A Man’s A Fan For A’ That – A Guest Post
Feb 25th, 2014 by 'holic
A week without a game, and along comes the inimitable zicoinexile with a more than welcome guest post. With so many, it seems, currently re-examining their options for supporting the institution that is ingrained in us Dr z reflects on his own experiences, and a fascinating read I found it too.
Many may not be too familiar with the play on the words of Burns above, but they formed in my mind when I recently stumbled upon an immediately recognisable, but always absurd, online argument.
At first glance, it was nothing but a run of the mill pissing-contest. One bloke claimed because he was born around Finsbury Park and once had a season ticket for the West Stand at Highbury, that HIS Arsenal credentials infinitely outweighed those of his co-respondent, who as far as I could gather, had never been to either the Emirates or Highbury. I never found out which particular parish he or she came from.
I quickly calculated that my own Arsenal pedigree would probably register about “5% pure” on Finsbury-Park-Boy’s worthi-meter. I had never owned a season ticket, and had ceased regular visits to Highbury some time before George Graham’s appointment began to steer us on to a new and victorious, trajectory.
Not really a fan, then.
Let me say, there have been some mitigating circumstances. Not actually living in London being the obvious one, but there were others. For instance, when I did get to the occasional match, I was treated to the talents of Gus Caesar. Now I probably shouldn’t single out Gus for any more derisory treatment than that which could apply to any number of ordinary players. I simply want to emphasise that, at this point, Wengerball was about as distant as the Moon.
This might lead you to conclude that I had gone back, taken a quick look, misread the future and voted with my feet – not able to see what was forming. The truth is, though, I never really stopped “following” Arsenal, I just found myself with very limited opportunities to do so. Geography, the economy, matrimony, paternity – you get the drift.
But I still considered myself a fan.
The 1989 Arsenal side seemed to be universally disliked in my neck of the woods, and I was continually challenged by anyone with a passing interest in English football, to respond to the cliched ” boring, boring Arsenal” jibe as if saying this out loud, and often, somehow represented “a debate”.
From Shankly onwards, it was trendy where I grew up for punters to claim to have an affinity with Liverpool. Well, fuck that. As well as me being naturally contrarian, Liverpool never got anything more than my grudging respect. My team and I had found each other the first time I clapped eyes on Chippy, so the only fascination I had with the Scouse dynasty was in celebrating their misery when young Master Thomas went charging through the midfield.
In the “missing” years, when Highbury became impossible for me to to get to, as much for capacity reasons as my inability to be there, I didn’t consider myself less of a supporter. I still illogically roared myself hoarse in front of tv screens wherever I happened to find them. In pubs, in flats, in houses of friend or foe, if the Arsenal were on, I’d be watching. These were great years, magnificent moments of triumph and celebration (laced as well with a liberal dose of disappointment on several occasions, such is the Arsenal way). But for me, all at a distance.
Access to Arsenal has obviously improved in lots of ways as the world has become smaller. There is no shortage of delivery mechanisms for the “broken” cannon image to be thrust in our faces, predominantly since the move to the Grove. The shuffle across the road though has also made the team more accessible for me and other infrequent visitors, with an increased capacity and a better-than-ever chance to secure tickets. Luckily, I can afford it. On the other hand, some (many?) locals have been dis-enfranchised through the pricing of those tickets. But that would have been just as true, maybe even more so, had we stayed at Highbury.
With the modern Arsenal there is a pathological need in some to polarise all things into mutually-exclusive camps. Thus it shows up in the “definition of a fan”, debate. I found myself considering this quite recently, when Cent posted in the drinks about a potentially dangerous journey to get to the Viewing Centre where he could watch his team. I thought about it when I broke bread in the Tollington with NorCal, making an expensive and lengthy pilgrimage from the West Coast of the States. It was on my mind again when I was in the packed-to-the-rafters, Arsenal-mad, Blind Pig boozer in New York and when I thought of a certain wild-eyed Israeli kicking every ball in absentia down on his American university campus. And I think about it every time I am lucky enough to get in a round with Lars, or any of the Band of Brothers who come from miles beyond Finsbury Park to celebrate the thing we love.
I have nothing but profound admiration for the Arsenal fans who have the wherewithal to get to every minute of every game, particularly the travelling support who continually do themselves, us and the team proud. I wish I had more opportunities to join them. And for some that is the one and only true definition of a fan. I get that. For the rest of us, though, well, we all have our limits in terms of commitment – and we all have to manage whatever constraints impact on that commitment. It might be geography. It might be fiscal. But, when I think of “supporter(s)”, I don’t think – how big? I definitely get antsy when I’m in the midst of the “Uber-Fan” and his ilk in the crazy backwaters of the internet.
Now that the world has been technologically shrunk to the size of your average living-room, supporting Arsenal, like football itself, has changed forever, and for some, it’s for the worse. At its most extreme, since the move, there are some who say they will never go back, which is a great shame. It’s hard to dispute that something died in all of us when the curtain was finally drawn at Highbury. The club though has to move on – it can only survive and prosper in the world it finds itself in, and like it or not it, needs every fan, however simple or complex we care to make the definition.
Thanks for that z. I have no doubt that will spark a lively debate in the drinks that follow.
It hasn’t been all navel-gazing this week. A big thank you is due for the surprise belated birthday gift of a Savile Rogue cashmere scarf. Those who know me closest know I have a cupboard full of scarves (and shoes too, but that’s another story!). This is a fabulous addition and will definitely make a debut outing for the Everton cup tie. Thanks again.
260 Responses to “A Man’s A Fan For A’ That – A Guest Post”
Alas, no, Lurky.
I’m just following the game on the flash score.
silly first yella
eff off
silly second arsed?
Can’t be marsed
I’m from Jupiter.
The almost trophy.
Great stuff, z!
Olympiacos one up:D
Great post.I feel sad now.I’m going for a lie down.
thoroughly enjoyable read
and
as a man
who grew up
in a place
where
the only english accents
heard
belonged to people
ironically
dressed in green
pointing guns
i can understand
erm
well
the more surreal nature
of being a football fan
an across the water
football fan
an Arsenal fan
.
i don’t feel
the “need” to
justify
my goonerdom
anymore
.
i’ve earned my ‘spurs’ 😉
and
by all accounts
you’ve more than
earned yours
and
have a set
of
complimentary
eatin’ irons too
.
top read zico
Great post Zico!
Lovely addition to your collection as well!
Goooaaaallll!
…and another one.
heh, the irony, Young shouting on Joel Campbell for diving.
Very interesting post Zico which I enjoyed. I have supported Arsenal from the terraces and latterly the stands for nearly 55 years but I live in the South of England . If I moved further away as I almost did a couple of years ago( I almost bought Bruce Rioch’s old house!) I would have reduced my Arsenal attendance significantly. Not sure how I feel about how worthy different forms of support are. The real test is how much you love the club but I am happy to concede that people who follow us all over the world deserve to be considered more fanatical than me.Certainly our friends from far away who inhabit this site clearly share a great love of the club which comes through in their posts. One might argue that those who could attend easily and don’t , are not fired with the same passion as regular attenders but I stopped going when I had a young family, money and particularly time was tight and I had to prioritise so I wouldn’t criticise non- attenders because I don’t know their circumstances.
What I would say is that I prefer to make my own mind up about a game by watching it rather than receive the ‘ wisdom’ of Messrs Tyldesley, Keane, Redknapp et al . You see the game through their eyes and I like to watch the peripheral bits that TV doesn’t cover. But I’m no worthier a Gooner than anyone else. I just welcome anyone who loves the club.
Olsson then Gnabry.
Off to Barcelona.
United look like a bunch of strangers who’ve just meet and decided to start competing in Sunday League.
How they nicked 4 points against us this season is still beyond me.
Campbell looks lively.. he likes to run at defenders and take ’em on. Would love to see him here next season.
