the run around – sent off. Do you have anything to say about that?
Puyol: Er – yes i’m a cheatin’ el classicko c@nt – but what are you gonna do about it? Next question
http://youtu.be/wa1n9YbyF-M
And TS thanks for the H2H update – At times it’s a bit too easy to forget we all have lives out The Arse – oops!
zico: aah, l.a.n.s… should have got that one π
Gets the ball and brings it down the right-hand side of the pitch…
…crowd rises in anticipation as the Winger looks for someone to pass it to…
calls for it out on the right whinge!
Not that it is in anyway relevant, but it’s snowing here.
One day, must tell you Holics about the time the snowgates were closed and we were locked in for 3 days in the Bridge of Orchy hotel…..
IN?
Well done, Lester!
pffft – feels like nowt but a small consolation at the mo – nevertheless ta to the rest of the team for making it poss
‘Ere a lot happened whilst i was typing 94 – El Classico Feelgood Dr.Z
And tabs on the book front there’s wee cracker called
“Kicked Into Touch” it’s the real life memoir of Fred Ayre – former pro and lower league manager. Written in ’81 it’s a real eye-opener as regards the way clubs were run just before this uber-professional age kicked in. If memory serves i think he manages citeh for a bit – to fairly disasterous affect. Anyway, it very funny
More recently Barney Ronay’s (him of the unending similie who writes the funny bits for The Guardian i think) The Manager is a decent read. Think there’s a whole chapter on AW
cheers Larsene – have one on me for change
“a”
Cheers for the suggestions all .
Ned , they both sound good , though from purely personal taste I’m guessing I’ll enjoy the Italian football one more than the Baseball one . As someone who knows naff all about Baseball , would it be possible to enjoy the book with that level of ignorance of the Sport itself ?
Abb – Thank you . Seen the film , which I know cannot be compared to the book . I’m guessing it wouldn’t be a particularly cheery read !
Holic – Sorry for the omission !!!! As for Robin Friday , have to confess to never having heard of him . However a quick squint at Wikipedia tells me that not only did he have a penchant for table-dancing , but that he was sent off for booting Mark Lawrenson in the face , and then proceeded to take a sh*t in Lawrenson’s kit bag , once back in the changing room . I like him already ! π
AL – Cheers mate , will look those up, the first one especially sounds like my cup of char .
Whoops @105 was me .
Tabs – that was my point. It doesn’t matter who we get in the quarters (pretty sure we’re beating Milan especially after Prince got injured, he is currently one of their best players. Never rated him when he was in the PL though) cause Jack will lead us to victory. He is THAT good.
As for the blueprint – GT didn’t really give an alternative way to play against them so at the moment you’re just sceptical but didn’t offer any alternative!
And why shouldn’t that goal be a blueprint?
tabs, I am astonished that you have never heard of Robin Friday.
A kindred spirit of the HT Executive, if ever there was one.
The greatest footballer we never saw indeed.
Snir ,
I hope you’re right .
As for your last para , and in answer to your question , because that goal was extraordinary , exceptional , out of this world , and the special cannot be used as a barometer for the norm .
That move would have broken down 49 times out of 50 . It was remarkable . That is why , other than giving us victory , it is so cherished . It was a goal of aesthetic beauty .
Dr Z – I am indeed shamed !
Happy Train material.
Because Robin Friday played life in the same way he played football. Off the field he ran riot in Reading. He smoked spliff, dropped pills, drank heavily and accommodated every woman that came his way. If George Best was football’s first pop star, Robin was the game’s first rock star. Friday’s off-field activities gained such potency that visiting scouts from top clubs β and there were many β refused to countenance signing a man of such unpredictable actions.
One of our number saw him, zico. Further, one of our number used to drink with him in the Spreadeagle opposite Reading’s old Elm Park ground – before games in which he played. His greatest goal came the night Reading beat Tranmere, 4-1 I think. Even the referee just stood there and applauded. Great night, great days, great fella, but an even worse influence than Ollie π
HAHAHAHAHAH do you really think this rabble will secure fourth we are more likely talking about 6th or 7 th.This will be the final straw when Wengers failures crash and burn.
Oh look, the special school has just ended for the day…
Tabs, I’m referring to that goal as a concept.
You can go past the first two lines of pressing in many ways, that’s one of them, but its a great example of it.
You don’t need to copy the goal, just make sure you go through their first two lines of pressing.
Real managed to do that yesterday at 83:04 but spurned the chance.
Guvnor, @ 112 you must tell me more at the Blackburn game.
Snir , I respect your opinion . I have already posted mine !
Dodgy lasagne . π
Dr Z , Holic – I lived in Reading for 3 years between 83 and 86 , sadly after Robin’s time , but was amused to read that he did his famed “elephant” dance at the Sindlesham Mill Nightclub . That was a regular hang-out of ours and I have to say , I saw a lot worse in there than a bloke getting his trouser snake out on the dance floor ! π
Guess a place like Reading needs a bit of livening up π
Not wrong there Dr Z π
Thanks to all those that posted comments back about JC’s Arsenal Column. I did pre-empt it with a bunch of caveats and yes tabs, he also struck me as a very nice chap that night at the Blogs book launch.
Hej Lars – Don’t forget ALANS too – Almost LANS. I think Blogs copywrighted that one last season.
Dr.z – More great extracts from The Feelgood Diaries. They’ve become more topical than a topical thing. Edwin’s getting a bit grumpy these days…. so even more topical π
Wolfie – JCs, Speedos, a long cigarette holder and a hat nicked form The Quangle-Wangle? Have you been consulting with Gok Kwan again?
tabs – Sindlesham Mill? Another club we’ve both been to. I used to work for a co. based in Reading in my late 20s. Elephant dance indeed! Which circles us nicely back to The Pink Elephant in Southgate. Small world.
