Podolski, A Massive Signing For The Gunners
Apr 30th, 2012 by 'holic
“It can happen soon, it can happen later, I don’t know.”
Arsene Wenger, smiling, 23/3/12.
That was Arsene’s response to being asked about a reported deal for Lukas Podolski over a month ago. Cologne faced important matches so the timing of any announcement would always be of their choosing. His current club face Bayern at home on Saturday in a vital final day match that could see them bow out of the top flight, or at best secure a play-off berth. It would appear they are offering the supporters a chance to say farewell to their idol before he moves to London.
I’m pretty sure I am not alone in being surprised that he is only 26, am I? I forgot just how young he was when we first caught glimpses of him as an 19 year old in the German national team after his native Poland had spurned the opportunity to select him. Having joined Cologne as a ten year old he made his first team debut eight years later, netting 10 times in 19 appearances in his first season. Two years later his 24 goals took Cologne into the Bundesliga, but when they went straight back down again the following summer Poldi moved on to Bayern for an eight-figure fee.
His three year spell in Munich were not his best at club level with only 15 Bayern goals to his credit, although he won a Bundesliga champions medal in 2008, and yet he continued to hit the mark regularly for the national team. His return to Cologne in 2009 was greeted with enthusiasm by the supporters who helped to fund the purchase by buying pixels in an image of the player on the club website.
With the news of his second departure breaking on his club’s website today, Arsene has been able to stop hiding behind that wry smile and talk about his new capture.
“We are happy to have made this signing early and we are looking forward to watching Lukas contribute at the European Championship over the summer, a level where he has already made 95 caps at the age of 26. That is a phenomenal record and just shows his quality as a player.β
Those who have been critical of us not moving early enough in the transfer market in the past will hopefully be cheered by this significant statement of intent. We need an additional goal threat in the squad, for certain, and we have bought ourselves a ready made scorer at the highest level as he reaches his peak years.
This one signing sends a signal to our rivals, and hopefully further astute moves are in the pipeline as a big summer approaches. For now though let’s just say a big welcome to Poldi, and get our minds back on those last two fixtures that could provide the perfect platform for his talents next season.
504 Responses to “Podolski, A Massive Signing For The Gunners”
Get in…….
So close to a hat-trick. So close
COYG CCMUED
Kolsch please. π
Good report. Agree with almost all of that. I think Podolski will prove a top signing for us.
It is great to see us move so early and I also agree that I hope this is one of several top class arrivals in the close season. It would appear that the club has learnt its lesson after the shambles of last year. All very positive for me.
Having had the privilege of seeing him play, I am rather excited by this signing.
Will now give me more incentive to cheer the Germans in the summer π
Poldi for me is a top top signing.
Zico – from the previous post.
I know about the success at Aberdeen, but weren’t they a big club then? Or at least not a small club, somewhere akin to today’s Lyon?
Arsene knew…
Got to be done, again!
Snir, no, not particularly.
Back on topic, who else we going to get?
Heh, that song has to be given an airing at the Tollington on Saturday, right tabs? 8)
By the way, I loved Lu Lu Lu Lucas Podolski when I heard it on YouTube. I still love it, but we are The Arsenal – can we make up our own song, please? There’s a Kenyan song called Tuli Tuli which could be changed to Poldi Poldi that might do rather nicely – I understand that the words translate as something like “La la la la” – but this isn’t a terribly serious suggestion.
Welcome, Lucas.
Would be a lot happier if I knew for sure he’d be playing alongside RVP next season …
Well I think we can rule out that Jokily is not Gervinho π
Podolski wide left, anybody?
Holic: Great find that video… Lu-lu-lu Lukas Podolsi. We have winner there!
@9 – do you believe me again after my crystal balls have faltered over the last couple of weeks ;)?
As for learning from the previous seasons, I’d be surprised if we didn’t try to sign a player or two for cut-throat prices at the last minute. Why pay for the full price when you can save a few millions…
I think Wenger signed Rosicky in similar circumstances before a major tournament, so it’s not unprecedented.
Oh, and sorry I linked to the English version of the Cologne website. I assumed everybody had read the German version by now…
pooodolski – he comes from Germany – he would have played at highbury – but then we moved just round the corner, to Ashburton Grove – it’s state of the art and that but now this song don’t scan no more – whooooaaaaaaaa!
I’ll be back!
Good try AL. 2/10
COYG CCMUED
Cheers Holic , thanks for the post . Good news indeed .
Quite happy to lead the singing Dr Z , Lu Lu Lu … π
Ze Germans are coming , and we all know what that means …
… Ze Arsenal are being overrun by Speedo men π
Not only does it not scan AL, he’s from Poland π
So now we have the Pole in the goal, and the Pole scoring goals.
There will be much Pole dancing at the Grove next season.
Oh yes π
OG that is seriously waaaay tooo kind – was wondering whether i ought to go with summat from the sound of music. 2 probs with that
1. It may have dodgy overtones.
2. I’ve never seen it.
But why let trifles (yes, them) stand in the way
That is by far the catchiest song in the PL.
So, to summarise:
Positive:
AFC sign new striker.
Alex’s head nearly explodes.
Negative:
Risk of chinless Premier League winner.
Alex’s head doesn’t explode.
Not a bad day all in all.
Nice post Holic.
Delighted with the Podolski deal. Reports in Germany suggest a weekly wage of circa 130k per week – which means welcome changes to the wage structure too.
Unfortunately, I watched the Manc Derby tonight. 95 mins – and not a shot on goal. What baffles me is how are Manu actually competing for the title with a bunch of pensioners in midfield? Then, hilariously, Mancini claimed in his post match interview that the advantage is still with Manu as they have “2 easy games” while Citeh have “2 hard ones”. This piffle, is what Sky are now referring to as, (wait for it), “mind games”. Almost as funny as the footage of ‘Arry leaning out the car window to tell the world that he does not “hold a grudge” against Woy getting the England job. Nice of him.
Mind games and Grudges while we sign top players….!
‘holic @ 23 then LeG Rash was worrying unnecessarily in the previous drinks when he wondered aloud that the German new-boy and the Polish keeper might clash due to differences of cultural nature – why that fellow talks endless cobblers – and looks only for the worst in everything and everyone – in short he’s a trouble maker (TM) IMHO!
He came to us when Bendy went,
Poldi, Poldi,
His goals for us are heaven sent,
Poldi, Poldi,
Some say he’s a German, some say he’s a Pole,
He’s more of a Gooner than Ashley Cole,
He’s Lukas Podolski,
Gooner through and through.
absolutely holic welcome poldi a great signing
AL,
Alice Clear.
Heh π
Podolski is a good player but do we really need him to partner/assist Van Persie upfront? He’s quick and like Robin, has a great, great left foot. Just hope we have a great player in Podolski for the seasons to come.
What about the midfield enforcer we’ve been missing sorely since Vieira leaves many moons ago? Diaby is a liability, Denilson is hopeless, and we’re supposed to be eyeing on M’Villa? He’s a bit overrated. For me, if given option to choose between M’Villa or Fellaini, I’ll choose Fellaini. Besides, we already have Arteta to persuade him to join us and he already have some Premiership experience.
Better try AL, 3/10
COYG CCMUED
How do you solve a problem like Podolski?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Podolski?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o’-the wisp! A clown!
Pole dancing and Sound of Music songs ?
#couldn’t be happier .
And i’m liking the idea of Pole dancing at The Tollie ‘h. But to paraphrase Dr. Zee from the last drinks “Does he (you know who i mean) really need anymore encouragement to jump up on tables and starting dancing etc” – it could get very, very messy, and somebody had better distract the the Zee Zee Top bouncer if it happens…
“He’s got leeeeegs, he knows how to use themmmmm, he’s got leeeeeegs etc” Hmmm – could work for the boy Poldi too – maybes?!? Not sure i can see a football crowd joining in en masse on that one though…
A change is in air at Arsenal. I hope it’s one of several, both Manchester club did not put the fear of god into me that we will never catch them.
π
Guys.
Its Lukas, not Lucas π
you get yer ‘ead down to do a post and there ‘e is…at it, on it and away!
Sorry, Wind
Wind @ 39 – it’s no longer guys – the slightly bonkas Brazilian changed all that
AL π
Oh gawd – all this talk about saturdee is getting me blood up already – and it’s still 4 more sleeps plus add-ons. To Bedfordshire and beyond…
Thanks all for the kind words yesterday – my efforts were a bit skinny compared to Dr Faustus and Joe though.
Tabs – Epic post yesterday – not a bad song above either π
‘Holic @23 –
yes, we have a Pole in the goal, and we’ll have a Pole scoring the goals. We just need a schemer now and we’ll have a Pole in the Hole.
I have to say I am genuinely worried about Jack’s career.
Ahem – As i shan’t be sleeping fridee night *think i might’ve gotten away with that one, just*
That youtube vid just proves we need to make ‘Lu Lu Lu, Lukas Podolski’ a proper chant in the stands next season. Epic.
Also, a very, very, very late message from me, ‘holic, to apologise for the fuck up that was the Tollie meet-up after Blackburn. I got in there (one of THE most crowded pubs I’ve ever been to) and suddenly realised I had no bloody clue who to look for.
Nevertheless, still had an awesome time out. Brilliant match to break my Arse cherry (ew), and I was even on the telly (first goal, close-up after Wenger reacts to RVP’s early opener. Arsenalist had it once upon a time!).
Tried my luck in getting to the Villa FA Cup game (3-2) but predictably it was sold out. Spent the second half in a Walthamstow pub next to THE biggest whinging ‘Arsenal season ticket holder’. Applauded Sagna ironically when he made his return from injury. ‘Yeah mate, welcome back. You’re still horseshit’. Ignored the three goals we scored in the second half but you can’t please everybody.
Despite that, I now want to move to London. Walthamstow perhaps. That is all.
Lukas Podolski = O, ok, kills a spud π
Walthamstow is the dogs, Jam… π
AL & Oxon, no problem gays π
The Bendtner Family (Arseblog News)
Niclas Bendtner
April 30, 2012 at 3:02 pm
Lukas who? Iβm the best striker in the world !
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Reply
Bendtner’s Mom
April 30, 2012 at 3:09 pm
Niclas⦠I told you to get off the computer and do your chores or no pizza for you!
Thumb up 31 Thumb down 0
Reply
Bendtner’s Dad
April 30, 2012 at 3:28 pm
And stay away from my car you little shit.
Thumb up 42 Thumb down 0
Cue the uncontrollable laughter π lol: π
Snir @ 46, y u worried about Jack’s career? π
Waiting for Godot.
Going to do the next six hours in the pit.
Laters…
wind – am happy to take that on the chin and wear it with pride!!!
Up The Arse!
Just a hunch Wind.
I’m not liking this injury and I have a horrible hunch that he’ll be the new Diaby.
I’d be buzzing about the signing if it wasn’t such a horrible secret for the last month. Regardless, it’s a great signing given his talent, and especially given his flexibility. No point signing a world class striker if he can’t get on the field with Robin in our current formation (OK, there is a point, but you get my drift). If we keep Walcott and he gets consistent, the speed and mobility of our front three will be fearsome, especially given that we’d have Ryo and Ox learning the trade as backup.
Love Lu Lu Lu Lukas by the way….
Podolski is a great pick up, would love to see another striker added to the squad as cover for the two world class ones we will now have. Hope we buy one very good midfielder as I fear Jack and Abu may not be regulars due to their body issues. Don’t forget we have The Coq and Ozzy coming up through the ranks that will mitigate having to get more than one quality midfielder.