I hope
that didn’t sound
anti – english
furthest from
intentions
.
some of my best friends
have funny accents
😉
.
Don’t rush SSY, Kamara red card.
No worries cba.
Evening all.
Nice work Dr Z. Great writing and agree 100% with the sentiments. I’ve seen arsenal live (in situ) on (approximately) 7 occasions. At highbury as a 10 yr old, via the emirates, Craven Cottage, a bus stop and a New Field.
Live performances just aren’t my thing. Does that make me less
Of a supporter? I think those of you who speak to me regularly know the answer to that one…
JOEL CAMPBELL!
CAMPBELL!!!!!! What a goal!!!
Campbell with a screamer against ManU!
Camppppppppppppppbelllllllllllllllllllll! 🙂
This game’s getting even more enjoyable all the time.
Nice work Dr. Z.
Agent Campbell putting a frown on Van Cuntie’s sour puss in Greece. 🙂
See, Arsenal players can score against United. 😉
That Joel Cambell can certainly hit the ball what a strike!
brilliant shot to be honest, quite looking forward to having him back next year 🙂
What a goal !!!
The name is Campbell, you munky twats!
However, a rather less uplifting fact is that Joel Campbell is the only Arsenal player to have scored against ManU this season…
Those Greeks can make some atmosphere O.o
Cheers ‘hol
i feel sometimes
i put my unintentional
big foot in it
Great post Z by the way.
This discussion about ‘fan credentials’ is pointless, it reminds me of these fatuous arguments that people have on F365 about who deserves the epithet ‘world class’ – like it’s some objectively agreed licence to jerk off to a select group of skillful players.
Well I live in South London, was born in Essex and have been to the Emirates only 4 times, do I not have the right to say I love Arsenal?
arsenal legend;)
and he never
kicked a ball for us
heh chocolate leg:D
That’s three times more than me, Porco, but then I’ve lived in the Antipodes since 1967. That hasn’t stopped me being a fan since I was asked, in 1950, aged 7, what team did I support? Arsenal I said, unhesitatingly, basically because they’d just won the FA Cup. Even through years of only being able to read about their progress I have been the loyalist of fans. Now of course I can watch all Arsenal games, League, Cup and CL, in Full HD on a 50″ plasma, and pause and replay as much as I want to.
Interesting to read your experience, Dr Z, and a pleasure to experience your writing style.
Öskar
A terrific MISS from RvP … love it! 🙂
Öskar
Fantastic one Z, real pleasure to read that!
Paulo Machado has a magnificent ‘tache.
I think I may have to review my opinion of the loan system 🙂
Heh Öskar, it’s so much easier nowadays isn’t it 🙂
I remember a time when checking the results in the Sunday newspaper was the only access to anything related to our team.
Pure gowd, Zico.
@30 Silly Second Yella
Apologies my mistake 🙂
Nice writing and fine sentiments, z.
A pint of black stuff on the bar for you.
Didn’t think this morning I might be smiling tonight.
You have to fancy them to recover at home though…
No mistake ATG, WE can spell ‘im whatever WE like but those fanooks
can’t and they read this.Believe me.
We’ve got 24m for RVP. Once again, good job Arsene.
Great article Dr Z.
Pint of the black stuff on the bar.
Wonderful piece Dr Z. Give me a shout when you’ve downed the two from Baff and tabs and I’ll get you another – I hate to see them lining up.
COYG
A true reflection of fandom today Zico, your style makes reading a pleasure. What..10 mins since your last glass put on the bar. It must be empty already, here’s another pint of black gold to keep the whistle whet.
Fascinating read zico and eloquently expressed. As one who started supporting Arsenal in 1969 because of some mates at my new job, subsequently travelled a great deal to such exotic climes as Carlisle (FA Cup tie) and Brussels (Cup Winners Cup Final), and stopped during the Graham era (boredom and price), I have often ruminated on the difference between supporter (I once was) and fan (I still am). Never been to the Emirates and probably won’t, unless they bring back the terraces (football should be watched standing up). I’ve also wondered if it wasn’t so much the football that I enjoyed as the conviviality.
Whatever – I now rarely miss a game thanks to the joys of streaming and the conviviality I can to some extent experience in this bar.
Off for some sun, hopefully, on Gran Canaria on Thursday, so will only miss Stoke – I can live with that. (Timing purely accidental.)
Top top stuff zico, but everybody knows that real Arsenal fans come from Holloway…….. Finsbury Park!? MEH, too close to Tottenham for my liking, a large part of it is in Haringey don’tcha know 😉
Growing up a stones throw (literaly when Leeds were in town) away from our previous home and being lucky enough to have neighbours who were willing to bring young street urchins like my brother and yours truly to games from a pretty early age, I spent a great deal of the weekends of my youth, Saturday 3 o clock kick offs, watching the Arsenal. It didn’t matter that we weren’t the best, I can’t really remember us really challenging, although there was the three Wembley visits. Heartbreak losing to Ipswich was replaced a year later with euphoria as we did the mancs in the last minute.
The following year was the marathon slog that saw us play a shed load of games (for that era) and end up potless, it also saw the departure of my childhood hero, ol Chippy Brady. That was hard to take, but i was back the next year non the less. It was though, the dawn of a period of mediocrity, I remember one game that was particularly awfull, it was 1983 and it was against Nottingham Forest,I think it was actually the birth of the “boring boring Arsenal” fame, it was absolutly dire, it was todays equivelent of watching stoke against, eeeer, well, Stoke, tedious, tedious, terrible. The attendances at, most, home games were far from capacity, but that mattered not a jot, because I was there week in and week out regardless.
At the time, I’d be lying if I said that i didn’t exhibit a touch (read large dollop) of fan snobery On the schoolyard, the weekends action would not be disscussed with mere “armchair supporters” and no attention at all would be paid to the plastics de jour, which as zico has attested to were of the Mickey Mouse variety. Maybe it was just the foolishness of youth, but they were different times and I coud never understand, or stomach, the idea that someone who grew up in such close proximity to the Home of Football having an aliegence to a team from a city that they had no connection to and in all liklihood could not even pick out on a map.
Almost straight after, not graduating from, school I left the UK for adventures on foriegn shores. I followed my beloved gunners as best I could usually via Sunday papers which I got on a Monday. I returned to London to see us win the Milk Cup against the Mickeys at wembley and also returned so I could be in the area when we won our first league title in 18 years, there was no way I was missing that. Shortly after the bus parade to Islington Town Hall, I was off again……….
Life, family and career got in the way, opportunities to visit my birth place became extreamly limited, weekend visits virtualy impossible. I followed the team as best I could, it was difficult at first, but with the birth of the PL, sattelite tv, pay per view and internet it has become increasingly easier, in fact there is a hell of a lot more coverage and disscusion now then there ever was when I was going regularly.
Football has changed so much since then, the whole experience is almost unrecognisable from way back when. Global coverage has changed the whole landscape, Arsenal are followed and loved from far flung corners of the world. Who the hell am I, or anybody else to tell these people that they are a lesser fan then others. We all follow in our own way, I wish I could go more, but I can’t, although Arsenal is still a large part of my life.
are
ye all stout
drinkers
hear only talk
of
guinness
plays havoc
with
your bowels
believe me
i feel like
hanging
mine out
and
pray
for
intervention
when
the mud slide occurs
skeleton bob indeed
anyhoo
have sugarhill gang
walloping out me ns10s
And a splendid contribution from our resident lowlander. A drink of your choice when Zice claims his Guinness from me.
I think I’m a little older than h2h, grew up a little further away and, sadly, have never passed through a period of frequent attendance. I think there were a few seasons in the early 80s when I might have managed three or four trips to Highbury in a season, but over my lifetime, I doubt that I’ve been to more than around a couple of dozen Arsenal games. I’m not convinced that I’m any less a fan because of that.