Dr.C – Now Sturridge would be a great acquisition. BTW, I think Afobe might be a LANS as soon as next season but hopefully not, please Dennis, a stop-gap for a departing RVP *washes mouth out with soap and water*
AL – Well in!
Drinks gentlemen?
TS – Gok Kwan is my all time hero , apart from Mark Spitz . Cinzano Bianco please , with a brolly .
Coming right up Mr.Smallballs!
Well those Gooner customers seem to have left very very happy and even impressed.
I’ll pat myself on the back for once for a job well done.
End of the week should be more relaxing.
Well done Ollie . Are you back to full health ?
TS – The Pink Elephant and The Sindlesham Mill – many a fine night in those 2 establishments π
Heh tabs! Youth – wasted on the young π
With all due respect to Wind, Snir and any other young’uns on here.
zico @ #111 – Sign that f*cker up!
Evening all, finally got the tickets in the post this afternoon for my first trip to the ems on Sunday. This is one happy Gooner!
Practically, tabs. Throat just about tickling now. I think I’ll be perfect just for sunday.
Evening Ollie, could we stop discussing tickling throats. Diabolical is an adjective that does scant justice to my thirst for something stronger than a Sainsbury red label tea bag.
TaBS, I did the Mill a couple of times, but was more of a Cavershams man, or was it the Majestic by then? Nice spot in a town where you could find a lively night out if you wanted.
Don’t suppose you played any football or cricket in the area at that time? I may have
kicked fuck out ofmet you before πWill there be anything left in the Tollie by the time I arrive then, ‘holic? π
π
You have to account that I drink for two.
Yeah, me too. So that’s 4, right?
Oh.
Good to hear Ollie , and as for drinking for two we’d noticed ! π
Holic , both names ring a bell , the Majestic more so , but I’m afraid the old grey matter is failing me .
As regards football and cricket , I did play but only for the Uni . Didn’t play for any local clubs .
Actually I haven’t stopped coughing since I said I was better :s
I think it’s just the focus at work that keeps me from coughing during the day. Or maybe I don’t notice I cough.
I’ll sort you out with a couple of Marlboros on sunday Ollie – they should clear your passages π
Heh, thanks tabs
Tabs,
In no particular order, outside of βFever Pitchβ:
1. Stand up and Fight: When Munster beat the All Blacks β English.
2. A River Runs Through It β Maclean
3. Touching the Void β Simpson
4. Back from the Brink: The autobiography of Paul McGrath
5. A Good Walk Spoiled β Feinstein
tabs, on the tabs, dispensing tabs.
The man has his own Government Health Warning. (I should know). π
Cheers Joe , have read 3 and 5 , but will look the others up .
Dr Z – heh , surely not that bad π
Right off to watch Muhammed Ali give George Foreman a pasting over on ITV 4 !
I’m confused tae fuck noo, right enough.
Heh TaBS
– a Mr Wilde has been in touch, mentioning something about plagary…?
Where the hell are you going to put those ciggies to clear Ollie’s passages?
Ollie – If I were there I’d buy all 3 of you a pint. But I’m not, so Holic will have to do it for me (put it on my tab, I’m good for it…) π
Of course there are no full backs available to sign as cover.
http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/7442889/
What?
oh…….
NBN @ 26
All i remember is Dad taking me on the Bus from Whitefield where we lived,up the hill to Hendon.
The Burroughs was a very big area of Playing Fields surrounded by Houses.
I went back through Dad’s old Scrapbooks and it was according to his notes,The London Schools Athletics Championships,not English Schools Championships.It was also 1961 not 64.
My sister who was also a sprinter,ran many times at Copthall Fields,but from memory and Dad’s scrapbook, I never did.
I also played in 2 Cup Finals in 5 days in 1960 at The Burroughs,for Clitterhouse School.
We played the Schools Association Munro Shield final on the Saturday,we were the winners of the Southern League,and we played the winners of the Northern League and won 4-1.
On the following Thursday we played the Final of the Douglas Martin Cup and won 4-0.
We were the first School ever to win both Trophies in the same season.
According to the newspaper clipping Dad kept,Playing at the Burrroughs for a Schoolboy,was the equivalent of playing at Wembley.
Cheeers
The Sweeper.
Tabs, one of the best sporting books I have read is Friday Nights Lights. A true story of an American high school football team. What the school spends on the sport and what the kids put themselves through us unreal. Great read. A little dated but get it second hand on Amazon, you won’t be disappointed.
Thanks for the heads up on the Ali fight Tabs.
Thoroughly enjoyable.
Tabs
Not sure if you are only interested in Sporting Books,but if not,
then i can heartily recommend reading ‘ The Redbreast ‘ by Jo Nesbo a Norwegian author.
This was his first book translated into English.
If this gets you hooked you will want to read all his other Books,which are equally top notch.
I can also recoommend another brilliant writer Deon Meyer,a South African thriller writer.
First book,’ Dead Before Dying ‘, once you have read that, you won’t still till you have read his sequels.
Hope this helps
Cheers
The Sweeper.
Evening all,
Work has kept me from posting, although I’m sure that’s come as a relief to some π
Clive:
Amazing your dad kept a scap book, just about the best thing you can do for your children. Youth generally sees no worth in sentiment, yet a simple keepsake such as a childhood diary or address book can become almost priceless if discovered later in life.
The last sessions posts are epic, perhaps we should revisit them at the season’s end..
TaBS: Try a book called ‘Pedalling to Hawaii’ by Stevie Smith, publised by summersdale.
Quality, all of you….
I’m off to the land of slumber and nappies.
Lars’ tab. You know what to do with it…..
http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/news/Liverpool-feel-could-make-300million-over-six-years-from-new-kit-deal-with-Warrior-article855420.html
This is somewhere we have to improve.