Hope Joel Campbell can get a work permit as he looks classy and I have a soft spot for Costa Rican players. One defender and a quality backup Keeper and we should be on the verge of a very good season next year.
Go gunners
Brilliant!
By the way, prompted by young Trev, I complained to the Beeb about Lineker. Here’s their reply:
” Thank you for contacting us about the edition of βMatch of the Dayβ broadcast on Saturday 28 April.
Gary Lineker’s closing line was a light-hearted reference to shots of Stoke fans behind the dugouts imitating Arsene Wenger’s mannerisms. A clear differentiation was made between this and the booing of Aaron Ramsey which Gary Lineker and Alan Hansen strongly condemned.
In addition, Gary was not being xenophobic nor was he unfairly singling out a manager who has the admiration and respect of the whole βMatch of the Dayβ team and who has been the subject of praise on the show on many occasions.
Shots of football managers and their behaviour on the touchline have long been a source of good-natured humour across our output and elsewhere. However, we are sorry if we have inadvertently offended you.
Iβd like to assure you I’ve registered your complaint on our audience log. This is an internal report of audience feedback which we compile daily and is available for viewing by all our staff. This includes all programme makers and presenters, along with our senior management. It ensures that your points, along with all other comments we receive, are considered across the BBC.
Thanks again for taking the time to contact us”
So, of-course, I responded……….
My ITK friend, who to be very honest hasnt been all that reliable, tells we are in advanced talks for MVilla.
To be honest, unless Song goes to Juve (as some tabloids say) – I really dont see how MVilla fits in at Arsenal.
I rather go for some midfield creativity and also ensure, Theo and RvP sign on.
Podolski who?
Terrible signing, give us our money back π
Nitpicking but he looks totally 1 footed to me.
Btw, tabs, amazing drink in the last bar.
I agree with every word of it.
So Snir gets all the plaudits for calling the Podolski signing but I am certain that if one went through the drinks you will find it was I who first suggested that he would be an ideal signing for the mighty Arsenal…anyway as they say “a man is never honoured in his own bar”….(0;
Hehe, unlucky GT. To be fair, Miss Cleo did get a few things right in her days masquerading as a Jamaican psychic π
also got*
@15
The answer is no, based on your posts #46 and 54.
But anyway, who’s next?
AL @ 53, the sign of a man π
Snir @ 54, a hunch huh… π Well I hope for all our sakes that you’re wrong my friend. Fair enough he won’t be the same Jack that took on the B*rca midfield and held his own (some sources say he won :P) but I don’t think it will descend into Diaby levels, as long as he adds a cautious aspect to his game for the 1st half of the season or so, I can only hope to God π
NS Gooner @ 55, the Ox & Miyaichi as back up learning the trade? Almost makes me want to cream… an iced bun (^o^) lol π
Lots of rumours surrounding Jan Vertonghen at the moment, Dr.z.
But they’re only rumours.
Unless we can off-load a good half dozen of the obvious suspects (3-4 of which are forwards), I can’t see us signing more than one or two of the quality/reputation of Loopy Skull.
Would love to be wrong of course but we know the model that we operate.
Great signing! I love the way he just smashes ’em in rather than try to place them
Lu Lu Lu..Lukas Podolski!
Just came in my pants imagining the frontline options we have next year.
RVP, Lu Lu Lu Lukas Podolski, Theo, Gerv, Ox, Ryo, JC, Afobe fighting for 3 spots. Goddamn.
Lovely post again, goonerholic
The Bundesliga is probably the nearest to the pl in terms of pace, skill and physicality, and with Per to help him settle in, Goldi Poldi will be fine. (See, I’m calling him Goldi Poldi already.) It’s also pleasing that he is a fast and powerful player, great combination and a type of which we don’t have many representatives.
@ 19 And Lester
ha ha ha
@ 30 Andy Goram
very good!
***
Can we please not criticise the club for the timing of signings? It’s fair to criticise the choices, but we don’t control *when* someone signs for us. The signing happens when all the circumstances are right for the buying club, the selling club, and crucially the player. We started trying to sign Podolski over a year ago. We tried again in January, but the player didn’t want to abandon his club mid-season (and all credit to him for that, I say). For us to talk about the club moving early for once makes no sense if you remember that we very rarely know when the club started moves to sign any of the players we have, and that we have signed a lot of players early before now.
Anyway, that’s today’s bee in my bonnet! Back to the celebrations. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
Wind knows!?!
And SG – nos!
Rumours flying around about Arsenal opening talks with Ajax over Β£7 million Jan Vertonghen… Let me not get ahead of myself 8)
Slash @ #70
The Podolski signing is significant in nay way that you cae to look at it and it’s great news.
Afobe, JC and Ryo are future prospects with a lot of maturing to do. Ryo looks hottest given that he is now getting regular prem time at Notlob but the other two may not sparkle for several seasons.
We’re likley to try and off-load Park, Chamakh, Bendy & Vela in the summer. Maybe, just maybe, we’ll sign another front man or someone who can swap between a wide forward and a creative/attacking midfielder.
First job though must be to secure RVP and Theo for another season, no?
With apologies to the spelling and grammar police in my previous post.
…and of course, we need to secure RVP and Theo on long-term contracts. In my opinion, FACT!!!
http://www.cityam.com/sport/podolski-style-play-lured-me-arsenal
One very excited Churman.
Nice touch in that video where he doesn’t celebrate after scoring against Poland.
Do you forgive him, Arthur?
Must admit, I can’t remember being this excited about a new player for a long time.
Like a giddy schoolboy.
Goldi Poldi hallelujah,
And he plays for Arsenal
Welcome Lukas!
And I enjoyed seeing Funguscunt nearly explode yesterday.
‘Funguscunt’, heh! It really got to him didn’t it? Has he done a reverse Keegan???
Ladies (you know who you are) and gentlemen – first there was Lennon And McCartney – now there is Smallballs And Lester…
How do you solve a problem like Podolski?
How’d he catch that ball and bring it down?
How do you find the net like that Podolski?
A German/Pole in front of goal he wears the Arsenal crown!
*(Oi! knees up, knees up, don’t let the bees up, knees up mooothher browwwwwn!)
*Second stanza – strictly speaking NOT obligatory
right – orf to get on with the less serious side of life
@ TS: Agreed regarding JC and Afobe, they will most likely extend their loan spells. But three out of RVP , Poldi, Theo, Gerv with RYO and OX as impact subs is one of the most potent (atleast on paper) frontline in the last 5 years at The Arsenal.
Now to get RVP and Theo to sign along the dotted line and a creative mid.
SlaSh
It’s a good one on paper as you say and all subject to fitness, adapting to The Prem etc. But a new signing is almost always exciting and gives the whole club a big lift, esp. when it’s a ‘big name’.
I hope we can agree decent terms with both RVP and Theo this summer (and Song). Consistency in the squad can be as important as a few key signings.
You can sense the big lift it has already given to the gooners on various forums. Talking about a big lift, I am so ecstatic can’t get any work done at all.
http://www.football365.com/topical-top-10/7720335/F365-s-Top-Ten-Worst-Teams-To-Stay-Up
Love the picture of our old ‘friend’ in that article.
Where is he now? Still at Preston or did he get sacked there too?
I’ll be cheering for Germany in the Euros
@ 86
Especially when it comes to penalties π
GT – I’m pretty sure Zico and I were Poldi fanboys before you became a part of this bar π
It’s all Zico!:)
Anyway, I’ve been saying this for months now.
Poldi, JV, M’Vila, and Suarez/Giroud.
That’s why I’m certain we’ll challenge for the title next season.
@ #85
Currently operating a tanning salon somewhere in The North East?
Snir
Could JV fit into the Alex Song role as a holding player for the back four?
If we sign him as CB, we let Squilly and a.n.other go?
What about implications on home-grown rule?
‘Am relying on your expert search and media skills now…. π
The Pod needs a new nick name. Jan Vertonghen apparently on his way to Arsenal, rumours of M’vila all over the place. Wenger wants things done early, put his feet up and enjoy the Euros. Any new talent that will appear in the euros will have inflated prices. Good move from Arsene this time.it also shows Wenger is going back to the good old days of buying establsihed, physically srong players, I think “the diminutive skillful kids project” was over once Fabregas and Nasri left. the plan was to have a group of young players growing together and form an amazing team but the reality is kids project is vulnerable to inexperience , inpatience and to the agents’s greed.
You know it’s official when it’s on Goonerholic. π The other good news is that each and every passing day brings us closer to the CUNTDOTHFC. For the uninitiated, see previous drinks.
Re: AL @81. I’ll bring my parasol for the singalong. π
Welcome home Pod!!!!
TS – I’ll get back to you on that later…
Going to school now, and won’t have any time to check any of that.
Re: Wolfie @35. No wonder why AL was giving you credit for that song. π
Re: Oxon @11: If the Arsenal supporters can learn the harmonies and body movements of the Kenyan boys choir and perform them at matches, we will be downright unstoppable. The lyrics as they stand may be a bit complicated, but Poldi Poldi should be a bit easier to remember. π
Punts the ball upfield………
CoR, The good news is you are in first place in the HT league. The bad news is Snir and Tabs are moving up like steaming locomotives in 3rd and 4th place. A good deal of guile could be required in these last two weeks because the last thing you want is to be passed at the last minute like old red nose. π
Booya!
You can’t give this guy space, he’ll punish you, he punishes everyone!!!
Incisive finish CG ….. let’s hope Poldi is as deadly..
@91: WC, a new nickname for Poldi? How about Lukas Po-troll-ski? π
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150762683854192&set=o.123701174368610&type=1&theater
@99: 8ball,The path of the righteous is beset on all sides by the tyranny of evil men but THOU SHALT NOT PASS! (At least not with those kick-and-rush players in your team!)
Didn’t anyone get the Pro Evo commentary reference?
That little gem from John Champion is up there with such classics as:
“Tell yer what John, call himself a keeper? He couldn’t keep bees!” (Lawro)
Re: CoR. Personally, I have given up all hope of winning the Championship. Kind of like Mancini. π
Haha! Is that what passes for mindgames in the HT carriage now 8ball? Don’t make me berate the 4th official π
Guten Tag ‘holics,
Gut post, yet again, ‘holic and willkommen Lukas! Finally, we have our new iPod and it’s a top of the range one with loads of jiggy bytes! “Lu lu lu Lukas Podolski!!! π Regarding this, i’m not sure where Stato-Snir and Dr Z get the audacity to take early credit for ze German’s rumoured acquisition over the last months?! It’s been written on a piece of paper inside the left breast-pocket of my Tweed jacket for over a year now with Vertoghen, M’Villa, Hazard and RVP, TR7, and Theo to resign on a piece of paper in the other! Tidy up our transfer business before the Euros, then sit bacannoy hope for no injuries before pre-season! π
Good drinks at the previous bar and always welcome to see a Potter, Isoza, trying to defend his Rugby side! Couldn’t disagree more with his views wrt the shameful treatment of young Aaron and the “hilarious impersonation” of Arsene that left the jug-eared-cunt off MOTD pissing himself! Nice complaints lodged regarding that by the way Stato Snir & BtM! Great to see that the licence fee’s not being wasted and the Beeb’s saving on the need for bespoke responses to complaints!
Pulis is a massive balding cunt that resembles a shaved scrotal sac!