One point, though. I have always understood that “Boring, boring Arsenal” was a much older accusation, possibly dating to per-war days when the idea of counter-attacking was much less familiar and Arsenal’s habit and ability to soak up pressure and hit back on the break was not appreciated.
I think my brother’s father-in-law (my uncle-in-law??) went to the pre-war game against Villa that we won something like 7-1. I recall him saying that we’d only had the ball in the Villa half 8 times and the eighth either led to a narrow miss or a good save. No shortage of top, top strikers then, evidently.
Right, that’s my lot.
Night all.
COYG
Well done, Zico.
BMBD
is wind the only
youngster here ?
sometimes
it’s like a pirate ship
the level of the
bones a creakin
.
ahem
.
harumphhh
.
me hearties
.
*does star jumps*
H2H, that was beautiful. Thank you.
oskar 37
i think
we’re all singing
from
the same hymn sheet
but
please
stop flaunting yer wares
i have a wee portable telly
14 inch
thicker than its wide
😉
we’ve signed
a few of those
🙂
flex still plugged in
yup
that too
.
recently
i’ve listened
to the games
on the radio
.
effinanjeffinallovertheshop
you wanna hear
a tune though
can blow the side of
the house off
currently
the temptations
.
just before
johnny moped
Great write up zico, and great drinks by the regulars.
I’m not as young as Wind but not as old as Clive, somewhere in the middle, so I still have many years to improve my current low live view count.
Hopefully the next time I’m there I can get a drink at the juicer of choice with all you lovely chaps and chappettes before viewing as well 🙂
Is Campbell going to come back to us? I heard he’s thinking of staying at Olympiakos…
CBA.
Leg.
End.
Zico,
lovely read my friend,top stuff.
H2H,great post too.
Right now i am busy trying to get hold of the many Utd fans that i know,but guess what.?? their mobiles all seem to be switched off.!!
62 catalan
take it back
being watched
🙂
Excellent piece, Dr Z. I have a feeling it will be featured on the official Arsenal website.
rest yer spanners
this
is
the Arsenal
.
apart from me
you’ll get
the best mishmash
of very considered
opinions
you’re very sensible
to be here
.
top people
top site
top poitin
@63: This is what Man U fans are doing these days Clive…
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-UUBBVvfBUcM/T1t8Zi673mI/AAAAAAAAA0c/uEdZ-PA4IpI/s1600/homer-simpson-bush-gif.gif
Excellent, zico.
I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Gooners from many different countries at The Tollie now. It’s great to see the sense of pleasure and pride they feel at just being at a(nother) game.
The knowledge of all things Arsenal – current and historical – of the American fans I’ve met is amazing, especially considering it has grown in a country where it’s own sports have always been so dominant.
The only fans that annoy me are the ones I referred to as ‘tourists’ in a comment to Bath the other day.
That label had nothing to do with how far, or how often, they travel to get to games, but was a reference to their characteristic of turning up late and leaving early, at half anf full times, and crucial points of a match, and blocking our views while they do it.
Not to mention leaving the stadium looking half full for the final ten minutes.
Like many others, I had spells when it was not possible for me to get to games as often as I would have liked, but I never cared any the less for that.
My biggest period of enforced absence was during the early Wenger years – that’s right, the years when we won everything – but I watched from afar with tearful pride at the even more wonderful, class club that my Arsenal had become.
I had been there through all of the barren years, just as I have ever since opening day of The Emirates. Did you know we haven’t won anything since then ? 😉
Probably a lot of people will wish I would become a distant follower again, so we could actually collect some more trophies. 😉
Other interesting bits from Catalan, ttg, H2H, dkg, Pangloss, Oskar –
the various locations of that little lot say it all really.
Sorry, cba
To omit you from my list.
You’re always interesting. 😉
a gooners
a gooner
doesn’t take
a genius
to
spot one
although
sometimes
i
have me doubts
bout
the beasts
.
how secure
is a bull’s allegiance
to
anything
nonmunchy
or
nonfucky
trev
discount me
most
of
it
pointless
that
which i can
recall
bout
similar
.
Time for
slim gaillard
.
oh yes
arsenaloreenie!
mac voutie
not
flaunting
cba
just contrasting
then and
not then.
t’was a time when
carrier pigeons
brought
the news.
now ether waves
do it quicker
and pigeons
gather
in trafalgar
square
to complain
of jobs lost
to technology.
cooo cooo cooo.
bring back
hanging!
Slim Gaillard, cba? Chicken Rhythm, but not on the Beeb, aye.
I first found Slim in Kerouac’s On The Road. Went out almost immediately and bought an EP with Chicken Rhythm, How The Moon, One Minute Of Flamenco For Three Minutes and My Blue Heaven. I still have it.
Absolute classic.
Öskar
*adjusts horizontal hold on portable*
any gooner
who’s also
a slim gaillard fan
vout!
Hi-seigh, cba, and a large holly on the bar for ya! 😉
Öskar
I’m not going to go into modern poetry about it (or is that “postmodern”?), but I have a running online debate over which of us is more of a fan: Myself, who, due to distance and access, didn’t become a part of this team, and let it become a part of him, until 2008, and believes in it, and its manager, no matter how many times it lets him down; or the other guy, born and aged (I won’t say “grew up” or “raised,” since he’s very childish) in Islington, stood (and probably relieved himself) on the North Bank at Highbury, and drinks at the Twelve Pins, and knows Bully and knew the Bear, but won’t go to the Emirates, because he hates the board, really hates the manager (he says it has nothing to do with Wenger being non-British), goes to Leyton Orient because it’s cheap, and would rather have 1993 when Graham got us 10th, behind Tottenham, but got both domestic cups, than have 2013, when we finished ahead of Tottenham and qualified for the Champions League.
He’s like the guy in the chip shop early in “Fever Pitch” who said they were f***ing rubbish last year, and they’ll be that this year, and the next year, and the year after… even though “the year after” turned out to be 1971, the first Double season.
By the way, I looked it up: “The last home game of last season,” which would have been 1967-68? Arsenal won it 2-1 over West Brom, who’d just won the FA Cup. That doesn’t sound like “f***ing rubbish” to me.
Like that old man in the chip shop, some people are never happy unless they’re unhappy. They’d rather lose, because, when you win, there’s no one to blame.
Here’s paying my round, if you’re willing to convert it to quid: $$. Ah, the Magner’s is cold.
Lovely piece.
As someone who has never been to Emirates (or Highbury) despite traveling through London so many times (a few years back had even spent a Saturday afternoon at Heathrow while we were playing away at Fulham) for one reason or another, but who has followed Arsenal feverishly and passionately for more than a decade primarily from US but also France, Germany and India, and who has met a surprising number of Gooners at different places in the world, and has introduced quite a few young football fans in the family to joy and beauty of watching Arsenal play and talk about Arsenal’s game, not for a moment I have felt to be any less of a fan or less of a supporter than those fortunate souls jauntily cheering the team from a few meters away.
I have never seen Coltrane or Monk or Sonny Stitt or Miles or Bird play live as well, but that doesn’t make me any less of a fan compared to those who used to hang around the Village Vanguard in the Fifties.
Whether separated by distance in time or distance in space, a certain kind of love is its own reward. And I love to watch Arsenal play in that certain way.
Nice stuff Zico. Someone might need to help me recall if I’ve met you at the Tollie on my last trip. Too many names to remember, mostly because of the booze and the general state of elation whenever I’m in London to watch The Arsenal, win, lose or draw.
Been a Gooner from afar for a while and only have had the resources the past 4 years to travel and afford tickets to the Emirates. Don’t really get the necessity of the point that some “snobs” have raised.
The Arsenal fans I’ve met locally or on my travels have been warm, funny, supremely knowledgeable and have always shared great anecdotes and alcohol with me. Alas, the one great story I always will have is that magical night when we played Shahktar Donetsk and the whole stadium stood up as one to welcome back Dudu.