I’m sorry Snir, but the best clubs in the world have the best sporting names associated with them, with the mighty Arsenal, Real Madrid, Man United, Ba*ca etc, you have Nike, Chelsea have Adidas, as do Bayern Munich, even the shitty LWCs have Puma which is frankly a cut above Warrior Sports/New Balance.
Liverpool are inviting their own demise by parting with Adidas as far as I’m concerned.
Great Feelgood Diaries @ 78 Zico and good assist at 99 for AL’s Cent, well in man π
Re: Sindlesham Mill.
Not far from me either. Don’t think there’s a nightclub attached to it anymore. It’s a best Western Hotel now.
Any of you ever do Perry’s in Wokingham?
Mr Wasp,
So the club that bought Armand Traore have now signed a left-back Milan are desperate to unload after just half a season.
You’re a clever chap. Work it out.
Wind – I didn’t mean Warrior or Liverpool in particular, but the fact that we nee to improve on our commercial deals.
I love our charismatic keeper WS but the more I observe his game, the more noticeable the need to work on his kicking distribution and clearance appears. He constantly puts the team under unnecessary pressure with his kicking and there have been a few occasions where this flaw has contributed to us conceding. He’s a very good goalkeeper who indubitably has the potential to become a club legend, however, at this stage of his career, his kicks hardly ever cross the halfway line. Just an observation for my fellow holics.
*half-line
http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/296831/Mikel-Arteta-set-to-sit-out-of-Manchester-United-game
TV also seems to be out..
This is too frustrating.
http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/team-news-vermaelen-arteta-henry-sagna
Sagna – Three weeks away.
Arteta – Out for Man U.
TV – Out for Man U.
TH – A doubt for Man U.
Gibbs – Three weeks away (is he even a footballer?).
Coquelin – Could be ready for Villa.
Santos – 2 months away.
Jacky – A few weeks away.
Carl Jenkinson – A few weeks away.
Fabianski is fit again.
This is ridiculous.
Clive@144: That may very well have been the sports field off Prothero Gardens then. It was just before the very top of the hill, and one end backed onto the Hendon Way. It was bigger than it is today, because the school that is there now hadn’t been built then (or perhaps everything seemed bigger then). Never played there, though. There must still have been the pond at the Burroughs then, and the horse trough and the conker trees going all the way up Hendon Way. Sounds as if you were quite the star sportsman. Nice to have those memories — and the scrapbook to help recall them.
BW@145: second your suggestion. Friday Night Lights is a great read, and the book is immeasurably better than the film.
Wind@152: Warrior Sports is owned by New Balance, the shoe company based in Boston in the U.S. Liverpool is owned by Fenway Sports Group, based in Boston in the U.S. Just saying’.
Impeccable1@156: have to disagree. Kicking is one area where Woj has really improved this season, to my mind. Last season, he couldn’t kick long. Now he can. He still has work to do on the accuracy of his long kicks, especially those to the flanks (and given our ariel prowess at the front the fewer long hoofs we have to contest the better, probably) but his short distribution is pretty good and his throwing is excellent.
SG@159: if you go to the English Premier League Injury Table, you’ll see that both us and ManU could field pretty useful teams of crocks.
http://www.physioroom.com/news/english_premier_league/epl_injury_table.php?SKEY=c0b42acffe11e6dd4dce9a48e9068f9e
I respect your opinion NBN @160, however, while I concur with you that his kicking distribution has improved drastically from last year, I think there is still room for improvement. I’ve noticed on numerous occasions this season where the ball is played back to him and his long kick is abject in terms of distance and direction. I’m by no means chastising him but I think it is an area where he could still use some improvement. I have no problems with his short distribution and throwing by the way.
Without Arteta this weekend, I hope Rosicky can do a job for us in the middle of the park. I expect to see a midfield of Song, Ramsey and Rosicky. I think Tomas hasn’t looked bad when he’s played this season. I also think Arsene could have made the Henry, Rosicky changes earlier in the Swansea game before they scored as the game was crying out for those 2 substitutions. I like Benayoun but he hasn’t impressed me when he has started games this season, therefore I think Tomas will get the nod this weekend.
Hoping for a victory. 1 – 0 to The Arsenal will do. Let’s go Gunners!!
Snir: I didn’t offer an alternative to your tactic for beating Barca because erm..I was stunned by the simplistically, simple beauty of it! Now where to find those players to execute those tactics with our budget…I know: Lets get Shaft to follow Brendan Rodgers about to find out where he is shopping these days (0;
So while I was in the Pharmacy this afternoon awaiting my prescription I decided to browse the magazine section: I picked up a mag about Body Building (down Wolfie..) and it turned out to be a special about the best Body Builders of all time….I opened the page to a quote attributed to Arnold Schwarzenegger”
“No one learns anything from winning. Strength comes from struggle. Its when you struggle and lose and then refuse to give in that you gain strength”
There you go Arsene, seems that we are on the right track then…Don’t give up!
@163: GT, Shaft would probably tell you that he shops at Asda but that’s a story for a different day when he’s less hungover π
Aw my good gawd – so that’s no defenders and thin in midfield then – and few alternative if things don’t go well up top – ermmm – ermmmmm – ermmmmmmm!!! Is BTM about? Or p’raps Dennis himself could have a word with the FGs who seem to have turned their backs on us again in recent weeks
A miracle please barman – large one, no ice – thanks
Hello all,
Haven’t been keeping tabs on the drinks that much as work has been a right pain in the cunt, but some nice stuff as usual from the regulars!
Dr Z, Heh @ the Lans pun
Snir, your formula is great but not quite revolutionary π
If players could take the risk of dribbling out of their own defence, Barca’s high-up-the-pitch-pressing would obviously be their own demise.