Not unhappy about a point at Stoke but a good win in our final home game against the budgerigars should ease the pressure fully. Especially as West Brom have secured mid-table mediocrity and their manager’s feckin’ off to take up his rightful role as English Football’s Premier English manager who’s not a complete cunt! You no what I mean ‘arry! π
As opposed to others I’ve read, there is no way I can accept the Oily Mercs winning the title with that chinless, lesbian cunt; nor can I accept that cunTerry and his collection of amoral cunts winning anything this season! As Tabs has mentioned, SAF got his Manc-USA tactics completely wrong! A poor game of football devoid of real quality! “The biggest game in premier league history!” My arse!!! No shots on target, no flying Valencia on the wing, and trying to keep the ball with two geriatrics in midfield and a bench-warmer that hasn’t played for most of the season?! Looked like Oxon’s dementia’s finally hit old-red-nose! Nevertheless, hope the Barcodes can at very least do the necessary next weekend, and against the Bus Stop midweek! COYBG!
And for one time in my life only:
Come on the Barcodes! Come on Manc USA!
Come on the Red-Scouse cunts!
Kommen auf Bayern MΓΌnchen!
Well in Camberwell for the century π Maybe there’s hope for you yet… π
And I’m sorry to inform you mate, but Pro Evo has been shit since Pro Evo 2006 was conceived. Pro Evo 5 = the last bastion for the series & the last good game I’m afraid.
Well in, CG.
Am wondering if Gervinho will now share right wing duties with Theo.
TS@90: Almunia, Arshavin, Chamakh, Fabianski, Park, Squallici and Vela are non-homegrown players In the Premiership squad that could be moved on to make space for newcomers. Bendtner and Mannone count as home grown. Benayoun is also non-home grown, if he decides to leave to seek regular football.
– Squallici
+ Squillaci
Schadenfreude is a dish best served effing cold innit…
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/4289403/HARRY-REDKNAPP-could-be-left-in-contract-limbo-by-Spurs.html
How do you solve a problem like Podolski,
How’d you make a German win the game,
How do do you mark a man like that Podolski ,
His Speedoes worn his mullet shorn, A Dame .
Smallballs and Lester .
These would be the 10-12 keepers for next season among our non-homegrown players. We are allowed 17 in the premiership squad. So the club has to sell at least one of those listed @110 or leave them out of the squad as AA and Vela will presumably be anyway. Also Woj, I think, will no longer count as an under-21 next season so a slot in the league squad will have to be found for him, though he counts as home-grown.
Abu Diaby
Sagna
Mertesacker
Vermaelen
Koscielny
Rosicky
Arteta
Van Persie
Santos
Gervinho
Chamakh,
Benayoun
Keepers Ned ? Not sure I fancy any of them in goal frankly .
‘Hallo’ Holic and holics ! Kinda have a hunch we will all be fluent in German by end of next season. You know, haven’t seen you guys this euphoric, since, well, gosh who knows. Lukas does have some very impressive stats, especially, my favorite. He loves to take ‘long distance shots’. Plus his ‘failure’at his former club surely taught him some valuable lessons. So Lukas, we happily welome you into the Arsenal family, son and best of luck to you in your new home.
Great link Canons .
“Being a manager in the Premier League is fantastic. Going to Old Trafford, going to Anfield is great, I love it.
βManaging England must be fantastic as well with all those top players and the top tournaments.
βBut I would enjoy being manager of somewhere like Poole Town in a few yearsβ time, going back to Bournemouth or wherever, I would still be enjoying it.”
‘Arry Redknapp .
Careful what you wish for ‘Arry innit π
TaBS
As a Bournemouth lad, I’m pleading with you – don’t go giving him any ideas!!
Talking of keepers, we will need one of those too.
We have to find a decent backup to Szczezzer – I watched Fabianski drop a high punt from Woj through his arms, then through his legs, and then trip himself up while turning round to pick it up. And that was in the warm-up against Man City !!!
At which point this religionless person prayed to every God in the universe that we never see him in competitive action for us again. Ever.
Sorry, but can’t help how you feel.
Massive signing indeed! What a footballer!
“Lu – Lu – Lu – Lukas Podolski, Robin Van Persie and Mikel Arteta!!!”
good report man!
Though all my attention today is to this video with Frimpong rapping with Check out our boy Frimpong rapping with Lethal Bizzle!!!
And he puts the boot in on Spurs!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dxDpSMZU3Sc
RAD!!
Leave it Yeah!
Apologies Dr C . ‘Arry’s words not mine though π
Trev , cheers for the kind words earlier . As regards Fabianski , I think he’ll make a good keeper somewhere (he had an excellent run last season before he got injured) , but I agree that it won’t be at Arsenal .
He needs to play . Personally I really think he’ll make it if he gets the right Club,somewhere less high profile than Arsenal .
Unlike Almunia . Devoid of ambition (relatively) and permanently wearing the look of a man who is being stalked by Mossad agents , I would be surprised if he now got a game for the Haunted and Harried Celebrity XI .
As a replacement , what about Jussi JÀÀskelÀinen ?
Being a reserve at Arsenal must be a better option than being a reserve at Bolton . Bolton owe us a favour . Wenger likes him, having been rebuffed once before when he was at his peak . Experienced but not too ancient , big and commanding , I reckon he fits the bill .
tabs, or maybe Schwarzer.
Maybe Lars , but Schwarzer is still first choice at Fulham , isn’t he ?
I think he must also be very close to the big 40 , if he’s not there already , whereas Jaaskelainen is only 36/37 .
Steve @ 121, heh, the boy done good π
tabs, I think he is past 40. And I am not sure JÀÀskelÀinen is still good enough to even be second choice. He looks to be a bit too past it to me.
Tabs and Lars
I like your thinking, guys.
A pint of black stuff for the both of you. We need to reignite the tradition of getting the drinks in, surely?
I’m just finishing off a rather nice glass of chilled Rueda. Kids are next door, Cornish pasties made by own fair hand browning in the oven.
Girls in bikinis in garden.
Sweet….
Girls?
Bikinis?
Cheers for the drink Mr C . You paint the very picture of idyll . Presumably you are clad in Speedoes ?
Lars , I’ll take your word for it on JJ , given that I haven’t watched Bolton Reserves much this season . π
That said , you may well be right , if he’s being kept out of the Bolton side by the young Ginge (whose name escapes me) , and who has never really impressed . It’s just i don’t remember Jussi doing that much wrong to get dropped in the first place , but that might just be the result of my ever failing memory .
As regards Schwarzer I just don’t see us attracting anyone who is capable of holding down a first team place elsewhere in The Premiership , to come and sit on our bench .
Heh, I haven’t watched their reserves either but the few games he played for them last season weren’t particularly good and I don’t think he’s played at all this season.
Idle girls?
The night is young…., 8)
Another option though I hate to mention their name is whoever is out of favour at Stoke Cunty.
Sorensen or Begovic . Surely anyone would welcome a free pass out of that madhouse ?
Mind you , loads of gossip about that Birmingham kid Jack Butland , so Arsene might go in an entirely different direction and buy a youngster !
The only thing we should ever take from Stoke is the quickest way out of the place.
Good point Dr Z .
Budgie smugglers securely in place, Tabs
I would be wearing hats and gloves on anorak if I were in a garden around here at the moment.
Excellent news Mr C .
Another convert to the Speedo cause π
Talking of Speedoes , I see The Speedo Massive have muscled Snir’s very impure AFCMTA out of third place , and sit just 4 points behind 8Ball’s collection of c*nts and 14 points behind Canons’ even bigger collection of cunts .
A nice little Jelavic hat trick and an Everton clean sheet tonight , and I shall begin to dream π
tabs, I think my HT League team deserves a reward for most unselfish team. I mean, for more or less the whole season it has been sitting there at rock bottom which means that the rest of you have not had to see your teams in that position…
Tabs@132: there are a number of young keepers coming up through the club. Martinez and Charles-Cook are particularly both highly thought of. With Woj looking ensconced as No 1, it is surely unlikely that AW will buy more youth as a back-up.
CG: Rueda, girls in bikinis, Speedoes and Cornish pasties, you say. What could possibly go wrong?
Thanks NBN @ #s 110 & 114. Interesting that you see Chamakh as a ‘keeper’. I’d love to see him regain the form of the first half of last season but was figuring that he’s be on his way back to Southern France in the summer. We’ll all find out soon enough…
Trev @ #119 – I think Fabianski might push his way out of the door wanting full time football. Vorm at Swansea looks a bit special but there’s no way he’ll leave to be a #2.
CoR @ #112. Nothing like a bit of cold shadenfreude directed towards the LWCs. Would PMSL if ‘Awwy lost his job in the summer although I think his true Gooner heart has helped them to collapse since we smashed them at The HoF.
Lars – Your fantasy team has been a wholly selfless exercise in giving to others . You have my vote π
Ned – Yep fair enough . I was being lazy and just repeating gossip , which may of course be bollocks .
TS: it’s not over yet, though, in terms of finishing above Looting Town. I think they will win tomorrow (on account of Bolton just not being very good at all) and then all of a sudden it’s two straight wins for them and their confidence will get a significant boost. I am starting to think that we will have to win both of our remaining games if we want to finish third, so there is no room at all for complacency now.
tabs, thank you very much π
Lars – Schwarzer is first choice tonight and currently playing in goal vs The ‘Smashers.
‘Smashers have done well so far and have scored an opening goal at home! What?…Oh… π
Lars, our posts crossed.
Agree, we have to beat Naarwich and WBA.
If LWCs lose a game then all the better but we have to keep it in our hands.
TS: I have to admit that while I am normally calmness personified and would never do things like get nervous, shout at the tv or walk around the room because I can’t sit still when footie games are on I will probably be a bit on edge by tomorrow night…
West country cider please barman, and an outside table with parasol in case I get the urge to start dancing with it. π
Tabs –
you took the words – and the Scandinavian umlouts – right out of my mouth.
Jussi Jaaskelainen would fit the bill very nicely.
International experience and loads of Premier League experience if needed. That of course could all be passed on to Sczcesny who, at his age, will need more than up and coming reserves and youths to turn to at some stage of his career.
Jussi has been displaced at Bolton by Bogdan and, as you say, if he is destined to be a number two (ooh, matron) where better than The Arsenal, where the possibility of a title challenge and Champions League football would be a tasty looking carrot indeed.
Anything with an umbrella in it for bt8bbgfg please barman.
What’s he doing in here at this time, anyway ?
Doesn’t he know they are hours and hours behind us over there ?
What am I doing in here at this time, come to that ? π
Makes sense to me Trev , all on the proviso that his decline is not as severe as Lars believes it might be .
By the way, if I do go dancing with a parasol I will be aspiring to look a little bit like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBUfiUThFZ4
Those were two clips from the New Orleans Jazz Fest in 2004 and 2005 and I can give you very good odds that I was present and accounted for, if only by large amounts of inebriating drink. π
It is at least 6 years in a row now that I have missed the Jazz Fest after 12 straight years of being present and accounted for in the already stated manner.
May 1 is Jazz Fest season and I can feel it in the air if I am more than 1000 miles away at the wrong end of the mighty Mississippi. Riverboat please, barman!
Trev and Tabs, I have a feeling you would both be strong candidates to do well in the parasol dancing academy, but especially Tabs or his alter ego. π
Excuse me for all the extracurricular distractions. It has been quite and month here dog-wise and the parasol dancing must be my way of letting off steam. In four weeks it’s been dog dying, new dog searched for, identified and brought home, then new dog lost and one day later the new dog is found again. I hate to think what could be next but for now I am planning to teach the new dog parasol dancing.