I still hold firm to my belief that I would not get this affection and class (in general) from fans with any other club.
It was through this very blog and our dear author that I’ve had the privilege to partake in some pre and post match jollies at the Tollie and I hope I will soon travel again.
I seem to have lost my train of thought. Anyway, may this percentage of welcoming and generous Gooners always outweigh the “snobs”.
Well done zico!
I am a relatively new fan of the Arsenal having heard my calling in 2001 while visiting a friend who had recently moved to the Islington area from Seattle. We happened upon a pub on match day, wandered into a crowd of pub dwellers dressed in red, and that was that.
I have never been to Highbury or the Emirates (I hope to change that maybe next year, at least the Emirates part as my time machine is still on the blink) but I rarely miss a match at the local pub owned by an expat from London who bleeds Arsenal red.
Some of my friends wonder about my addiction to Arsenal especially in light of the local MLS Seattle Sounders. I have season tickets to the Sounders and go to most of the matches, but if there is a chance it will interfere with going to the George and Dragon for an Arsenal match I give my tickets to a friend. Arsenal are much closer to my heart.
What if I had wandered into a pub in west London on that day in 2001? Would I have become, god forbid, a Chelsea fan?
It is a now a moot point, because I am and will always be an Arsenal fan.
COYG!
Lovely stuff, Z. A reminder of what a joy it is to be a Gooner. May we never take it for granted.
Did anyone see RvP’s comment in the wake of the Olympiakos game?
“My teammates are in some of the areas where I want to play. This makes it difficult for me. Then I have to change my tactics to suit my teammates, and play outside my zone. That’s a pity. I won’t point fingers, because I’m not like that.”
Oh no, he’s not like that.
Nah, ecg, not a chance you’d ever have associated yourself with them lot.
Don’t really get the “true fan” debate…I’ve never been interested in micturating contests. I know how big my dick is, no need to compare it to anybody else’s.
BMBD
@85 so BMBD would stand for Big Man Big Dick in that post? 😀
They say everything is bigger in the Lonestar state. 🙂
Touchè, ecg 😀
Outstanding piece Zico. Never been to a match. Not even six year olds running around in the park. I love the Arsenal and am holding out for that. I’ve been invited to many MLS matches but I’m sticking to my guns. The closest I’ve come to a match was I visited the Arena in Amsterdam on a non match day and bought a Ajax scarf in 2002. I’ve been to London 3 times but the last in 2003, before Arsenal for me. But I watch every match even if I already know the score or have to watch in Spanish. I don’t even follow any other sports anymore. Haven’t watched a Super Bowl in six years, unheard of for an American male. Just Arsenal for me. All signs are pointing to next season around this time I can finally make it to the Emirates. COYG
Have you guys seen this yet?
http://player.arsenal.com/player/4777-unclassic-commentary
Cheers Zico!
@53 H2H
From 1981 onwards it was pretty dire until GG took over, although we had brief moments under Don Howe and younger players, e.g. TA, Rocky, etc., were starting to emerge. Game I remember was Stoke at Home in 81, which although we won was fucking turgid stuff. Became infamous afterwards because of this;
” During the 1980–81 season Stoke played out an awful 2–0 defeat away at Arsenal and a journalist told Durban that there was no entertainment watching his team’s performance, to which Durban replied “If you want entertainment go and watch a bunch of clowns””
…which pretty well summed up Arsenal during the latter days of Terry Neil as well. I remember throwing my scarf away on The North Bank the night we lost at home to Walsall in the League Cup. Never worn one since.
I started going in 1978, when I moved to London as a student. Started following the club in 1969. My only reason for following Arsenal was my dear old Mum. She was no fanatic and came from Cambridgeshire. She started following them in the 1930’s so was probably the then equivalent of a nowadays United following Glory Hunter! Don’t care. Once she’d shown me her collection of old Cigarette Cards and other mementos carefully preserved over the years, that was me sorted. God bless you Mum, RIP.
Perhaps because of my own background, I’ve never been fazed by why people follow Arsenal, where they come from or how often they attend. Its a personal thing and always should be. People tell me they support Arsenal, I’ll have a listen to what they say, on that basis. Then if I think they’re a cunt, I’ll call them one regardless.
Thank Bergkamp that you didn’t regard me as one then, Esso (or so you had me believe). 😉
Fuck off Steve-o, you’s a boy! First time I met you you’d just been down The George!
Haha. Yes, Esso, great memory! I remember the look on your face then, visibly impressed.
I think.
What a great read Z.
A voice for the long-distance fan-base.
I was particularly impressed with the reference to Cent.
Balague is claiming that Morata has agreed to join us subject to agreeing a fee with Real. Which basically means that any transfer is a loooonnnngggg way from completion with our negotiating prowess.
…Starts a typical Arsenal passing move…
One touch give and go…………..
tries to shoot but stumbles…
leaving it there for the taking
… on a plate …
Whoops – that’s a whatchacallit
Thx Datsyuk w.s.
Ooooh so typical Arsenal!
So many assists but no one to shoot that thing 😉
You’re welcome dk
Not exactly a rapid flowing move worthy of the Arsenal (Cent started it over a hour ago. 😉 ), but they all count.
Well in dk.
Went in off me knee, H2H 🙂
Re: Esso @92. Someone please buy that man a scarf. 🙂
Thanks for the kind ones above gents.
Nice one Trev and great to read how our foriegn legion feel about our team (as if we didn’t already know. 🙂 )
Top man Esso, my first full season would of been the same one you started watching, the few years before that would have been sporadic visits due to my tender years.
The early eighties were indeed pants, but we were still there. Can you imagine what would have happened if the internet was available then? The whole web would have went into meltdown. Having to endure that dross made the victories even sweeter, I almost lost it when Charlie knocked in his second at Wembley and after the game we stayed on the terrraces for ages, hailing “Georgie Graham’s red and white army”.
Now that I’m a lot older and (just a tad) wiser, I can say that sticking with my team through the lean years built charachter and made me grateful for the success when it came. In my humble opinion that should be what defines a fan, not where you’re from or where you’re at, but having the fortitude to stick with your team not only in the good times, but also through the bad. By all means have a bit of a moan, criticise when the time calls for it and never be afraid to question the decisions of those that lead. But when the match is on and the chips are down, then support, because in the end that’s what fans are supposed to do.
Just to prove a point, and because it’s pretty funny, here’s a couple of reactions to a game played in the CL last night (source BBC);
From Ollie, via text: I have been a united fan 36 years, and this is the worst I have seen. Sad to say, I wanted them to lose, just so Moyes might be sacked. If players have confidence and faith in a manager then they will play to the best of their ability, they have neither. Sad times.
Francesco from London, via text: To be honest Moyes’ appointment was the worst in united history. I’m a United fan and can’t bother to watch any game this season I have lost faith in this guy
Ha Ha, “I wanted them to lose” and “can’t bother to watch”. Yeah, these guys are real fans. ;P
Well in, dk!
H2H @105, let’s just say that the opposition parked the bus so we were busy making off the ball runs for the better part of the build-up to the goal.
Did they leave it parked during the half time break too? 😉
Great post and something that is always thrown at me when i say i support Arsenal.
I have been supporting Arsenal from 1996, i was 14 then and till date there has been no second team, no admiration for some other, nothing apart from my dear Arsenal.
I have always been told by a lot who say you cant call yourself a real fan if you arent from UK, or if you havent visited the home of football etc. I am always told you dont understand how it truly feels.
I am from India, i love my land but why should where am i from influence my fanatism for my Arsenal. My life revolves around Arsenal and anyone who knows me will say the same. My girl friend for 7 years said choose between me or Arsenal and i said lets be friends from now because if you dont understand what Arsenal mean to me then you dont understand me.
I have saved my whole life to go to Arsenal, everyone says i want to go here there, i always say i want to go to Arsenal thats all nowhere else.