But the thing is, it is very very difficult to beat their pressing by running at them from the back because if you lose the ball, it’s a sure goal for them
Barca are so good because almost everyone in their team is at a different level in terms of technical level. And they have Messi
That’s not to discount the fact that almost everyone in their team are cunts, mind
Harsha – I didn’t mean dribbling from the back.
But after winning the ball you will most probably be in the middle third, passing it to the wings wouldn’t be as dangerous as dribbling from the back.
Pass it to the wings and beat the defenders.
You could see that Real tried it by giving the ball to Ronaldo every time they won the ball, but for some reason Ronaldo never tried to beat Alves. He got the ball, approached Alves, and then went backwards and passed it back, this was repeated until Barca eventually won the ball.
Harsha – As for “Barca are so good because almost everyone in their team is at a different level in terms of technical level. And they have Messi.”
Well – Messi to me is like Michael Jordan. You will be the best team as long as you have the best player in the game. That guy is absolutely ridiculous. You can have the perfect plan, lead 3-0 and still lose cause Messi decided it’s enough and he’s gonna go past everybody and score 4.
But as for technical level – I tend to disagree – There aren’t a lot of polished dribblers apart from Messi, Iniesta and Alexis.
In addtion, when given the option – Cesc, Xavi, Busquets etc. will always look for the pass and not to take their man on.
The “formula” I wrote is focusing more on attacking because it is a formula for teams that want to play attacking football against Barca.
If you don’t, then just emulate the small teams in Spain, like Getafe – Narrow the field with 10 men behind the ball and hope for the best.
By the way, man to man coverage (I wrote about it as the technique to close Barca down) proved itself against them as Kos marked Messi out of the game in the 2nd half last season at the Ems.
(First half Song was in charge of tracking Messi, but since he picked up a yellow, AW put Kos on man to man coverage on Messi, leading to Kos going to the halfway line at times, with Song dropping back to cover when Kos came out of position).
Morning has broken – anybody got a repair kit?
Looks like it’s going to be a busy day at work today, so I thought I’d better have a quick stop here first. Barman, something decidedly non-detoxic to get me started, please!
I cannot believe all the Hot Air being spouted on here about 2 Spanish teams that nobody gives a flying Fuck about.
Boring Boring Fucking boring.!!
This is an All things ARSENAL site,not a fucking referendum for Spanish football shit.
Jesus H Christ,haven’t we got enough to talk about with UTD coming at the w/end,and us with a hospital ward virtually full of our fucking players.!!
We should be discuussing how to beat those fucking bastards who put 8 goals past us in August.
Fuck everyone else.!!
Cheers
A very fired up Sweeper.
This would be a very different bar if it would only be about Arsenal.
That’s what makes it special.
The mention about Barca came because people here watched the game and we might be playing them in the CL so it won’t do any harm to discuss some tactical views.
Heh Lars @170! π
Now then Snir, you know better than to play with the old guard dog when he’s in mood like this,….. π
PS, The Sweeper – I presume the plastic baby Jesus was wrapped in an Arsenal scarf? π
‘Morning All
“…We should be discussing how to beat those fucking bastards who put 8 goals past us in August…”
I think The Fired Up Sweeper (T-FUS) makes a very good if feisty point.
Big disappointment if TV is out. He’s the type of player that can help carry us to a win. So… same back four as last week?
That’s twice this year that Manure will get to play us with half (or even less of) a squad in place. Perhaps a short-term loan for Bridge wasn’t such a bad idea after all.
Wasn’t it zico in the previous drinks that talked about the massive risks/gambles we seem to be taking with the squad?
I was feeling quietly confident about squeaking a win on Sunday esp. with TV back in the squad but I’m not quite so sure now. Will it take a tonking at home for the club to be stung again into some last minute transfer activity?
Jaysus, that’s three rants in a week from me *reaches for meds from CMC*
Thoughts on Sunday anyone?
A fired-up but a bit fed-up TS.
COYRRRs!!!
Feeling very smug.
Have actually remembered to change a few players on the GT Rollers – those on holiday in Africa, those who have been dead for a few months etc….
And very exciting, that gives us a radical 3-5-2 formation. Very continental, don’t you know?
We need it to – I see that that Polish chap ATG had a good week an leapfrogged us, but we’ll hold on to his coat tails and keep on gaining on Dr F (a spent force perhaps?) and those Boy Racers.
That’s my day done… off for a pipe.
….*dreaming of Europe*…..
Snir
By the way where the hell is Diaby?
Mr C
Catch me if you can π
Catalan @ 173
Re the BJ,
You would have to ask the 3 Musketeers about that,
Knowing them,the BJ probably wore a Red and White Dress with matching underwear,a little pair of Red shoes with a pair of white socks,and a Red handbag with matching nail polish.!!
Snir,
You are getting sidetracked,Barca may never happen,and is months away,let’s concentrate on how to beat the Mugmashers this week and then Villa in the Cup next week,One game at a time,not something that may never happen.
Cheers
A calmer Sweeper.
ATG
If the rumours are to be believed, Diaby is travelling the globe (M.East & US) seeing specialists, trying to fix his ankle and to save his football career. All unconfirmed, of course.
BJs Clive? And that’s from a calmer Sweeper! π
106 hours 20 minutes gone, 4 hours 55 mins to retox :-p
‘Holic
I hear the pubs in Swindon have taken delivery of an extra 10% of their normal quota of Guinness this weekend.
Can you confirm? π
Holic, given that you warned me about the detox, and then I of course, sensibly abstained, does that mean that I am 4:27 minutes away from Tox?
Sweeper @ 178
3 Muskateers?
Haven’t you heard the Feelgood Foundation mission statement? It goes something like……
All for one and all for Me
I’ve heard that we don’t actually need CL money to be (remain??)”competitive” – I’m sure Gazidis said this at the briefing in the close season and now PHW is saying the same (OK quoted in his favourite tabloid rag).