Still looking for a name for the new dog. Could Jussi Jaaskelainen be the ticket?
Time to drive 7 year old to choir practice. If only their music lent itself to parasol dancing these practices would be less tedious …
Ta Ta!!
I am a parasol dancer extroadinaire 8Ball .
I believe the talent is in how long you can keep it up .
WHAT ?!? We’re being infiltrated by the Germans ?
When did this happen ?
I knew it ! Kroenke ? That sounds about as English as Wiener Schnitzels !
Wenger ? Never struck me as a French name ?!
Well they won’t catch me . . . . Come alomg Wilson . . . Don’t tell him Pike !
Fuckin’ bastard Stoke score and cost the Speedo Massive crucial points . Cunts . π
Hey, hey 8ball @ 93 i look forward to it…
On the goal-keeping front – keep things German i say – bring bak jens again…nope!?! Nothing useful to add then
Does yours have an auto-collapse button for emergencies Tabs π
PHW heh π They don’t like it up ’em Sir π
No Trev . I believe in the loud and proud approach .
I like to keep mine up in all situations . One never knows when it might come in handy .
You ?
Evening AL , got the next verse ? π
Blimey – while in the midst of back-drinking i see 8balls commitment to the whole parasol lark has hardened…you go, err – dude!
I have now – speedoes and a mullett…de rigout home and away from now on – no!?!
Some of them do, takeabowson, some of them do.
Now, I have dangerous work to do. Has anybody seen my helmet ?
Yes Tabs, I didn’t realise it was a feature but mine auto-collapses at the most inopportune moments. π
Speedoes and a mullett AL – sounds a bit fishy . . . . .
don’t start that again π
PHW and Trev π
AL , I was rather hoping you might have verse 3 in the locker . If we’re gonna start comparing ourselves to those crazy scouse mop tops , speed is of the essence π
Treeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvvv – i ended up on the naughty step for lines like that last time…and i NEVER want to go stickleback there again – for reel!
tabs – if you can let me have some i’ll get to work right away!
Quick hey all. Al @ 161. Yes, bring him back , please! Over the hill at forty, no way! Now you all know keepers are a different breed…they really do get better with time. Lars@ 146, Multiple chuckles, lad. The rest of you don’t need any pats on the back from me (but how you guys make me smile). Till tomorrow.
Ok AL need the last line …
How do you solve a problem like Podolski ?,
How do you train a man who likes Cologne ?,
How do you track a man like that Podolski?,
Podolski Provokes Piscine Puns
Shock! Horror!
Aah right – i was actually referring to speed not ahem lines…however Wolfgang never let it be said that i don’t (another ahem) rise to a challenge…felt we’d more or less nailed “problem” and went off to make a start on the tricky second single – do please see below – cologne – Co-looo-nah – i’ll get back to you psed does the rhyme have to make scents (Boom! Boom!)
Yesterday, being at The Arse seemed so far away,
Now your here on an undisclosed fee,
Oh we believe in Pod-ol-ski
Suddenly, we got a partner for RVP,
A goal-scorer with ability
Oh Pod-ol-ski scores suddenly
What’s your favourite role,
Middle, left or given a free
Right now you can do no wrong
How we long for Pod-ol-ski-ee-ee-ee-eeeeee
AL – Fuckin’ Ace π π
Heh @ #159 π
too kind tabs, too kind, ta – i’d also like to thank errr John and Macca, Wolfgang Smallballs, Lukas of course, WB Yeats, Stanley Unwin and a couple of glasses of this and that…
What the fuck is going on? What are Auntie playing at now.
I’m sat here watching a Newsnight item about Woy. They’ve done a (very) vaguely amusing report with a voiceover saying things like “FA 1, Pundits 0”.
Then they had Stuart Hall spouting bollocks. OK, fair enough, it’s what he does.
Then they have Joey Barton…
Fuck this, TV off, I’m going to bed.
Night all.
@ 175 – Double-up ‘cos you won’t do it alone
dats all i got tabs
Tabs – me? Impure??
You have Kompany and Aguero!!!
How dare you?!?
I wind mind signing one of Begovic, Sorensen, and Gordon.
It’s been a good day for Uncle Woy hasn’t it?
He’s been confirmed as the new England Manager.
His previous club (where he was much maligned) got beaten at ‘Fortress Anfield’ by his previous previous club (where he was lauded).
His performance at Liverpool is now superior to that of the bacon faced k*nt.
Congrats Woy. If anyone can turn the average team that is England awound, it’s you. Best of British to you.
Heh AL , I was looking for something scent based π
“He wears a scent , but he’s not bent , so please don’t call him Joan”
is all I’ve got π
Best give it up . The good news , though , is that our next hit with an entirely different tune is on its way . π
TS – what do you mean his performance at Liverpool superior to Kenny?
All I know is that Woy was fired after 21 games with 33 points… Dalglish had a bit more this season after 21 games (don’t really remember how many right now).
When I find myself in times of trouble, Lu Podolski comes to me
Scoring goals of beauty, Po-dol-ski
And in my hour of darkness he is standing right in front of me
Scoring goals of beauty, Po-dol-ski
Pod-ol-ski Pod-ol-ski Pod-ol-ski Pod-ol-ski
Scoring goals for Arsenal Po-dol-ski .
And when the drunken singing Gooners living in the world agree
There will be a German, Po-dol-ski
For though he isn’t German, there is still a chance that they will see
There will be a German, Po-dol-ski
Po-dol-ski Po-dol-ski Po-dol-ski Po-dol-ski
There will be an answer, Po-dol-ski .
Snir , it was agreed at start of season Man City would not be designated impure . π
Yeah, that’s why I had them, but then Ollie decreed they are, and you have to listen to Ollie, don’t ya?! π
Hmmm π
Fine work indeedy – fella!!! Why tabs we don’t just got an album on our hands here – we’ve an entire genre (pronounced in that terribly pretentious more or less one syllable stylee – o’ course) i tells yer…
The Lukas Podolski Song Books –
Vol. 1 Sees Lukas Set To The Sound Of Music
Vol. 2 Roll-Over Beethoven – It’s This Germans Turn To Join In With The Fab Four
Vol. 3 Errr, To Be Discussed
Its got “winner” written all over it AL π π
Good night Tabs.
Good to see your usual witty and acerbic self..!
May I ask – do you think we’re going to close out third with two wins?
Hello Joe , six million dollar question there .
Not entirely confident no . We miss Arteta badly .
Best guess is that I think we’ll beat Norwich and draw at W Brom .
Really hoping The LWC’s et al drop points to alleviate the pressure .
And you ?
Clever stuff @186 π
Much the same.
I find it really frustrating that we find ourselves in this position considering that we managed to do so well to come back from where we were. I really feel we’re playing with fire and we’ve hardly had the best track record in closing things out over the past years have we?
Im very concerned – and y’know, I think I’d feel the same way irrespective of who were playing because we’ve been so inconsistent…….but luckily, so far at least, we’ve been less inconsistent than others if you know where I’m coming from?
Yep know where you’re coming from .
I’m hanging on grimly to the thought that
a)Bayern should beat Chelsea
b) Spurs are even more unpredictable than we are
c) Chelsea’s luck must run out at some time .
d)Newcastle aren’t good enough and Pardew in the Champs League would send the Universe spinning out of kilter .
All far from certain though . A great deal of nail-biting to be done yet I reckon .
Cheers Trev π
Lurkers , show yourselves !
186
‘kin genius
Thank you Sir and nice century π
And the powerful striker beats the offside trap and finishes with aplomb!
Nice double century ‘holic! π
And on that note with some interesting back reading amidst work, I raise a glass of malt scotch to your health lads! Cheers ‘holics!
Never missed a sitter in my prime. Nice to know I’ve still got it π
π
Just wondering, Does this Podolski come with batteries included? Whenever my daughter asks for one of these action toys the tough part seems to come when assembly is required and batteries must be bought before the darn thing starts working as advertised. I know, nobody wants to hear the tough questions at this stage but …
Re: Snir @189. Now I’m getting confused. Did Ollie decree that Man City players are pure or impure? A little late in the season to get bogged down in such details, I must say. Although it wouldn’t be a “detail” if it turned out that the league champion happened to have a Man United player in their team most of the season now, I’m sure we would have a near acclamation on that score?
Should’ve put a π at the end of that last one I think. π
@177 & 186: AL and tabs, great stuff! I’ll get working on my chant in a minute.
By the way, to all challengers of my HT throne, I must warn you, the ensuing battles will not be for the light of heart. I will slay my challengers and drink blood from the chalice of their skulls and then line up to buy my new replica shirt.
Anyone in speedoes may be spared provided they can dance a jig or ride a unicycle blindfolded…
8ball – Ollie decreed them impure.
6 teams are disallowed – Spurs, Stoke, Chavs, Man U, Liverpool, and City.
Not sure about that Snir, when we started didn’t Holic say that rule was for the other league he was taking part in? Also, nobody ever said City was off-limits.
You guys don’t respect Ollie as much, do you ?!?!
Anything he says is objective truth!
He’s not the grammar kind for nothing! π
Here we go!
My name is Lukas,
I passed through the Arsenal doors,
I will score just for you,
And I smell like Christian Dior,
If you hear German late at night,
Some kind of cheer, some kind of fight
Just don’t ask Per what it was
Just don’t ask Per what it was
Just don’t ask Per what it was
I think it’s ’cause I’m Poldi,
I try not to talk too loud.
Maybe it’s because I’m classy,
I try not to act too proud.
Iβll always dart in from the flank
And when I do Iβll always bank
You wonβt be lacking for a goal
You wonβt be lacking for a goal
You wonβt be lacking for a goal
And of course Podolski don’t work out the BBB’s are going to need their own song so I offer this little Beatles tune:
Lukas was a Pole who thought he was a German, but he was another man / Lukas left his home in Koln, West Germany for some Hi-bur-ry grass / Get back, Get back, Get back to where you once belong…Get back Lucas!
* IF he doesn’t work out…
GT @213, You devil you. π At this rate you’ll have a job working for the BBB in no time. π
Re: Snir @211. If Ollie were the grammar king he would have corrected your “grammar kind” by now. Grammar kings can correct grammar even in their sleep.
I love grammar.
But only if she wears lingerie.
This is just in case we change our formation in the summer ;D
Picture yourself on a goat in the forest,
With red-currant trees and pearly-white skies,
Gazidis calls you, you answer quite slowly,
A man with the beadiest eyes
Cellophane flowers of scarlet and white
Towering over your head
Look for the man with the goals in his eyes
And heβs gone
Lukas at the top of the diamond
Lukas at the top of the diamond
Lukas at the top of the diamond, aaaah
Can anybody explain what’s up with this week’s schedule? Arsenal playing the only league game on Saturday?
Maybe it’s because of the FA Cup final 8ball, think it’s this weekend…
Aha, you must be on the money, CoR. Chelsea v. Liverpool in the FA Cup final. The entertainment will be in counting how many more Chelsea players get injured and suspended, that is if they survive tomorrow against Newcastle. Newcastle due a rebound after that horror show against Wigan. Come on the football while it lasts.
Heh Shaft @ 218
Exemplary
π
Heh, great lyrics everybody π
Snir, didn’t Ollie say that for him City was considered impure but the general concensus was that they were (with the exception of the chinless one?) not? That’s how I remember it anyway.