Even i would love to be able to watch every game live with the team, dream is to be a part of the away supporters and cheer for my Arsenal but then for the last 18 years i havent missed a game of the Gunners, i have gone and watched games here in Bangalore as a part of minority supporting the Arsenal against say a united/chelsea or pool and i do so proudly.
For me i dont care if i am not born in the UK or near Islington, for me my Arsenal is as much mine as anyone else’s. I care for them so much that at times i wonder if there is anything else i care more for.
To conclude yes i would love to be a season ticket holder, yes i want to be with the team all the time but yes even from here i wish and pray for my team’s success and i am as much a fan as anyone else can be to the greatest team on earth.
Truly humbling stuff, Vinay@111. It puts my “only seen the Arenal a couple of dozen times” into some kind of perspective. Good luck with your savings plan.
COYG
Too many great posts to mention by name. Just such a shame that so many of you can’t be in the stadium regularly instead of those who turn up late and leave early every week.
H2H,
United “fans” who can no longer be bothered to watch, or hope their team will lose, after so many years of success, simply endorse what we have known for such a long time: glory hunters.
Personally, I just don’t get “not bothering” to watch, or ” hoping to lose”.
The problem for United is that they let their retiring grumpy old Scottish git choose his own successor.
He simply went and chose another grumpy old Scottish git to carry on in his own image.
Now while there are a hell of a lot of grumpy old Scottish gits out there to choose from, they don’t all possess the fear factor, or the hold over United that old Purplenose did.
United was one case of a club needing a big name, charismatic manager with a proven track record, who could demand 100% from the players in the wake of their most successful manager ever.
Fortunately they didn’t get one.
Outstanding Vinay!
I feel the same in a lot you say. Not being born into it like H2H or Steve T’s kids doesn’t mean that you can’t be a true fan.
I admit that fans like me (maybe you too) will probably never feel the same way when it comes to all the rivalry with other teams as our neighbours or the likes. But I don’t think that is such a bad thing!
Though I will admit that we deserved to loose when I feel so I will never hope for a loss!
Big difference isn’t it?
*registers surprise at the lack of grumpy old Scottish gits in the bar*
SAF was never going to let a big boy come on and sour his legacy. Borinihio was always going to be the best candidate. Don’t believe for a second his dribble about “being where he wanted to be” at Chelski, he wanted the United job, but they (SAF) didn’t want a classless chav.
Moyes was the safe bet, enough PL experience, did ok on a budget, not an over inflated ego nor someone prone to rocking the boat. Fergy’s reputation as a master grows stronger per day that he is in charge. Poor old Davy is out of his depth and drowning…
Long may it continue. 😆
@114
I think the rivalries will come with time, my friend.
Sp*ds – As the years go by, with more material I read about them, history or current and also with (great) influence from the older Gooners, I resent them and hate them more and more each passing moment. It will happen. It WILL happen.
Manure – I couldn’t help it, it came naturally when the great rivalry between our best team in the 2000’s had to go toe to toe with that lot every season with the title race being 2 horsed. Who could forget the classic battles between PV4 and Roy Keane? How about the match where Van Horseface missed the penalty and Keown gave him a judo chop? And the most recent RvC incident? Easy case.
Chavski – Dennis Wise? Cashley Cole? Didier Drogba? Moaningho? What’s not to hate?
I could go on and on but you get the idea.
I have had my moods dictated by the Arsenal since 1970. I was born and bred in Hackney and have lived in the States since 1988 but the passion has never left. That famous night at Anfield i was huddled around a crappy short wave radio listening to static for the most part on the BBC World Service getting updates on the game. No interweb then. The joy I felt then was no less than anyone else who was around to witness it.
I was born into success 1971 but earned my scars early. 1972 Leeds and my first away game outside of London was a trip to Hillsborough for the Sunderland 1973 semi final debacle. I suffered the mid 70’s with the relegation battles,was lifted up with Brady years and the brief resurgence and the 79 win. The crazy 1980 season. The Don Howe dross and finally George Graham and the League Cup win over the Scousers,wheres your record now Rushie boy !
I spend my game days at the Big Ben Pub in Charlotte, North Carolina. The Queen City Gooners we go by.We are loud and proud and we have fans from all over the globe in that pub who have never seen us raise any silverware up but they hurt with every loss and cheer every win just as much as if they were born on Avenell Road.
Come on you Gunners
Steve-o
I think I’m pretty much there already 🙂
A loss to Chavski or Spuds feels not the same like one to the Toffees. (God forbid what I’m writing here)
In the beginning there was only win, draw or lose that influenced how I felt the next day. Nowadays the question of who and how we played influences my feelings a big part!
some
really crackin’ reads
just brilliant
gooners ya see
top sorts
cheers to ‘holic
for
shepherding
a flock of gooduns
(bad hairsprayed 80s shite band almost)
*enters bar*
Trev @116
– Awa’ an’ bile yer ginger heid, ya wee nyaff.
*leaves bar*
Google translate is stumped. 🙂
122
neely boked wi laffin
🙂
priceless
In terms of rivalry, have always said united it is for me, spuds, sorry from the time i have supported Arsenal they have never been up to our mark ever, for me they always remain in our shadows, United is sheer hatred for more reasons than one, the little kid crying today though is a welcome sight, anyone sense that he is doing it for a better pay package ala shrek!!!!!
One last point, we here in Bangalore started with a bunch of Arsenal fans watching games together 10 years back but now have members in thousands and have been officially recognized by Arsenal as being a supporters club, we are called Arsenal Bangalore Supporters Club, for me the day we got recognized was the greatest day of my life so far along with the birth of my 2 nieces. To think i started this group makes me feel so proud, see we are a classy club with loyal fans worldwide.
the part of the world
whence i came
has millions upon millions
to promote
ulster-scots
as a language
it’s basically
talkin in old fashioned slang
in
a ballymena accent
similar to
what we just did
.
where’s my funding ?
.
*greets*
Vinay
That is exactly what I meant! Most fans that grew up in the neighborhood will tell you that the derbys are the biggest games in a season and that they hate spuds the most.
Allow me to compare it to something totally different: Even if I was a catholic or a protestant, not being Irish means to me I will never truely understand what they were and sometimes still are arguing about.
I will leave it with that now before it gets too political.
That i concur Datsyuk, i probably wont realize the kind of animosity Gooners will have towards the spuds but i can relate the feeling to what i have for united.
Cheers Dr Z. Excellent post
I see another Indian ‘holic in the bar!
A pint of the black stuff for Vinay please barman
Freud described these intense local rivalries as the narcissism of small differences. He’s right. They are the most intense sporting rivalries and internecine strife is the most brutal. It’s the human equivalent of animal turf wars.
who is that fella?
..or whatever he chooses for that matter!
Grumpy Auld Scottish Git,
Do what ?
Hey Baff, how’s it going?
This had me chuckling
http://player.arsenal.com/player/4776-unclassic-commentary
128
a popular misconception
s’not
a religious divide
to do with
bigger things
as an indication
there’s an area
in dublin
called
irishtown
but
thats a story for another day
.
ooops gone an dunnit again
Bath @132, the possibilities are almost endless ….. ? 😉
Vinay
We are playing pretty much the same tune I guess 🙂
Be my guest and have a drink with me.
Harsha @135 – Fine thanks, yourself?
Trev @ 138 – they are indeed.
Trev @134 & H2H@123 He is suggesting that young Trev should go and stick his head in a basin of boiling water and put a towel over it – a traditional Scottish remedy for brain congestion.
cba @124 heh
i should say though
nice baiting
128
i bit bat bought it
clearly
the Arsenal
is a big and serious
part of all our lives
but
some things
which have no place here
are really big and serious
.
so
apologies ‘hol an all
for
bringin stuff
that didn’t need brought
to
what
is a haven of measured
insanity for me
.
what have you done zico
we’re all gushing our lives
.
you jeremy kyle you!