I assume that pronouncement is based on a further 6% increase in briefs for next season?
A lesson there for Feelgood in Freakonomics……
Dr F
As inscribed on the CMC door..
I can confirm that mission statement . No wages again from The Feelgood Foundation this month . So brassic , don’t even have enough money for some decent eyeliner π
Heh, Mr C.
Wolfie, your Czech’s in the post π
If we don’t need Champions League money to be competitive then surely having had it for the last 15 years we should now be market leaders????
I am with the sweeper. Bring it on. Up the Gunners. Fuck the rest.
Quite so Steve T.
How much do you think your Season Ticket will go up next season (a) if we DO qualify and (b) if we Don’t?
Genuinely curious.
a) I don’t know. No doubt there will be a rise.
b) I can’t honestly believe that Stab and the boys would be that stupid. There would be a mutiny.
Stan even…..
Zico @78 – π
‘Holic @ 154 – ouch! The Wasp is stung π
TV is out ? Really ?
I heard he was out, then doubtful, then in, and now out again.
Is this an injury update or has someone just been singing the hokey-kokey ?
Come to think of it, there’s one for Red Action to work on there –
You put your left back in
Your left back out
In, out, in, out
Shake it all about
You resign old Thierry
And you turn around
That’s what it’s all about.
Oh-h-h-h The Mighty Arsenal,
Oh-h-h-h The Mighty Arsenal
etc. etc. etc.
Continue ad infinitum with ‘right back’ and ‘left back’ verses.
Get your boots on Clive π
Mr C @142 – Mr Wilde can go do one ! π
BW , and Geoff – Thanks for the heads up , will look ’em up .
Clive @147 – Many thanks . I actually read very few sports books . Have always thought there was a dearth of well-written Sports tomes , but given the wealth of suggestions on these pages I was clearly mistaken . I do however read a lot of fiction . I am not familiar with either of the two authors you mention , so will try them out , and once again , thanks .
Joe @146 – My pleasure . The brilliance of Ali doesn’t dim with the passage of time does it ?!
Mark @153 – didn’t make it to Perrys I’m afraid .
Ned @161 – Would fancy our team of crocks to beat their team of crocks , not least cos we’ve got a keeper π
In all seriousness , throw The African Cup into the mix , and our team of injured and unavailable , whilst not world-beaters , is pretty darn useful .
Fabianski
Jenks Sagna Vermaelen Santos
Gerv , Arteta , Coq , Wilshire , Diaby .
Henry .
Sub Chamakh , Gibbs
TS @174 – Thoughts on sunday ? Finding it very difficult to be optimistic at this stage . The loss of Arteta is massive .
Trev @193 – heh π
GoonerTerry hit an exquisite diagonal cross-field pass – left to right – to Trev.
Charging upfield , fag in hand , turns to remonstrate with GoonerTerry , who quite sensibly ignored his run (walk) …
Trev turns – and falls to the ground with a twisted knee.
Well, may as well keep it realistic. . . . π
It’ll only be disallowed for offside anyway π
Lewin’s on, the only fit man left in the club, he shoots . . .
And collapses in exhausted celebration π
GoonerTerry picking his way through the walking dead…beats the first line of pressing defenders, and the second with a delightful through ball…
tabs, it really is quite bad when you can not only name a pretty good full starting XI of absentees but also have players left over to put on the bench…
I have to say I really have no idea what Sunday will be like. We have a lot of players missing but so have they. Yes, they won their last game but that was against a Bolton team that quite frankly looks more and more like almost every player has already given up on staying in the PL (though, of course, they will be massively up for it on Wednesday and they will all have the game of their lives…).
zico@185: it all depends on where we are to be competitive. If we want to compete around 7th-10th place then yes, we will be alright without the CL money…
Trev!!! FFS if you are going to muck about you can just FRO…10 points for guessing what FRO means….
So was that Lewin who shot@100? If not, then surely that must be a yellow for multiple self-assists!
You’re right Trev.
Apologies Wasp, sharpness of response overdone. Blame the soon to be over detox.
Agree we should not be going into Sunday with no left-back. There must be one available, somewhere, who has played some decent level of football lately?
GoonerTerry, you should have known better than to try the Barca-beating tactic in a competitive match without trying it in a friendly first…
Some serious self assisting there Trev !!
Having huffed and puffed all the way to the oppo’s penalty box , he finds that the goal has already been scored and that the attack clearly passed him by . Devoid of energy , and lacking any kind of mental strength , he spurns the opportunity to jog back to his own half , and calls for the stretcher … , and a lighter …
Brandishes imaginary yellow…
It was Lewin who scored, and you can stop waving Manciniesque cards around – i haven’t even ventured over the half-way line for weeks, while all you goal hangers have been glory hunting π
My 202 was obviously a slow motion replay as per the Italian tv stations during play that often misses the goal that follows such a play….(0;
Lars @ 207 π
Our resident playstation manager will be fuming π
‘Holic @ 206 – i quite liked the sharp riposte actually.
Too many nice guys around here. We need to man up and stop getting f*cking injured all the time.
And you, GoonerTerry, if I want to dribble through the defence and smash one in all on my own now and then, I f*cking well will.
10 points for guessing what that means !!!
π
Is that dissent @210 ? I think he’s risking an imaginary red … π
Too f*cking right it is. π
*departs in Balotellian fashion and disappears down the tunnel*
Trev…in all due respect you actually have to have possession of the ball before dribbling….spilling beer all over your jersey doesn’t count!
I want a stewards inquiry..
Trev, Balotellian fashion? You mean while struggling badly to put on a shirt? π
..and to think that I was happily singing his “hokey-kokey” song and loving it..tsk..what a cheater..