CoR/8ball: yes, the final is on Saturday at 5.15 UK time (or was it 5.30?). That is also why Liverpool played a significantly weakened team last night and Chelsea will probably rest a couple of players as well tonight v Newcastle.
Great songs although Shaft just edges it for me.
Lukas at the top of the diamond. Pure quality.
“Lukas at the top of the diamond”…top o’ the shop stuff Shaft
Plus you’ve the ‘tache too – front cover of Vol. 2 “Roll Over Beethoven” the Podolski/Beatles song book awaits…
Tabs, AL, CoR, GT; you’ve all outdone yourselves there. Superb work.
TABS – if your offering is not sung on the terraces on Saturday I’ll, well, I’ll be mildly surprised and raise an eyebrow.
8ball
Any dog names yet? Maybe “Tollie” so that you can feel closer to the socialising?
Multiple hehs π
I was in the running for HT league crown(well, top 4 actually) until I stopped changing my team regularly. All I can say is the current top four have been impure at one stage of this season or another π
The GT Rollers seem to have somewhat improved of late, happy in our mid table security.
Looking down on the likes of Dr F, Lars and Ollie, whilst yearning to be as good as Camberwell!!
Come on Bolton and a draw between Chelski/Newcastle tonight!
Thanks for your kind appreciation holics!
Let’s hope we can get the Emirates to ring out these numbers next season π
As for FA cup final, it’s hard to decide which team I want to do worse. Actually, no it’s not. Any team with T*rry in it deserves to lose…
Anyone want to join me in a strong coffee?
… With a dash of something extra, please!
I think I want Chelski to win the FA Cup (because Liverpool winning two trophies in one season despite being utter crap is just taking the piss) and then of course for Bayern to stuff them.
Barca papers strongly linking Drogba with Farca.
RVP, Bale, Torres and Juan Martinez all mentioned too.
Keep going with the Drogba one, boys, and leave us alone.
Here’s some whiskey for the coffee Catalan.
Get the spirits up and down ya!
Charlie, Liverpool winning two trophies while playing crap would be great if it means King Kenny stays there next season I reckon π
I hope Chelsea win sweet FA. Let the scousers delude themselves with the two trophies (although Fa cup is a pretty big scalp) and their misplaces sense of trust in KKK.
I cant bear those blue cunts lifting any trophy.
Come on Miyachi, rip spuds a new one today.
misplaced*
Morning All,
Firstly, In light of this morning’s ‘headlines’ in that bastion of journalism integrity known as The Stun, I’d like to apologise to any who are offended by my post @ #184. I do wish Roy Hodgson the very best of luck in turning England into a team that I might actually want to cheer and follow again.
Snir @ #187. You’re right but maybe not in terms of points per game in charge? Anyway, my real point was that he achieved pretty much the same as Kenny in terms of PL performance as KKofK without the same level of support or resources i.e. the aggressive, bacon-faced pensioner would also be under tremendous pressure were it not for goodwill and domestic cup performance.
Lars @ #223. Yes we all agreed early-on that a Vulagarian in your team was OK (Na$ri aside). I doubt that level of leniency would be applied for next season based on what’s happened in this. Maybe we’ll start next season feeling well disposed towards having Red Mancs in your team? *suppresses sick in mouth*
CoR – Heh! @ #218
Charlie @ #231 – WIll be rooting for Bolton with Ryo tonight. Looks like a helluva big ask but you never know. They’re fighting for their prem lives.
Right, off to view the train-wreck that is Storey’s Strollers for the first time in ages. Relegation beckons π
Come on Ryo. do your bit.
I’ve been listening, reading about Roy Hodgson. The gutter press did not get their darling Rednapp and turned on Roy in a petulant manner it is just vicious. They dug deep in his life they found nothing in his closet to write about they decided to pick on his speech inpedement. It is really sad and I feel sorry for ROy he is a real gentelman, this is a guy when he get upset on the touchline he rubbs his face rather than have a good at the ref.
Well said Wenger’s coat.
Storey’s Strollers have been freshened-up somewhat. More or less in-tact in terms of integrity with a few minor discressions (ahem). Too little, too late however. We’ll be back season after next π
Morning Pop Pickers ,
Some fine efforts overnight on the Poldi does the Beatles theme . A tip of the hat to Canons , Shaft and GT . This could run and run . So many songs , so little time …
Mr C @227 , I live in hope . It has been a source of deep personal trauma this season , that “Liar Liar” has not been taken up by the masses . I cannot afford another failure . I am one bad song away from being drummed out of The Tollie Choir and sent home in disgrace .
I am considering posting the words to my loyal (but tiny) band of followers on Twatter , in the hope that everybody is word perfect for Saturday , but I am cognizant of the fact that this course of action has an inherent risk of “follower desertion” in such numbers that I might thereafter find myself talking to myself alone (though having viewed Twatter for a couple of weeks , this appears to be the norm π )
Come on Bolton !!!!!
Shaft @218 – great stuff.
Catalan –
cheers for the local press update. I have to say that I am, in the words of Arsene, ‘very calm’ about the RvP situation. I think he wants to stay, the signs are that the club is making the right moves at the right times, and I think he will stay.
Has Tabs posted anything yet today ?
Lu Lu Lu Lucas Podolski!!!
Snir – do you happen to know if we will also sign Vertoghen and M’villa, as we do need those two minimum to compete in all 4 next season, as we are short??
Poldi sings The Beatles, contd –
When I get older losing my hair
Many years from now,
I will still be playing in the Reds front line,
Smashing goals in, oh how sublime.
Some with left foot
Some with the right
Headers too galore,
Teams will still fear me
Will you still cheer me
When I’m Sixty-Four !
TS @ #239 – apparently the Spuds haven’t won at the Reebok in the league before, and haven’t won an away game in 2012, so fingers crossed they can keep that up for at least one more game.
Found something quite funny on de youtubessss, thought you gooners might appreciate it π
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=602iLWNMw4k&feature=g-u-u
Charlie, thanks! Made my day. For some strange reason I was thinking that this was a home game for the LWCs. Away at The Reebok is certainly an opportunity for them to drop more points at a tricky place to visit…. we should know π
Bolton might just squeak a draw but I’m not expecting it.
A Podolski song I heard earlier this week but with no reference to The Beatles or the creativity of others above:
(To the tune of the Vierra song – ‘Volare’)
Podolski, whoa-oh
Podolski, whoa-oh
He comes from Ger-many
He scores with Van-Persie
Podolski, whoa-oh
Has there ever been a player whose name lends himself to so many tunes?? π
Excellent work Trev π
Good link Canons .
And another one for the pot π
Hey Lu, you’re a Gunner
Take a great side and make it better
Remember to let us into your heart
Then you can start to make us better
Hey Lu, don’t be afraid
Hug Van Persie and kiss Arteta
The minute you let us under your skin
Then you begin to make us better
And anytime you’re at the Lane , hey Lu, refrain
Don’t worry about that hostile climate
For well you know that it’s a Bale who plays to fail
By making his world a bit more primate
Na na na, na na, na na na na
Hey Lu, don’t let us down
You have found us, now score for Wenger
Remember to let us into your heart
Then you can start to make us better
So see the net and put it in, hey Lu , begin
You’re waiting for someone to perform with
And don’t you know that it’s just you? Hey Lu, you’ll do
The movement you need is in the midfield
Na na na, na na, na na na na, yeah
Hey Lu of Arsenal
Take a great side and make it better
Remember to let us under your skin
Then you begin to make us better
Better, better, better, better, better, oh!
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Na na na, na-na na na
Na-na na na, Poldi
Charlie, nooooo! I absolutely HATE it when “Team X has not won as Stadium Y for Z years” and similar is brought up before games – that always means that team X will win π
http://www.football365.com/mediawatch/7722780/Mediawatch
Some absolutely splendid stuff from Mediawatch today.
Re: Tabs @251, This time you have once again achieved your very high standards. Singalong time! I’ll bring my parasol. π
tabs@251: heh! π
Good thing we signed Arteta because I think his name lends itself to even more songs than Podolski. Great use of Arteta within 251, Tabs, by the way. Most songs about Podolski really seem to be using Lu(kas) anyway as the main source of rhymes, not his last name.
Signed, Judge #489
Cheers Lars , 8Ball π
Lars , you at the Tollie on Sat ?
Ollie , great stuff from Mediawatch , cheers for linking .
Trev @246. Excellent and up to your very high standards too. π
Re: Goonertown @245. Not even worth asking. Snir knows all when it comes to transfers, even before the clubs do. π
Tabs, excellent at 251!!!!
How about this one I saw on Facebook to the tune of “Who let the dogs out?”
LUKAS PODOLSKI,
LU-LU-LU-LU
LUKAS PODOLSKI,
LU-LU-LU-LU
Being a Trini I had no choice but to share π
Re: Catalan @228. Jack, or Jack Russell if we are being expansive and don’t care about confusing the dog about his breeding (He is not a Jack Russell, more of a mini shepherd mutt.) Anyway, it is Jack as in the dog’s name in this song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aNN9X2oQbA
Go Jack! Later we might shorten his name to LJW.
Ollie@253: Mediawatch was on top form today.
I really can’t understand why being the people’s choice should qualify anyone for anything, unless there is an election involved. With the exception of the estimable members of this bar, most people know sod all about what it takes to manage a professional football team and even less about managing international ones. The Sun’s condemnation of a highly qualified experienced candidate says all you need to know about the standards of journalism at that particular publication, and I use the term journalism very loosely in this case.
8Ball , presumably you couldn’t name your new pup after your HT team . Wouldn’t have been fair to inflict the name “Chokers” on him would it . π
Tabs. Heh. We’ll call him Numpty on Thursdays. π
Tabs@261: top stuff.
We should compile these tracks onto a single word document, print it out and hand it to gooners in front of the stadium during the final home game against Norwich. Get everyone practicing during the close season….
Who’s got a guitar ? I’m quite happy to play the maracas .
Heh 8Ball .
Cheers Ned , and wise words on The Sun . Why don’t people just stop buying it ?
Dr.C @ #250 – It’s quite remarkable isn’t it? I just hope he adapts quickly to The Prem and lives us to the hype that we’re creating for him. A magic, early signing though π
Dr. C @ 250 – Song?
tabs@257: yup, at the Tollie post-game on Saturday. Won’t make it pre-game for various reasons.
Cool Lars, didn’t know whether you were around.
267: tabs is Bez? :s
I’ve got his moves down to a tee Ollie π
And also replicate his lack of a single cogent thought come to think of it !
We can call our supergroup “The Happy Saturdays” .
Good to hear Lars .
AL @269 π
8ball – good to see you’ve snuck in an Arsenal reference!
Tabs @251 – blimey! π
Exclusive: Snir beaten to transfer news.
Jack Wilshere to Arsenal – Like a New Signing !!! π
http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/arsenal-legend-campbell-calls-time-on-career
I thought he’d retired already.
Somehow this reminds me of ‘Andrew Cole retires from International Football’.
Mr C,
just to let you know I am writing Lars up for a two week course of uppers / downers ? – sod it, let’s make it both – to try to get him through the last fortnight of the season.
He is again displaying all the signs of mancifergiepurplefaciitis, such is his current level of unease before each of our, and all our rivals remaining games.
I trust I have your agreement,
Mr T.
8ball – Dog names: Feisty – Friday ??? π
Drug him up, Mr T, drug him up.
We always have the baseball bats as back up. I’m told Carlos is itching to use them. It’s been a while.