😉
Big hehs @ cba.
Good stuff steve o, Datsyuk and Vinay.
Back when I was going to Highbury, the day the fixtures came out the first two matches you looked for were the NLD’s, easily the most important fixtures of the season for us locals. Friends, collegues, classmates, even families had split loyalties when it came to derby day, plus back then there wasn’t really too much to choose between the sides, they had their doubles in the sixties, we had ours in the 70’s, we had our FA Cup in ’79, they had theirs in ’81, our stadiums were pretty much the same capacity, although theirs was a shitheap, still is. 😉
It was only later that they faded totally into the shadows and the main rivals became the Mancs and later still the emergance of the Chavs pushed down the totts in the league rivalry stakes, but forever they will be our local rivals and for such have earned our eternal distain.
Cheers Bath, sir. 🙂
Thanks all. Some awesome contributions above. Big lift given.
Cheers.
(This is not an invitation to raise a glass, it being midweek. 67 dry hours and counting 😉 )
Dear Holics,
I am deeply humbled by the responses to my guest post above, which to be honest with so many themes desperate for attention, I struggled to condense into the still far-too-long spraff that emerged.
I was convinced therefore that the drinks would simply evaporate into a wasteland of tumbleweed, and the post would die of loneliness. In typical fashion though, the quality of the drinkers here went one better and responded with some fantastic posts of their own.
At the risk of alienating others, I do feel that I have to doff my cap in particular to H2H and Esso for their drinks at # 53 and # 91 respectively, and to cba for continually keeping me in “laugh out loud” territory.
But to all of you, thanks for reading/commenting/sharing and thanks to Holic for indulging.
Yours,
another grumpy old Scottish Git
PS Steve-O, yes we DID meet – still waiting on that Guinness 😉
*enters bar*
Zico,
Aye, ye’ve alienated ithers, ya bampot. Haud yer wheesht an’ stick yer bunnet up yer airse.
*leaves bar*
Grumpy Auld Scottish Git,
“Ya wee nyaff” turns out to be a person of dubious intelligence, an idiot, a numpty …. each definition getting steadily worse.
Charming, I’m sure, but thanks for proving my point. 😉
houl yer wheeest
!
say it every day
me
wish i listened to me
though
the
shite i spout
.
top post
clearly
a top man
among
many here
‘ceptin for trev
naahinn bit a hoor!
🙂
*re- enters bar*
Och it’s nae that bad, Trev…..it was playfully intended. Nae fear factor required. Muckle better than a fair few o thae Anglo-Saxon epithets bandied aroon this baur. Hae a wee cuddle if ye’re feelin’ bruised, laddie. Meanwhile ah’ll hae wan o thae black Irish thingies.
*leans on bar, waiting for a pie, a pint and a kind word*
Cmon trev
can barely
believe
you haven’t
made a comment
.
first sign
of
you being
punacious
and
i’ll hide in the corner
as should others
(said otters but small screen dictates)
149
subtle as
a
turnip
in yer troooos
breeks, laddie, breeks
and
no
i don’t say
neap
An’ ah’m still waitin’ ohn that pint, pie an’ kind word.
ye say neap, Ah say neep….
could be a sang
whats ulster-scots
for
a
fat lip and a thick ear?
Ah dinna ken – thae Ulstermen are richt incomprehensible tae me.
Wha’re ye lookin’ at, pal?
Those 67 dry hours, ‘Holic, are they continuous?
Stop poking
the paddy
in
the cage
he no s(eaka da )ingo
.
ya twaddler
i k ow who ye are
ya cheeky monkey
*chuckles*
:0)
Much more of these northern dialects and we are going to need sub-titles.
Northern? NORTHERN?
FFS
Ye’re supposed tae be Northern tae thae Clockenders.
Ned, knock a few bevvys back and you’ll understand it better. 😉
works fur me, H2H 🙂
What he left unspoken was “Give me my own chant or I’m off to Bayern Munich in the summer.”
http://news.arseblog.com/2014/02/koscielny-i-want-my-own-song/
Ingrate. 😉
corned beef
makes yer pee
smell of corned beef
sorry
aughtermuchtywaheyansuch
pee st’ll
smelt like my sandwich
or
did my sandwich
smell of pee?
.
*asks goats*
Doesn’t Koscielny have “oooooh I wanna dance with Koscielny…” already??
Heh Zico, yes! The Guinness incident! Guess who took the pint mistakenly 😀
He certainly had a song on Saturday. Can’t remember how it went though. It wasn’t that one though.
Ah sorry, cba,
temporarily indisposed here.
See, with all this Scottishness going on, I was drawn to a ‘cultural’ magazine that my pal Zico loaned me from his, er, collection.
In fact, it was the September 2013 issue of Upkilt magazine, a shocking publication if ever I saw one. I tell you, there were some “richt boggin bawbags” on display in there – and that was in the Readers Wives section !
I’m beginning to understand why they’re all so bloody grumpy the whole time ! 😉
Steady Trev. Why so grumpy? Are you planing on applying to join Salmond’s Albania Mark II?
Chavs survived a bit of an onslaught there.
It’s all playful here too, Grumpy.
I simply called a couple of grumpy old Scottish git football managers, grumpy old Scottish gits and some other grumpy old Scottish git called me a numpty and told me to go boil my ginger head.
I did realise the whole time though, that that is a term of endearment in Scotland. 😉
Ah. I see there’s been quite a bit of grumpiness around. Have a Guinness all round.
H2H@162: 🙂
Scottish terms of endearment have been known to start wars elsewhere. 🙂
feckin shower
🙂
cba – top of the evening to you, young fella
Nae wunner ah’m grumpy. Hiv ye saw tha’ new Scoatland simmet?
Whit eejit designed tha’ monstroasity?
bt8b@164: How about this, sung to the tune of the Incredible String Band’s October Song:
I’ll sing you this Koscielny song.
Oh, there is no song before it.
‘Cos nothing rhymes with his name
So we can not f***ing chant it.
How about, to the tune of Nellie the Elephant?
Koscielny the centreback
wins the ball
and takes it away from the striker
Off he goes with the ball at his feet
Kos, Kos, Kos.
Cheeky I know, but happy to go with guest posts from all regulars right now, if you have got views, favourite players, favourite matches etc. to get off your chests.
To the tune The Beatles’, She Loves You –
Koscielny
Yeah yeah yeah
Koscielny
Yeah yeah yeah
Koscielny
Yeah yeah yeah yeah …..
Might even remember the words.
Class, baff@179. I like it. A lot.
COYG
Oops. Sorry, Trev. Our posts crossed. Your is a fine song, with the enormous benefit of having simpler words. Baff’s is wittier, so I prefer it.
I anticipate the “She Loves You” version echoing around the grounds for many years to come.
Version 2
Laurent Koscielny
wins the ball
and takes it away from the striker
Off he goes with the ball at his feet
Kos-ciel-neeeee.
Or, a song for Sanogo, to the tune of The Laughing Policeman –
Ooh, Ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya
Ooh, ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya
Ooh, ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya
Ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya …
Even easier words !
Trev @181 the winner of the Koscielny song contest, first round. Snappy, upbeat and easy remember. It covers all three major criteria. But it can do with an extra line, referring to his haircut:
With a ‘do like that
You know you should be glad.
easy remember – easy to remember OR easily remembered. Your choice. 🙂
Bath, Trev: superior Kos songs.
Sorry, bath, couldn’t resist your idea of Nellie the Elephant –
Laurent Koscielny
Wins the ball
And boots it straight at van Persie
Once in the guts
Twice in the nuts
Thump! Thump! Thump!
😉
Top-notch, Trev.
You do realise Trev that you have now composed 66% of the Kos anthems in the goonerverse..!
Hope all is well. Did you get a timeline for the knee op..?
Not yet, Joe. Getting a bit desperate to be honest.