Lars heh..you got it! The cheater who can’t even take off his own beer soaked jersey…ha!
@212 Zico – now I’m being mocked?? *surprised face*
Disappointing…
Scene: Dressing room after a rather disastrous training session. Coach Waterman bangs on the table to get everyone’s attention:
Coach: Trev what the fuck was that?! Play like that on Sunday and 8-2 will be a fucking result I can tell you
(Trev still struggling with his jersey does not respond)
GT: Coach, how many balls are we allowed on the pitch?
Coach: That reminds me – wtf??? you can’t just put another ball into play as and when you feel like..
(Trev having at last freed himself from his jersey…now seems pre-occupied with his under-shirt)
Colin: ..and Trev I hardly call having the ball bounce off my head my scoring…I am the physio FFS! Why did you kick the ball directly at me?
(Trev finally giving up with the shirt starts ripping it from his body)
Coach: Jeeezus H Christ..he’s gone stark raving mad. Doc please put his under sedation…another one out for Sunday. We’re fucked!
…to be continued
I’ve got to admit I do kind of like Balotelli’s complete and utter lunacy!
Not since Cantona has there been someone quite so arrogant. The headed goal on the goal line followed by lack of celebration….. nutter.
GoonerTerry , heh π
One small correction , however . Clive is the bloody sweeper , not the coach !!!
Our coach is Arsene Wenger ! Keep up Dear boy π
I don’t remember the last time I felt this uneasy before a match, wait, it comes back to me, August the 28th. π
No Arteta, probably no Verminator or Highbury King, not feeling too confident about this one anymore I have to say.
‘Hoping and Praying’
With you Mr C . I can’t help but smile every time I watch Balotelli .
Completely bonkers .
Snir,
I forgot you were omniscient,
Consider my wrists well and truly smacked.
It’s all in jest mate – have a beer on my tab (which is a subsidiary account of the Swede’s) π
Balotelli is the funniest player in all of European football.
His off the field antics make me crack up every single time!!
Zico – I usually get a pint of Carling but since we’re eliminated from that I’ll take a London Pride! π
TABs @ 223: Can you actually see inside my head? Do I tell you what colour Speedos Wolfie can or cannot wear? And if you think that Arsene Wenger would coach our lamentable team you are deluded mate…now where did I put that Wintergreen,,
Clive now they are talking about fucking Shitty players! Time for another blast I think (0;
Hah! Feist and aggression all round. Splendid, if temporary, change from the usual civilised tones of the bar.
GT – Steward isn’t in the least bit interested in making any inquiries. he can FRO as well π
Trev – F*cking well right on! I’ll see your Balotellian tunnel strop and raise you a Na$riesque don’t pull me off again boss (down Wolfie) foot stamp. Loved the AFC Hokey-Kokey by the way.
tabs @ #194 – Ta for the feedback. Arteta is a massive f*cking loss as is the continued absence of TV.
So, to continue the punchy mood, I think we need to play it very dirty on Sunday. Here’s my Plan B:
Get Song to kick anyone over 30 in the Manure squad firmly and squarely in the nuts at every opportunity. Draft in Keown (ALANS) to scream at the entire Manure midfield in the tunnel pre-match standing no more than 3 inches from their faces whilst Arshavin runs around pulling all their shorts down so that even Benayoun can then push them all over causing untold ankle knacks and knee strains before they get to the pitch. Ricey can lace SAF’s chewing gum with Senokot drops and whilst the 4th official isn’t looking Arsene can creep up on Brian Kidd and slap him hard across each cheek. Finally, our BFG, wearing a commemorative pair of Nike jackboots, should attempt to pick Shrek up by his rug and when the lot comes off in his hand he should go down like a sack of spuds, holding his arm claiming that he was attacked by a small, furry creature smuggled onto the pitch by Nani and then wave an imagnary deportation card at the ref.
What’s Plan A? Fight like tigers (regardless of ability) and play the f*ckers off the park like our lives depended on it.
Anyone got a better set of plans?
For those that haven’t seen it . A nice little summary of our finances , care of a link from Blogs .
I think we can all argue about the wisdom of spending the budget on enormous wedges of cash for unproven youth , – ( I would argue that there is always an inherent risk when paying for potential , and those that bemoan the enormous wages paid to Denilson , Bendtner et al , would be the first to moan had we lost Wilshire , Schez et al as a result of lower wages ) – but I do feel the article does nail , in a very concise way , the misconception that we have a war chest of untold millions to spend , ( at least without going into more debt ) .
http://angryofislington.com/2012/01/19/arsenals-finances-the-plain-truth/
no
The “no” was to that Feisty fucker TS.
Just in case you were confused.
And what if you were? Want to make something of it??
I’m off to watch some Withnail….
TS great plan. In addition I would have a few Pizzas on standby for half time..(0;
F*ckin’ heh! GT & Mr.C
“What f*cker said that?”
TS – Prefer plan B to plan A !
GoonerTerry @228
To answer your questions in order :-
1. Of course I can . I am omnipotent .
2. No-one , and I mean no-one , tells Wolfie what colour Speedoes to wear . Speedoes are his life .
3. Of course AW is our coach . ( See Episode 7 Behind The Arse π )
It’s F*ckin’ Feisty Friday F*ckers!
Afternoon Holics
What a depressing Friday afternoon, not only has it been tipping it down with rain all day, here in darkest NW Norfolk but I have just caught up with the injury news from the training ground.
It strikes me that we are in the same position,if not worse, as the OT debacle. We need some divine intervention and accompanying faith healers if we are going to get anything from the weekend’s encounter.
Someone, please give me something positive to look forward to.
I shall need more than tea in my flask at the Ems on Sunday!