On Lars ? Mais non ! A true voice of sanity .
Carlos is French????
@252
I hate “team X”. π
To the good doctors T and C:
I would happily take any drugs you pass on to me. While Wolfie might appreciate squeaky bums, I would not mind being able to relax my posterior muscles slightly.
zico@282: yeah, I know – aren’t they just a bunch of cunts, that team?
@ tabs 251 and CoR 260, brilliant chants. I can surely imagine the “who let the dogs out” tune being a real hit, it’s certainly got that lively spirit about it like the original Lu Lu Lu Lukas Podolski. π
Waiting for the Bolton game in real anticipation at the moment. I’m a massive fan of Ryo, watched his every game in Feyenoord, and tonight he has a real opportunity to endear himself to Arsenal fans, and perhaps more importantly, his manager. I sure hope he lives up to the occasion and give the Spud’s fullbacks a real spanking. He must have learnt a thing or two since his last game against ‘Arry at the FA cup.
Ryo Ryo Ryo, Ryo Mi-ya-i-chi…!!!
Lars @283
I have a feeling that Wolfie is going to be in touch to help you relax those posterior muscles……
The Scene : Feelgood Mansions
Dr Feelgood is rummaging through a box of CDs and throwing them one by one in a heap on the floor. Β Roxette walks in and gives him a less than quizzical look, so used is she to his manic moments, that this hardly registers on the scale of distraction.
Feelgood (anguished) : “Where is it? Β Where the flying feck, is, IT?”
Roxette : “If you’re looking for White Riot, the CID took that away as evidence after your last attempt at livening up last summer’s street party.”
Feelgood : “I’m looking for the Beatles. Β Beatles songs. Β All the rage you know…..”
Roxette (under her breath) Β “Act your age, more like.”
Feelgood : “I just need to find the one about Maxine’s Silver Hamster….”
Roxette (sarcastically) : “One of their best. Β Why?”
Feelgood : “So I can change the words…….”
Mrs Feelgood wearily walks away……
What for Doc ? Is The Quackery now using suppositories ? If so , where are mine ? π
Maxwell, Zico, Maxwell
@286 π
Oxon = whoosh π
@286 π
I thought Oxon was one of the bright ones ? π
Lars @283 π
The Beatles, Track xx?
I’d like to see Lu Podolski
In Arsene Wenger’s garden in N5,
He’d score and shout
And run about
In Arsene Wenger’s garden in N5.
He could be so happy in Highb’ry,
He’d even share the pens with RvP . . .
He’d score for fun
Be joint Top Gun,
In Arsene Wenger’s garden in N5.
I’ve said it before.
I’ll say it again.
Barking.
Every man jack of you π
Now, if Carlsberg did Wednesday nights, Bolton would win and Chelsea would draw with the Geordies.
NBN @262 –
quite agree re Hodgson and The Sun.
‘Arry was the people’s choice ? Who did they ask ?
He was the journo’s choice simply ‘cos he never stops talking to them.
Evening Major !!
Now if you’d just leave me to it ‘Holic, I’m quietly self-assisting here as I haven’t scored in weeks.
Ooh, that wasn’t meant to sound quite like that –
*blushes and runs out*
300.
Soon.
*kicks ball towards Carlos*
Evening ‘holics,
Feels like I’ve stumbled onto an X-Factor-esque blog! So who’s the unfortunate cunt that’s Simon Cowell and who’s Louis Walsh?
And who’s going through to the next stages?
Tabs @251, Top adaptation of a classic – always a popular choice!
CoR @260, Not sure about this “urban” stuff but I guess it’s what you young kids like! π
Now for my contribution accompanied by the White Stripes!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahTjafa_Z58
Ahem! (clears throat in preparation)
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“He’s gonna fight ’em all.”
“A team of cunts”
“couldn’t hold him back.”
“He’s gonna rip ’em up.”
“Leave em lyin’ down”
“behind his back.”
“And they’ll be talking”
“to themselves at night”
“because they can’t forget.”
“Back and forth”
“through their mind”
“behind a cigarette.”
“And the message”
“coming from their eyes”
“says leave it alooone!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
“Luu, Lu-Luu-kas Po-dolll-ski!”
Kicks it back to the flame haired poacher …
Notices that Carlos’ not quite gettin’ there!
Greedy bastard !
Opportunistic goal, DanC, well played.
Bloody selfish, I call it !
*stamps foot and demands to be subbed off*
Trev/Fawlty @ #292
Love it! Starkey’s almost finest moment?
Come on Bolton!
Cheers Ollie! Always nice to top-up the weekly wage with a goal bonus!
Trev @301,
Heh! “He loves to come from behind the Dapper fella!” π
@ 260 Cannons of Rhetoric
How about this one I saw on Facebook to the tune of βWho let the dogs out?β
LUKAS PODOLSKI,
LU-LU-LU-LU
LUKAS PODOLSKI,
LU-LU-LU-LU
Love this one – can see it taking off.
“He’s not afraid to attack from deep with decisive penetration whilst others limply stand by and wait for the balls to come their way” Alan Hansen says on MoTD! His criticism of “Trev” is excessive in the eyes of the Jug-Eared one! Harsh!!!
Right, kick-off in about a minute at the Bus Stop and at the Reebok. Gentlemen, clench your buttocks! π
Bollocks Ryo’s not starting. Hat trick off the bench then. FOYS!
Relax Lars and let it all flow π
Imagine an attacking force of seven
It’s easy if you try
Striking fear below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people signing everyday
Imagine Theo, RvP & Poldi
It isn’t hard to do
Interchanging from the flanks thru the middle
Midfield hitting a goal or two
Imagine Poldi ripping the totts piece by piece
You, you may say
I’m a fanatic Gooner, but I’m not the only one
I hope some day you’ll join us
And all supporters will be as one
Imagine our possession
I wonder if you can
Poldi’s speed and hunger
Pressing man for man
Imagine all the teams fearing all over the world
You may say
I’m a fanatic Gooner, but I’m not the only one
I hope some day you’ll join us
And supporters will live as one
Come on the Trotters! Do it for your parent club and for Fabrice! Remarkable recovery! Hope his presence’s enough to feck-up the LWC! K.Davis to make the difference!
Come on the Barcodes! CissΓ© to down the Chel$ki cunts!!!
Great scenes, Fabrice at the Reebok
GNTT @313,
Nice! π
Great scenes at the Reebok with Fabrice Muamba! Wonderful! π
Come on Bolton! Come on Ryo!
I am watching the Chelsea game, have to say that Torres has looked like a completely different player since his goal v Barca. Was it really all down to lacking confidence?
Chelsea 0 – 1 Newcastle, Papiss Cisse. First real scoring chance of the game, awful defending by Chelsea.
Zico@291 I merely spake of the possessor of the silver hammer don’cha know.
Chelsea have fallen apart after the goal and are now all over the place. They don’t really seem very focused, to be honest.
Oxon = whoosh MkII π
Half time at the bus stop, Newcastle deservedly ahead. Ba hit the crossbar just before half time. Chelsea are fucking awful and haven’t been anywhere near scoring so far.
@ Lars
I’m rooting for Chelski in a reverse jinx kind of way. Seems to be working! Sp*rs – not so much.
Fuuuuuuck, 1-0 to the LWC’s. Fucking ref missed a clear handball that led to a Sp*rs corner from which they scored.
Bolton are honking
Sandrocunt using his hands to good effect. Fuckkk
Looks like we will have to win both our final games. Not that I expected anything else, mind.
who is the ref?
CissΓ© = Rapidly becoming a Barcode Legend!
Modric = Midget LWC!
Mike Dean π
@327,
Mike Dean! Cunt!
bolton need to be brave and attack , very negative so far.
How that wasn’t a penalty for Ngog is quite baffling. Fucking Dean. Kaboul was clearly pulling Ngog’s shirt trying to break his balance.
Omg Boyata had all the time in the world… To clear the ball to row Z…
The cunt who runs the site I am watching the Bolton v Spuds game on must be a LWC wanker – he keeps showing their goal. That’s 6-times so far….tosser!
I did not expect Bolton to win but they are capable of getting a draw. however the target for us is still 2 wins to do the job ourselves. anythiong we get tonight will be a bonus
Tiote being stretchered off the pitch following a bad landning after an aerial duel. It took a good few minutes to get him on the stretcher, think he hit his head really hard when he hit the ground.
Goaaaaal Bolton!
1-1 niiiccce
Better, Bolton 8)
get in
fantastic, come on Bolton.
Bolton bossing it now..
Jammy bastards – first attack of the second half )0;
Nope, I was right first time, Bolton are honking.
Oh feck.
Its over now at 1-3 surely
game over I’m afraid.
Well, wasn’t expecting anything from Bolton tonight anyway so not much to say about that. Chelsea don’t really look like scoring either, about ten minutes to go. They have subbed on both Lampard and Drogba but aren’t creating any real chances.
This is a depressing evening.
I suppose we definitely have to win our last 2 games now.
Tough but not impossible.
That what poor sides do, they get themselves level then go and implode afterwards. Lets hope our players were not banking on Bolton or anyone else, we have to do the job ourselves, simple.
Wenger’s coat: well, if our players are hoping for others to sort us out then we are really in trouble. To be honest, I hope they are just ignoring the matches tonight to focus on Saturday.
Ooooh, so, so close to a Chelsea goal there from a corner. Headed away on the line.
Its getting worst with Spurs bumping up their goal difference
Tim Krul are Kruling it and receives a yellow card for it. Ten minutes added on, which seems about right since Tiote was on the floor for a long, long time.
2-0 Barcodes …sensational
OH WHAT A FUCKING GOAL BY CISSE!
Not sure he really meant it that way but that’s game over at the Bridge.
Lars. I hope so but I can’t help thinking like us the players will be watching and cheering on Bolton. goal difference is reduced to 2 so the players will really need to get themselves for 2 cup finals.
What a 2nd goal from Cisse the best of the season, you have to watch it. simply the best
Oh he meant it Lars, he hit it with the outside of his foot, that is not a pass he meant to curl it into the net.
It as to be the best goal of the season no doubt
That goal from cisse was truly jaw-dropping, in every sense of the word. And as I am typing this a Geordies’ belly left me speechless as well.
I wanted to see Chgelsea play a decent side and not park the bus. they tried to play football tonight and they exposed themslves as a poor side.
Well, fair play to Newcastle. Chelsea just didn’t turn up and NUFC took full advantage.
Squeaky bum time now in full effect π
Ha ha ha ha that was the belly of the season
What a player that Papiss Cisse is! Please do the same to the Oily cunts and that fecker Na$ri on the weekend!
Bolton; I guess all too emotional an evening for ’em!
LWCs; feckers! 3 counter-attacking goals?! A Champions League side? My arse!
Now I’m really really really glad Citeh won on Monday.
They might still fuck it up on Sunday, but at least they have something to play for.
Bolton vs Scum is a very unfortunate result.
And obviously it also means Villa aren’t going to feel too threatened by relegation now and will also surrender meekly to Spurs.
Fucking Bolton cunts.
DanC, you’re mad. I’ll be supporting City very much on Sunday. For the second game running.
A high score for us is needed on Saturday. Spurs look like they have their tails up now.
Newcastle’s remaining games (both very tough) mean if there had to be a winner, I prefer it to be them to be honest. Night could have been better, but not a complete disaster. Onward to three big points on Saturday hopefully!
The spuds can have their tails up as high as they like, if we win our games there’s bugger all they can do about it.