Going to offer myself for absolutely any cancellation tomorrow – the surgeon did say it needs doing urgently, but the good old NHS ………
Hang in there Trev. I know in one sense the wait and interim pain must be so frustrating but I have a close friend whose life was changed for the better when he decided to eventually have it done. Two days after the Op, he was “recuperating” while watching his wife doing a little gardening through the sitting room window. The weather at the time was actually hot and the ground had dried very hard, so his wife found it difficult to break the upper crust with the shovel. Just when I called round to see him I found him with a crutch in one hand, a shovel in the other and he was jumping up and down on one leg trying to break the ground for her. I guess thats what you call love ! And hearing how you managed to scuttle to the emirates on one leg was a different kind of love I guess. “The heart is an organ of fire”!
Jock & Jimmy were walking along a street in London.
Jock looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye.
The sign read, “Suits £5.00 each, Shirts £2.00 each, trousers £2.50 per pair”.
Jock said to his pal, “Look at the prices! We could buy a whole lot of these and when we get back to Scotland we could make a fortune.
Now when we go in you stay quiet, okay? Let me do all the talking cause if they hear our accents, they might think we are tight Scotsmen and try to screw us. I’ll put on my best London accent”.
“OK Jock, I’ll keep my mouth shut”, said Jimmy.
They went in and Jock said in a posh voice, “Hello my good man. I’ll take 50 suits at £5.00 each, 100 shirts at £2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at £2.50 each. I’ll back up me truck ready to load them on, old chap!”
The owner of the shop said quietly, “You’re from Scotland, aren’t you?”
“Well yes,” said a surprised Jock. “What gave it away?”
The owner replied, “This is a dry-cleaners…….. !”
Cheers, Joe.
Starts the move from the back…laying the ball from defence to the midfield…
Late to the game here but I’d like to belatedly doff my cap to zico for his splendid contribution. It’s not easy to do so as we often don’t see eye to eye and I’m habitually banned from commenting. However, today I feel compelled to submit my humble acknowledgement on a fine piece of work.
Salute,
Roberto
Steve-o: Denilson-like sideways pass…
Half-pass, half-shot toward the near post …
Had to laugh at RvP complaining his teammates were trespassing on his territory in yesterday’s game. More likely they didn’t even know he was playing, cos the teammate who provided him with the most passes was … keeper de Gea!
Looks like he’ll have to move if he wants to win trophies… 😉
Öskar
Was that an own goal? I wasn’t even looking!
Genius at work.
Öskar
Thanks Ned and 8ball, another brilliant piece of interplay.
Öskar
Although not that slick considering the 41 minutes between 198 and 199! 🙂
Öskar
Talking to myself again… 🙁
Öskar
Oskar. You’ve got to run at the defenders. 😉
And you’re doing a good job so as you were.
Thanks 8ball, I feel better now.
And thanks Trev for #194, loved it! Here’s one back at ya…
Roger is attracted to Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.
One evening when they’re driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: ”Do you realize that, as of tonight, we’ve been seeing each other for exactly six months?”
There is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: “I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he’s been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I’m trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn’t want, or isn’t sure of.”
Roger is thinking: “Gosh. Six months”.
While Elaine continues her thought: “But, hey, I’m not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I’d have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward . . . I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?”
And Roger is thinking: . . . “so that means it was . . . let’s see . …February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer’s, which means . . . lemme check the odometer … Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.”
And Elaine is thinking: “He’s upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I’m reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed – even before I sensed it – that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that’s it. That’s why he’s so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He’s afraid of being rejected.”
And Roger is thinking: “And I’m gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don’t care what those morons say, it’s still not changing gear right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It’s late spring, and this thing is changing like a damn rubbish truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves £600.”
And Elaine is thinking: “He’s angry. And I don’t blame him. I’d be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can’t help the way I feel. I’m just not sure.”
And Roger is thinking: “They’ll probably say it’s only a 90-day warranty. That’s exactly what they’re gonna say, the scumballs.”
And Elaine is thinking: “Maybe I’m just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I’m sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centred, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.”
And Roger is thinking: “Warranty? They want a warranty? I’ll give them a damn warranty. I’ll take their warranty and stick it right up their……”
“Roger,” Elaine says aloud.
“What?” says Roger, startled.
”Please don’t torture yourself like this,” she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. ”Maybe I should never have . . Oh God, I feel so …. .” (She breaks down, sobbing.)
”What?” says Roger.
”I’m such a fool,” Elaine sobs. ”I mean, I know there’s no knight. I really know that. It’s silly. There’s no knight, and there’s no horse.”
”There’s no horse?” says Roger.
”You think I’m a fool, don’t you?” Elaine says.
”No!” says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.
”It’s just that . . . It’s that I . . . I need some time,” Elaine says.
(There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)
”Yes,” he says.
(Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.)
”Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?” she says.
”What way?” says Roger.
”That way about time,” says Elaine.
”Oh,” says Roger. ”Yes.”
(Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)
”Thank you, Roger,” she says.
”Thank you,” says Roger.
Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of chips, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of.
A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it’s better if he doesn’t think about it. (This is also Roger’s policy regarding world hunger.)
The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyse everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.
Meanwhile, Roger, while playing tennis one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine’s, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: ”Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?”
Öskar
Holding possession for 41 minutes with one pass. Pure class, Otd. Youngsters today wouldn’t even know how to begin. Jumpers for goalposts isn’t the half of it. Clive could even probably launch the pass in one game and have it taken down in the next.
absolutely
brilliant
kos songs
just pure genius
and
cheers oskar
for a cracker night time chuckle
They don’t know they’re alive today, Ned. Everything’s instant and all is virtual. God help them when their technologies go down and they have to think for themselves!
Öskar
you’re welc
ome cba.
g’night!
Öskar
180 ‘hol
now
there’s an invitation
for mayhem
next guest post
laughing policeman ya ya song
full lyrics
🙂
to paraphrase kylie
god bless her
and
her wee bouncy buttocks
i can’t get it
outta my f ckin head
HAHAHAHAHA @206 …. As someone who has a significant other that is a good deal younger than me, I understand that a little too well. 😉
oh
and
before i forget
i’m sure you’ll cut
quite the dash
in yer new scarf ‘hol
or
ye might look like
a dog’s dinner
sup to you
i’m guessing
cool as f ck though
*stops brown nosing el guv*
.
ummm
well now
never too early
for
a
sup for me
“chin chin”
A young Scot by the name of Alistair is celebrating his stag night in the local pub. The next day he is due to marry an English woman, Jane, in the local church where his parents were married.
Among the group is his dad, Alex.
Alex turns to his son and says, “now son, I have some advice for you, for tomorrow and for the future. We Scots are a proud nation and must retain our national identity”
Alistair nods, and anticipates some ribbing from the group for marrying, not only a southerner, but a Londoner.
His dad leans in and says, “after the wedding and the party – take your new wife to your hotel room – carry her over the threshold to show how strong you are and how strong Scotland is”
“Aye dad, no need to tell grandma how to suck eggs!” replies Alistair.
“Ach son, I av’nae finished” interrupts his father. He continues:
“throw her onto the bed and tear off your shirt – to show how handsome you are and how handsome Scotland is”
Grandpa Hamish, sat in the corner nursing a whiskey shouts out, “aye, and then start wanking to show how independent Scotland is!”
Don’t understand much at all from all the posts written in Scot, but then again that seems to be the case for the English as well 🙂
And a massive heh@214!
Bath, 🙂
Hamish goes to see Donald at his house and finds him stripping all the wallpaper from the walls.
“Aye, Donald”, he says “obviously you’re decorating then”.
“Och noo, Hamish”, Donald replies, “we’re moving house”.
Kos you are the boss, give rvp a toss for we have the boss, with you and per around there is no loss, kos you are the boss.
Hehs @ various.