As always COYRs
It’s F*ckin’ Feisty Friday ‘Holics! π
*waits for a soft yellow or a harsh red card from The Barman*
TS@ 230 Just love it! I can see the chaos unfolding now…
Tabs @ 231:
“……misconception that we have a war chest”……and not only that, but highlights the truly simplistic mathematics the media and many fans adapt when taking aim at the management of the club.
I hadn’t seen the entire “Rumble in the Jungle” before, apart from the clips in “When we were Kings”. And tonight I’ll be tuning into the “Thrilla in Manilla”. Something more pure and honest about the quality of the boxing and integrity of the sport back then……..and of course the magic of the great man himself.
Dear TS
“I have a heart condition”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVFavnzXK9Q
Hurricane, your education continues…
Delia @238 ,
Something positive to look forward to ?
The “Thrilla in Manila” is on ITV4 tonight . This can be taped and enjoyed after a night out experiencing that “friday feeling” in the juicer .
Beyond that I’m struggling π
B*ggering thanks abb!
Oh, the revered Delia of Block 112 is here….
*bravery and feist drains along with the colour from his cheeks*
I hope my tone does not offend Delia, it’s been a helluva week and Arsenal are doing their best to turn my grey hairs white. I am happy to donate my hipflask on Sunday to help solve your hot tea conundrum.
*skulks away, tail tucked firmly between his legs (down Wolfie)*
Indeed Joe , couldn’t agree more .
Delia, Something positive. Well the bar is open 24/7. We’re playing at home. And our lads are looking forward to punishing them big-time.
Mr. C @ #242 π
tabs @ #236 – We need to get TGLM involved somehow in Plan B. Hardinso Endit for Evra? π
Wind @ 224, Can you replace Theo. After all you’ve got great pace and your delivery is always spot on!
110 hours done.
1 3/4 hours to go.
I can taste it …
Holic, Tabs, Zico, and Dr. C This song is for you. ‘ Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha goona do, when they come for youuuu!’
give ’em a kicking
..then scurry off and point at Snowy. It was him, it was him….
‘Holic @ 249, I’m not sure whether that’s a good or bad sign maestro π
abb @ 248, its up to the boss, what can I do? π
Mr C @ 242, the hurricane acknowledges, the hurricane receives, the hurricane goes to continue his studies with your link π
TABs @ 231: I like that angry guy…seems pretty level-headed to me. But he has one or two dumb fuckwit posters though – I hope they don’t find out about Goonerholic. Security please close that door!!
TABs @ 236: Ok then..take a look at this finger I am holding and tell me what I am thinking if you can really read my mind…go on then!
…I am really loving this Fiesty F*cking Friday thing or FFF as the authorities like to call it..(0;
er TABs: remember that I have a heart condition & high blood pressure OK?
*chuckles at Trev’s goal*
Interesting topic touched on today by Le Boss: http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/-under-21-competition-could-replace-reserves-
I totally agree with the idea of an U-21 League but I would keep the Reserves League as well. Our problem is that in seeking to expose our exceptional youth squad to a higher level of play we have promoted them early to the U-18 and Reserves squads. But with a first team of what – 39 players? – our fringe players and players coming back from injuries are not getting enough match practice. The U-21 League could solve that problem but only if we retained the Reserve League as well..
Comments?
*checks the coast is clear*
GT @ #258 – Not f*ckin’ feisty enough mate! π
The Eagle has landed π
GT@ 256 Just watch your sodium and sugar intake. Sugar causes inflammation in the blood vessels. Don’t know why everything we enjoy is so bad for us, well not everything, thank god. Cheers mate!
Enjoy Mr Barman π
TS: you can come out mate..Its only me & you in here right now. Trev is still sedated and TABs is swatting up on his Book of Subtle Insults to come back at me later..
Another interesting quote from Le Boss about Sunday’s game:
“We are highly focused and motivated to win our game and hopefully we will have some people available who are today still doubtful. What is important is our determination and focus and that we are ready to give everything to win it.β
“…and hopefully we will have some people available who are today still doubtful”…Me thinks a little mind gaming is in play here…it would be great if Le Boss is just pulling Le Plonker of old red nose eh – shades of days gone by…*sigh*
Feisty Fukkin’ Fridee aye – RIGHT – WHO WANTS SOME???!!!??? …
drinks, that is. Sweet sherry to start with for me please barman – a small one if you have it – and whatever anybody else is drinking.
Psed got a tkt for this Sundee – but unusually it didn’t particularly put a spring in me step. Am hoping drinking in this bar pre-match might do that.
I Like TS’s tac-tic of fuk it let’s get stuk in anyway. Certainly can’t think of a better one with the squad we’re gonna have to pick from
UrEDS!
Wind, this is magnificent, and spoilt only by the news of Etta James’ demise. R.I.P. lovely lady with the soulful voice.
ABB: (sotto voce) shhh …not true about my condition. I am engaged in a highly tactical mind game with the venerable TABs. Must concentrate…over & out.
Holic @ 265: Really? Shame. I love her.. )0;
Chaps, can I respectfully ask that you don’t jump down my throat for saying this, but I would be totally satisfied with a 0-0 on Sunday.
Of course what I hope for is for Rooney to get three red cards and explode into a thousand pieces and us to win 10-0 but I just can’t see it happening.
Not dooming, just putting my most honest, realistic expectation out there.
Still…UTA and that!
Before my time ‘Holic π
Tee-shirts up for grabs tonight ‘holics. Come back when I am Puddled π
AL @ #264 – Hah! More f*ckin’ feist…er…. feist-tastic mate! π
GT @ #263 – Good but no sighing today please. A bare minimum of a two-fingered salute required! PS: I wouldn’t pull that old todger if it were on the end of a 10 foot barge-pole. Fack SAF and the Shrek he rode in on.
UTA! FFF!
Camberwell @ #268
No respect this evening please. Give us your opinion and tell us all to fack off if we don’t like it π
UTA! FFF!