Our players need to make sure they are at their best on Saturday. a below par performance will not do.
Well said Charlie@370. Sp*ds can enjoy their goal difference as much as they like while they look at our extra point come the end of the season and pray that Bayern do the business.
May 13 St Totts Day then (0;
Two games.
6 points.
One pub.
Many pints.
Multiple hangovers.
Roll on Saturday. 8)
I’m tempted to say Villa could give Spurs something to think about, but I rather not put my hopes up. Lets finish the job
Couldn’t believe Cisse’s second goal, have to agree, goal of the season. Truly awesome. And seeing Fabrice, how could you not believe in the man upstairs.
Mr Coat, I don’t think it’ll come down to goal difference, I think Spurs will win their last two now, so we need to win our two too.
So its May 13 St Totteringham Day then (0;
So I guess we’ll find out what the lads are made of? Win the next two matches and claim third… or…
(I don’t want to think about that.)
Come on the Arse! Stake your claim! Lay down your marker! (Insert trite exhortation of your choosing.) Bottomline is we have to finish third (and ahead of the Spunk).
I’m with you Ollie re: #366. Say what you will about petrol dollars buying talent, but I have no real problem with mercenaries as long as everyone is upfront about their intentions.
I really would have had a problem if the WEAKEST Manure team in a decade was able to win the league. THAT would really be saying something about quality in the Prem, and it would have been none too good.
BMBD.
Uh uh G(NT)T. We beat Norwich Saturday and it’s St Totts on Sunday as Villa stuff them.
OLLIE: Fulham will nick a point a spoil their party…
abb, the answer to that is unfortunately extremely simple : Spurs won tonight. π
Trivial, sorry.
Great to see him there though. Well, if I had watched the game, but you know what I mean.
Oxon: I’ll take that!
That’s the plan Oxon, but have you seen Villa lately? It’s going down to the wire.
Lonestar, on top of that, there are far more players I hate at ManU that at City.
There is no way my despise of the insignificant Nasri can equal my hatred for Evra, Rooney, Fergusion, Nani just to name a few.
Right, time to bid you goodnight. We’ll only depend on ourselves, so first step London on saturday, to sing and support the boys in red&white (they’re fucking dynamite).
I’m surprised at you ‘holic. Are you saying that a team has to be half-way reasonable to beat the LWCs these days? Surely the world can’t have changed that much.
Villa are not getting anything out of Sunday’s game. Looting Town will win that one easily.
Ollie @367,
Well, I guess we have very different views on that! Why you’d rather they won the title, I don’t understand?!
I have absolutely no desire for those mercenaries to win anything whatsoever! I despise SAF and the red Mancs but clearly not as much as the blue Mancs!
The scoreline flattered the LWCs, they weren’t anywhere near as good as 4 goals to 1!
But what an annoying cunt that Tim Krul is: Gets booked for time wasting with 10 added minutes to go AND goes ever slower….SIGN HIM!!
They’ve sure as hell got to be better than Villa π
Oh well, May 14th it is then. Worse things happen at sea.
COYG CCMUED
Fuck it I am not going to stress about it…I reckon we are better than all the teams below us so ….
Jeez man. May 13th.
We’ve made our bed. Now we have to lie in it.
Still not sure with Cisse’s first goal that his first touch was intentional, but the second was fantastic. His second goal was just incredible. You could go a whole career and not hit one like that. It is in the Roberto Carlos class for swerviness.
Better than the two (count ’em Tiny Totts) above us too.
Raking pass out of defense…darts upfield
Outside of the boot!
Volleys wide
Hey ho and sh*t, b*ll*cks, c*nt!
To the wire it is ‘Holics.
Time to emit high pitched tones from our buttocks.
Roll-on Saturday!
Oh, was that a Cisse wonder-strike? π
Bingo! Nice one TS…Ooops Oxon (0;
Guys, one match at a time.
I’m putting money on Wolfie’s speedoes matching his parasol on Saturday.
What time is Tollington kick off barman? (I may need to have a word with the pilot). π
Roberto Carlos swerviness:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnB_4Jtfy6A
Well in, TS.
DanC @389 ,
I’m sure Ollie has no real interest in who wins the League . It is essential City beat Newcastle to knock the Toon into a position where they can’t catch us .
Arsenal always first !
Last time I’m supporting a bunch of Northerners – pie-eating whippet-walking pidgeon-fancying clog-wearing tossers .
Norwich and West Brom – Doesn’t sound too bad if you say it quickly .
Just do it Arsenal .
Dr.z, I’ll check with Louise @TheTollington. Are you following?
lets not bother talking about Villa and the rest. We need to win our games, it is as simple as that. It would be nice to have some breathing space but that might just put the players in their comfort zone. The result tonight should be enough to warn them, the job is far from done
Oh yeah, TS
I just keep forgetting to look (or follow if that’s the twatty term) – hence my response to tweets a day later π
For once I’ll be really rooting for one team in the CL final π
Chelski about to implode in 3…2…1..
As for us nothing changed. 2 cup finals ahead!
Like zico said, one game at a time. And if we fuck this up, we have no one to blame. Two games against opposition with nothing to play for – these are games we should win, period. No “playing maybe a little bit with the handbrake on”, please.
Oh well, time to feck right off to bed.
Pints on the bar for everyone!
lars ” hand brakes on ” and the other “lacked a bit of sharpness” none of that malarky I hope. get in, get the job done, that is what we want to see in the next 2 games.
Ticket exchange has delivered two for Saturday and Master Fin is one happy bunny.
Well if that doesn’t concentrate their minds I don’t know what will.
We beat Norwich and WBA and we’re third. Up to us. After the start if this season i’d have bitten your hand of for that
Fuck the rest, concentrate on us. We’re in a better position than both of them. We call the shots.
Over to you, Arsene. Find that handbrake and chuck it.
Cheers Lars – I’ll have a pint of vodka please. Because I am now officially on holiday until Tuesday π
For those like me who missed Cisse’s goal: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIb77UjB6G4
Should be ten again Saturday, trusty zico π
CG @ 414 — exactly. The results today may have not made our job any easier, but focus and concentration should not be an issue. The minds of the players should now be fully clear and not hoping for a second chance.
We actually have been in this position in this season before. The two CL qualifying ties against a very good Udinese side at the beginning of the season with an unsettled team — Jenk on the RB and Sagna playing left — were pivotal matches that we managed very well with quality and maturity. The (somewhat) must win home game against a high-flying Dortmund was death with class and maturity.
There is no reason we cannot replicate performances of that type of composure, quality and confidence.
Hell of a goal, but I would rate TH14 v ManUre better.
@418 — I meant ‘dealt’ with… no Freudian slip that, but auto-speller caprice … π
Thx Dr F. “… death with…” had me very confused π
Hey snowy.
TS – well snuck @400 and ‘Ta’ for your @305.
Cheers for the link Matt – some goal indeed.
Trouble is we really need to cheer for the Middle Eastlanders now π
Doctor Faustus – I’m cured ! π
Trev,
I, for one, will gladly sell my soul…
Let’s focus on the Norwich game, 3 points essential. Then, if Sunday results go our way…….
COYRRR.
Evening all. Not a night of great results for us but I agree entirely with Dr @414 and many others. 2 games to go. Must won both. In a mixed season we know we would have settled for this at Christmas. Funny thing is I still can’t help feeling that third should be as good as sown up by now. But it isn’t and this is not the time to moan about it. Time to man up and make sure that we do enough to get the two wins we need.
Both Cisse strikes were top drawer. Not bad value at Β£10 million? Now, how much did the Spuds pay for Bentley?
FFS – today’s result means we HAVe to win our two remaining games no matter what as Spurs will most probably win theirs.
That also means Spurs won’t be leapfrogged by Newcastle which is a bummer :/
I am truly shaking from the next two games.
W.B.A won’t be as comfortable as it was at home that’s for sure.
Cheers Guvnor @ 417
Last flight from this end (last Friday) was aborted on take off – won’t accept that as an excuse on Saturday π
I like the fact we play first at the weekend. Do our job properly and we go 4 points ahead of the Geordies and the Spuds. All the pressure is then back on them with both having tricky games. It also puts the chavs well and truly to bed.
Bring it on.
Carlos @406,
I’m expecting a draw for the Barcodes with the Oily Mercs! I feckin’ hate nouveau riche cunts who think they can get whatever they want because they have somehow “come into money”!
Citeh represent EVERYTHING that is wrong with football and the popular worldwide culture we all live in now! Anything that supports & perpetuates it, and undermines the significance of hard-work and hard graft to attain success in life, I object to in the strongest terms!
I’ve never been worried about the Barcodes catching us! 4th they might perhaps get (and i hope that they do) but they won’t finish above us! The LWCs and the Bus Stop have always been my concerns but now that Chel$ki are all but out of the CL qualifying places, it’s the LWCs!
St Totteringham’s day will materialise for us but sadly the celebration will begin in the Black Country rather than at the Grove, as all would have actially hoped!
Not much to say, is there. We know what needs to be done.
Saturday’s game is monumental now. Win that and I sense we’ll get over the line, one way or another.
A round to all those ‘holics still drinking please bar-keep and I bid you all ‘night! Salut!
I’m a bit surprise about the reaction of tonights results, as if we expected Bolton to get anything. nothinhg has changed really. It was going to be tight, Wenger said the point against Stoke might prove vital and so far that is still the case. Luckily we are playing 2 teams who don’t normally park the bus, as I feel we do struggle against teams who put 11 behind the ball. i assume they will be open games and that might suit us.
I’m scared of these next two games.
I’m scared :'(
Dr Faustus: Death or dishonor! I like the cut of your jib my friend (0;
Shut up Snir FFS! You are so uptight. When I was your age I’d be stoned all the time…why the fuck are you wasting your youth being sober & scared? Man the fuck up man! (0;
I’m not one to be stoned.. Not my thing, I’m an alcohol guy!
And I gotta be focused anyway, it’s finals week!
Oh forgot! I thought it was the footie that was making you scared…(0;
No doubt about it…Arsenal has to focus on the 2 teams they have to play and forget about other results. Fuck everybody else, especially the scum! We got beat at home against Wigan, but can’t let that happen again, not the last home game of the season! The away game against WBA is going to be tricky but it’s def doable. 3rd is ours atm and the ball is on our side of the court. Let’s finish the season on a high now.
Arsenal!
Dr Z,
Regrettably Saturday will see me in Beijing and not at The Tollie where, by all that is right, I should be.
Should the situation arise where Holic is whispering in your left ear and TaBS in your right that “solids are for wimps” or some such other gobbledegook balderdash……..PLEASE remember the sanctity of the haddock and retreat gracefully to The Chip Inn fish Bar where wise men live to fight another day and Guisseppe will happily sell you a 4 pounds 20 supper for 5 pounds 60, freshly wrapped with vinegar and salt thrown in for free.
Don’t let the speedo clad, mind bending, Snowy’s top clad lawyer to the man with the cleft feet lead you to peculiar places of the mind where wayward souls are regularly sold for eternity. Remember your womenfolk and the embarrassment that throwing up on your daughter’s carpet brings down on that impressionable young head of yours.
I know these words are like Mars Bars before the deep fryer – but I had to try. Enjoy and be safe.
GT – I’m just not confident leading up to these last two fixtures.
I don’t know why, but I just have a bad feeling.
I think this nervous feeling is what makes the victories all the more sweeter me thinks.
Kinda like ace-ing an exam after suffering nervous butterflies the night before.
We are the Arsenal and we are the best.
COYG
Fucking hell, the Internet is daft.
Sunday night we had to win both remaining games to ensure third place.
Monday, we sign podolski and we start celebrating as if we’d won the CL
Wednesday and other teams lose. People start having a go at arsenal as if it’s there fault.
Thursday morning, we have to win both remaining games to ensure third place.
Man up. Speedoes in place, here we go for the weekend.
Disclaimer; I was guilty of podolski fever. π
Snir, chill out! Don’t be so negative π
We will beat Norwich at home. I am not seeing beyond that at the moment. One game at a time
Where fault?
CG – I know all this, but today I was swept with a weird feeling that we’ll blow it. Dunno why, but it’s just there :\
Heh BtM,
That’s so Roxette!
“And make sure and have something to eat…….”
Snir,
I think your crystal balls need re-calibrating.
Remember Wigan π
Heh @ 445
Snir
I know, I know. That’s fear. Embrace it. Harness it. It is life.
In the meantime, Dr C has some pills for you…. π
I’d take any pill right now.
This week has been hell.
No the games at Old Trafford or at Blackburn this season – those were parts of weeks from hell. Or January, an entire month from hell! This isn’t anywhere near as bad at this point.
Er…unless you meant it from a general perspective rather than a footballing one!
What a great company, now that I am starting the new job, it looks like some people in the old division are begging for me and a couple of others to come back (albeit as part of Customer Delivery rather than TEC due to administrative situation). A bit late, isn’t it?
Ah, Patient GangGoolie. Please come in.
Symptoms? Nausea in stomach? Tingling in balls? Buttock clenching? Tremors? Heightened clarity of senses?
Diagnosis: You’re alive! Embracing all the experiences of life. Not sitting in some grey drab world without danger.
Advice: Bring it on. Grab it. Enjoy the adrenaline rush, whatever the outcome. This is what it’s all about. You’ll still wake up tomorrow.
Fucking brilliant. Love it.
Request for drugs denied. Get out there man. π
Thank you doctor.
You’ve just rekindled my fire.
Have to wake up for my Economics final, maybe I’ll figure out a wage structure for AFC π
What a rubbish doctor.
“Request for drugs denied?”
Cruel to be kind, Dr Z.
Sometimes less is more. Less for Gang Goolie, more for us. π
Steve T@426: agree with every word.
Mr C@454: while I too have been a bit nervous lately, I would like to point out that I actually enjoy it and if we finish fifth then so be it. We can’t “win” every time, can we? At least these past few weeks have been a hell of a lot more exciting and fun that last season or the one before that. And besides, as I have said many times before – our long-term future is decided by how we handle the summer transfer business, not where we finish this season. I don’t think missing out on the Champions League is neccessarily a disaster, we are still a big enough club to be able to bounce back from that. And yes, that would assume that the club has learned from last summer but that still applies if we finish third because another summer like the last one and I will guarantee you that by this time next year we will be talking about our chances of at least getting into the Europa League.
Dr.C @ #414 – Well said old bean, could not agree more. Our ‘need to win’ is what competition is all about. Should we secure the requisite points over the next two games then it will make our achievement all the sweeter. As the old adage goes, when the going gets tough the tough get going.
Come On You Rip Roaring Reds!!!
PS: Stocks in the CMC are running low, hence rationing by the good doctors. A little dose of reality may do us all good π
BtM @ #440
Heh! masterful. I will be thinking of you tucking into snake and rice when I chow-down post match. Hope you get to secure yourself a decent video stream come 7:45PM and lead a merry band of Chinese folk in songs for The Arsenal.
Safe travels.
Lars @458
Exactly. I’ve enjoyed this season, with it’s ridiculous highs and lows much much more than the previous two.
There’s a spirit and quality in this side that has been missing since Gallas had his self-indulgent sulk on the centre circle at St Andrews
Well said again Dr.C.
FYI, there is plenty of Sudocrem in the CMC. You may wish to add it to your prescriptions list.
Too late for a chart entry??
With all apologies to The Kinks;
Now he’s not the world’s most fashionable man,
Sounds like a Pole, dresses like a Ger-man,
Podolski,
Lu Lukas Podolski,
Lu Lukas Podolski
Well, he’s not dumb but he can’t understand
why Samir looks like a girl, dresses like a man,
Podol-ski
Lu Lukas Podolski
Lu Lukas POdolski
We’ve heard him say
he wants Robin to stay
We hope it will always be that way
With Podolski
Lu Lukas Podolski
Lu Lukas Podolski
Dr.z @ #409
Tollie opens at 10AM on Saturday. Just sayin…
‘holic will be opening the gates as always.
Eurostar seem to have added 6 minutes to usual journey time so I should be there a bit after 11.
Sorry Ollie, just had a vision of ‘Holic surounded by fluffy clouds, standing in a white robe at the pearly gates holding a harp.
Only the harp part of that sentence is even remotely accurate.
Dr.C, can you please reduce my prescription?
TS @464
Late again. I refer you to the man ITK @ 417 π
Oops! On well, such good news it was repeated twice π³
Pearly Gates?
My dear boy, I would be in Heavenson Square Garden bopping along to Marley, Hendrix, and Moon with backing singers Minnie Ripperton and Etta James.
DanC @ 298/300, quality π
Nice assist Carlos π
DanC @ 313! Woah, and down them Cisse did!
abb @ 376, couldn’t say it better myself :’)
Oxon @ 392/394, maybe you need to visit the CMC mate… 8)
NBN @ 395, Roberto himself would be proud I think.
TS @ 400, what a rallying call century!
Catalan/Faustus @ 414/418, my thoughts exactly.
Trev/Catalan @ 423/424, real comedians you two π
Steve T @ 429, I’m all fired up for the game π
DanC @ 430, good to see a fellow advocate of hard work, but I just won’t be able to stand Na$ri being vindicated for leaving Arsenal for the Moo-lah by winning a trophy off the bench!
Snir @ 434, I’ve never seen you in such a state mate… π
Heh Catalan @ 443, honesty is the best policy, instill THAT in your kids π
@ 450, woah! :O I think you’re the one that is wise beyond years… π
Ollie @ 453, π Ahh that’s rich of them eh?
TS @ 460, brutal man π
Heh Maestro π
BtM @440 , heh , very good π Mind you you’re sacked as my PR man π
As I have already told you in the back channels , a fear of the fish is a very wise and circumspect position to adopt . Untrustworthy fuckers ! π
There once was a tabs in the Tollie,
Who met all his friends by the Brolly,
He drank all his beer,
but the fish he did fear,
For surely the haddock is folly !
Mr C @various – on form today Sir π π
466 TS. You missed a trick: I’m pretty sure ‘holic doesn’ t drink Harp. π
Remind me again why you’re looking for a Poldi song?
His current song is the catchiest in Europe!
Lu Lu Lu Lukas Podolski !
Catalan / Mr C – several hehs π
Don’t forget fretters, that every other major club in Europe has failed to make the Champions League at least once during our unbroken 15 year run in the competition – and they have all come back ok.
Even Barcelona and Bayern Munich have missed out since our last absence.
I agree with Catalan that this season, despite all the traumas, has been great fun and the feeling at the end of it is far more positive than it was after the last two or three.
Snir @473 –
because we can, and otherwise we just fret about the next two games. Look into your balls Snir, and as long as they are still red and white – rejoice ! π
Ob-la-di ‘ell – a virtual run to the hills…are alive with sound (turned down) of muuusic – phew???
oops “the” and oops Trev turned up…
Trev – You could also say that once you’re bounced out of the top four it’s hard to return.
Just look at Liverpool.
I’m browsing through an intranet page which is kind of listing all our products, so I unsubscribe to old ones I won’t be working with any more, and subscribe to updates on my new field.
In the ‘Services’ department, we seem to have ‘Escort Services’. heh
Good Afternoon to all you Holics. I have already started my pre-interlull training: Dug out Fever Pitch and rather than read selected chapters – as was my initial inclination – I decided to read it cover to cover including press reviews, introduction and the ISBN barcode at the back! Ah well better be prepared I suppose….I highly recommend it to all Holics – although I can’t image that there are any Gooners out there that hasn’t read Fever Pitch.
In the intro Nick Hornby describes how long it takes him to drift off into Arsenal reverie once he gets up in the morning – he reckons that he can take any random subject and in three bars he can bring it around to something Arsenal..So I decided to check myself to see how bad I was…well I have so far failed to spot any discernible gap between any random thought and something about the Arsenal (or something or someone on Goonerholic)…I am even thinking about Arsenal when I am pretending to be discussing something completely different with my wife! Jeez. Fuck knows how I will survive the summer at this rate )0;
SG @ 477 — Even if the worst happens — and I am with others in encouraging you not to think in those terms, healthy dose of courage and optimism are all you need — I don’t think we are quite like Liverpool and would allow ourselves to become like one. Unless the club suddenly loses all sense of proportion and fire Arsene and thrash around convulsively with strange decisions and money wasting sprees…
As Trev mentioned, our uninterrupted CL run has really been extraordinary. Just like everyone else I would like this to continue forever, but the realist in me says even going by the law of averages we are surely going to have a bizarre season or two to miss out.
And this one was a bizarre season alright, let us not forget that.
And yet CL football next year is entirely up to us. Let us not forget that too. π
Just waiting for confirmation of Arsenal signing Jan Vertonghen from Ajax, fee agreed #AFC
A twitter account I found to be very reliable. Has predicted many transfers right.
http://www.metro.co.uk/sport/football/897808-arsenal-open-transfer-talks-with-ajax-over-7m-jan-vertonghen-deal
And this is from Jamie Sanderson (young guns) who is NOT a bullshitter.
LEGRash, Snir?
Agent ITK right Snir? Pretty annoying… π
Ollie@478, is your new job with the U.S. secret service?
No Wind. Someone else.
I don’t like that dude.
Whatever one thinks of the Special One, seven league titles in 10 seasons across four countries is impressive.
NBN
Fair to say that he knows what he is doing!
He’s still a smarmy cunt though, Ned. π
Whatever one thinks of the Special one , he’s still a cunt !
Err apologies Dr Z , I see you got there first π
Absolutely no apology required – in fact, go on, say it again. π
So if media reports from the past few days are to be belived, we have not been in any talks at all for Vertonghen, but we have also already signed him while we have just made a tentative bid for Β£7m. Not to mention the fact that Tottenham is the only club to have talked to his agent. But he has also received bids from Liverpool and Manchester United.
Personally, I believe it. See, if it’s in the papers or on the Internet it must be true…
Bottom of the League in France is very interesting. Auxerre just won in Dijon and are now out of the relegation zone (on goal difference).
They looked dead and buried only 2 or 3 weeks ago.
The Special cunt winning the Spanish League would have been very impressive if he’d done it with Valencia maybe.
But with Real? A massive meh.
Perhaps he wants to take over at PSG soon?
Lars, it’s especially true if it’s on twitter. ;D
The Special Cunt – i reckon that nails it Ollie – a drink, i think – is on the bar from me for thee squire…cheers and booze!
Heeelllllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooooooooooooooo – lurkers!
It’s a keeper.
One more season at real Madrid and then man city or PSG.
Clever selection of teams by The Special Cunt
NO!
YeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
A big thank you to the special cunt – couldn’t have got here without him!!!
I should i say there!
Pardon, i’m overcome with the excitement of it all – i couldn’t have got “there” without him…
And a ta to CG for the assist too
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>