Oh dear, I’m going to have trouble with you lot tonight, aren’t I ?
Forgot the winky, smiley thing. Bollocks to the lot of you π
And if we lose on Sunday….
FFF will not be replaced with MMM (Moaning Minnie Monday)
Good job there’s no days of the week starting with ‘C’
UTA!
‘Holic, you know where you can stick that T-Shirt mate! π
Get w*nkered. Enjoy. Tell us all to p*ss off when you’ve drunk your own bodyweight in Guinness.
FFF!
Be careful what you wish for. On pint four in 45 mIns. They are evaporating…
Hah! That’s the spirit! 4 pints in 45 mins? A true mathematical drinker π
FFF!
*wanders back in and finds upturned tables , spilt Beer ( most of it down Holic’s neck admittedly ) , a forlorn Baby Jesus doll sitting in a puddle , and most seriously a CMC that’s been wrenched from the wall *
What has been going on ‘ere then ? *said in best Dixon of Dock Green voice*
TS @247 – Hardinso Endit for all those Dirty Mancs ! πΏ
GoonerTerry @255 and @256 . – Of course I knew what you are thinking , but on account of your high blood pressure and heart condition , I don’t think it would be fair of me to reveal same . π
“Book of subtle insults ” Heh π
Enjoy ‘Holic !
RIP Etta James .
I shall be back . I must have a T-shirt ! I demand to have a T-shirt !
Heh! tabs π
Don’t attempt anything without the T-shirt.
Truthfully, I want one too but after my #276 I’ll be lucky not to cop one on the beak from the slightly sozzled Barman.
Roll-on Sunday. Real pints, real convo, real people, real football.
UTA!
FFF?
How’s this then?
When was the last time Arsenal lost 3 league games in a row?
So that’s gotta be one nil to The Arsenal come sunday then?
What do you mean! You don’t agree with me! Grrrrr π
GT @ 266 So relieved to hear that! As for you VS Tabs…kinda like Sidney Poitier and Sean Connery going at it. Will be very entertaining.
PS: I’m trying to think who I’m going to boo most loudly on Sunday when they touch the ball, such a choice…. Evra, Shrek, Berbatoss, Plug, Nani….. have no idea which of them is fit and/or likely to play.
I’m praying they play Agent De Gea. Have you noticed how you never see him and Almunia in the same room? He’s got to be worth a goal for us.
TS, just boo them all equally!
ABB @ 282: The trouble is that I like TABs too much to land a proper punch. Besides in a fist fight between Sidney & 007 my money would be on James Bond..
GT Sidney has impeccable manners and Sean is likely to be a little tired from all his “exertions”. At least a tie, I think.
Lars @ #284 & MtS @ #281
Both worthy of FFF! Cheers fellas now p*ss off and have a great evening π
PS Lars: Your world famous elephant’s ballbag wallet is now up on Twitter for the world to see, heh!
TS and Lars, We should boo Fergie as it seems he’s been saying nice things about us in the press. And we all know what that means…
Songs for FFF!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cec2HBgCkqk
Watcha Gonna Do About It (Small Faces)
I’m sure Steve T would appreciate that one.
abb, FFF could be Fack Fergie Friday
http://www.francefootball.fr/#!/news/2012/01/20/145028_bernes-paris-pourrait-faire-venir-nasri-ribery.html
Heh, I see that our friend BernΓ¨s is trying to make more money (can Nasri get an even bigger salary by playing for PSG? He’d certainly need protection from angry Marseillais).
Heehee,
We’ve got our ‘holic back, we’ve got our ‘holic back,
We’ve got our ‘holic back, we’ve got our ‘holic back. π
Is ‘holic quenching that diabolical thirst already?
Nearly hilarious opening minute for SablΓ© against PSG with a great chance.
Quenching Ollie? He did 4 pints in 45 minutes. You better pack your hollow legs on Sunday.
I’m with Lars @ 284 π
Wish I could be there booing with you lot.
I think ‘holic will shout extra abuse at Evra on my behalf.
Not that I won’t, but he’ll be better positioned.
Evra would get the most abuse from me as well, defines the word, ‘cunt’
Defence splitting pass into the box…
Heads it in.
Great assist, Wind. The diving header should look good on the photos.
Well in Ollie, haven’t seen a diving header that low since the WC 2010! Can anyone guess the aforementioned player…? π
@TABS:231
Great link.The wage structure is certainly an issue but with the upcoming departures and renegotiations it looks like it will be readjusted.
Lots of every interesting posts. Still to me it’s Steve T who got it right a couple of seasons ago. We’ve won nothing since we switched to 433 and I’m now fully convinced that 433 is the root of all evil at the club and the the Invincibles would have not won anything had they been playing 433. Pleasing on the eye on a good day but that’s about it.
1) Harder to recruit (which classy striker is going to come watch RvP from the bench?).
2) Worse results than 442 when the going gets tough. Team in our face on a bad day? 442 would get us a draw, 433 gets us a loss
3) Too much reliance on key positions. Bad day for the striker, the AM or the DM => draw or loss
4) Poor effectiveness of the wingers, too far for goals, too close for width
5) Too predictable and easy for opposition teams to get organized.
6) Limited rotation opportunities.
7) Many more injuries
8) Defense much more exposed.
9) Requires us to be at our best to win.
We’re going into the United games with a makeshift defense and key players missing. 442 could get us a draw, maybe a win if we’re lucky. With our 433 the best we can hope for is to avoid another thumping.
Because the run to the final is much shorter with cups, with some luck we can get something out of the FA Cup or the CL. But over 38 games, there’s absolutely no chance we’ll get near the top, however much we spend, as long as we persist with 433.
My 2 cents.
Great header Ollie.
Now go win yourself a teeshirt. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>