Nice try Vinay, not too sure about “give rvp a toss” though. 😯
Nice chants gents, I like the Nelly the Elephant efforts, although for a chant to be effecive it has to be simple and I feel that the lyrics (great as they are) maybe a little too long.
Trev’s got the right idea with his Beatles effort, easily recognisable tune, not too many words.
A few of our latest chants have stuck to that principle, ie Giroud with the Beatles’ – Hey Jude. plus songs for the two deserteurs, taken from KC and the Sunshine Bands – Give it up and The Beach Boy’s – Sloop John B.
Sticking to those guidelines and selecting a song from a past period, I’d go with The Steve Miller Band’s – Abracabra, also using the fact that he asked for a song in the (simplistic) lyrics;
Laurent, Laurent Koscielny
We sing this song for Koscielny
Laurent, Laurent Koscielny
Super Kosielny.
Sorted.
ps, I had that ditty run through my head all night, could hardly bloody sleep, so…… it works. 😉
Great write up Zico
Being a south London boy, ahem ok no longer a boy. I have had to listen to a load of tosh about how can you support Arsenal ?
Being born in 1971 I think I was left with little choice in who i could support even thou I Knew nothing about football at that time.
So the area in which you were hatched has little to do with who you follow, you follow a team which is right for you and Arsenal is right for me !
I became an Arsenal fan in 1976 when my bigger brother was sitting infront of the tele watching the videoprinter on the BBC waiting to see if his beloved Liverpool had won. They didnt and he burst into tears, the next team out was Arsenal who had won so I teased him that my team won and his lost. Thats just how simple the love affair started, mocking my big brother because I couldnt find any fly`s to pull the wings off.
So what dose it matter were or how you came to support the best team in the world, just be glad you did !
Cheers All
Fine eulogy for Tom Finney by Jimmy Armfield.
Great footballer. Top man.
Different era, different values.
And so it begins. RVP is set to consider his future in the summer.
Beautiful.
Not according to Marcel van der Kram, the journalist and “good friend” of RvP who told us how he had been a Gooner from the age of 12, and who said van Persie would not be leaving Arsenal.
That was about two weeks before he left.
trev
why are you not
horizontal
doped to the eyeballs
a
chino wearing
egg chasing
floppy haired
chinless sawbones
hacking away at yer pins
.
consider yerself tutted at , nhs
For your inner active Wolfie: Jimmy Choo sneakers
http://www.theactivetimes.com/10-absurdly-expensive-sneakers?slide=2
A snip at $1,425 a pair.
A song for Kos,maybe difficult for a stadium to sing along with,but a stomping great tune from the early seventies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Dpp8vIgjnI
This is a heartbreaking ongoing football related drama ,very beautifully written
http://www.theguardian.com/football/2014/feb/27/jean-pierre-adams-footballer-coma
I hesitated to link this what with Trev’s op coming up,but thought it was worth a read anyway.
there’s
noddy holder
stuck in me head
now
jeezlouise
just saw
the other link
what the balls are ye at?
strange
Zico,
Thanks for the shout. I can die a happy man, I made it into the text of this fine blog.
The pleasure was all mine.
A great number of great drinks above. I have been extremely busy as of late but The Arsenal is always in my plans. I never miss watching a game, although not always live.
This season so far has been an all time high for me. Not always because of the results, but because I have had the pleasure of interacting with so many Arsenal supporters either in person, here in the bar or in other corners of the interweb.
I am honored to call you all Arsenal supporters, but more importantly friends.
Cheers
Heh, out of curiousity turned on match between Sakhtar and Viktoria Plzen (czech team), Plzen leading 2-0 already, leading 3-1 on aggregate so far, I would love them to play Sp*rs and knock em out:D
..and a guy and friend I used to play footy with scored heh 😀
six boiled eggs
and
a tin of tuna
for me tea
most tasty
guessing i won’t
shite for a fortnight
Watching that game very much reminds me of watching Arsenal of few years back.
Sakhtar is absolutely dominant in second half, tries to walk the ball in to net and has absolutely no plan B. Plzen scored two lucky (deflected) goals in first half and now hanging by tooth and nail.
Dnipro manager Juande Ramos to get his revenge on Spurs tonight?
No such thing, 8ball. Dnipro hit the self-destruct button and Spurs are through. But that means they will play Benfica on the Thursday before we visit WHL which will pretty much remove the advantage they would otherwise have had as we are playing Bayern away on the Wednesday. Would have been even better if Spurs had been playing Benfica away but it’s a lot better than them having the whole week off being able to focus on nothing but the derby.
Spot on Lars;my sentiments exactly. I would also have them bruised in that game against Benfica after giving their all. They would then be almost comatose and practically give us the three points at the lane due to being brain dead from exhaustion. This would in turn start a downward spiral that would see them gain 2 points from their remaining league fixtures. That would do me just fine.
Great article Zico. A very good read.
The evolution of the football fan has always been an interesting topic. It does make me smile when I hear those who are really local moaning about others not being “real” fans. I also do not buy the cost of tickets as a major excuse for not attending games. Of course ticket prices can be high. It is often a talking point on here. But the extortionate prices charged for a Cat A game are somewhat offset by those charged for a Cat C game or League Cup fixtures. I often wonder where all of these “locals” were when Highbury was affordable but the ground was only two thirds full? I don’t remember too many moaning then????
The advent of Sky and the internet have brought The Arsenal into the homes and bars of many throughout the planet. I am a London lad born and bred. I am fortunate enough to live only and hour away from The Grove. I am fortunate enough to own a season ticket. I class it amongst my most treasured possessions. I go to games week in week out, come rain or shine. I take time off work and arrange my whole calendar around fixtures. Does that make me more of a fan than someone who lives thousands of miles away who has never been fortunate enough to attend a game? Of course it doesn’t. Those who are regularly up at ridiculous hours are just as passionate. Those who I have had the great pleasure of meeting that travel form all four corners of the globe are equally as passionate. One thing this bar should have taught us all is that Arsenal fans are one big family. Something that I think we should all be proud of.
To be a true supporter involves an unbridled love and passion. It matters not a jot where on this planet that occurs or at what stage in your life it happens. When it happens it’s there for life. I have explained to Mrs T more than once over the years that I was in love with Arsenal long before I even knew of her existence. She gets it now. If you support a club you support a club. You can’t change that, and that is why AG you do not give your season ticket up just because things don’t go the way you think they should. Asking questions from time to time demonstrates your love and passion, it does make you disloyal or dispassionate. I would suggest that none of us ever lose sight of that and we all look back and realise how fortunate we really are.
Some top posts above and some great reads. Zico, once again thanks for a great post. A dodgy sweaty you may be but I know your heart is in North London.
To the tune of that shit Wham song……
Keep it up Yaya Sanogo
Let’s hope your better than that cunt from Togo.
What Steve T said @238
Watched the Schalke RM match. Not impressed with Draxler. If we’re serious about him I hope he was having a really off day. Otoh Ronaldo had a blinder, and Bale was doing quite good TR7 impressions. More like ritual slaughter than a football match.
Öskar
(Broad Irish accent required)
Irish colleen goes to her mother and confesses, “I’m banjaxed, ma … I was in the numbs las’ night acting the maggot wit da boyos and now I’m sure I’m up ‘a duff”. Mother looks at her closely, and asks “Go way outta that! An eejit you are right enough, but are you sure it’s yours?”
Öskar
Steve T knows!
Solid: This is the Spuds we are talking about. They start out comatose so the only benefit of them playing on Thursday is that they might be a bit more tired. On the other hand, they can take 3 months off and spend 100 mil, and they will still be shite.
Good stuff @238 Steve T
Heh Steve T, you got the dodgy bit right. 🙂
Great post mate, see you next week I hope.
Nice one Steve T.
Hi All
Rivalries are part and parcel of football where ever you go. Its not our fault the Spud`s are so shit and finish below us every year ! yet you would think they invented the game if you come across any of them. Sad sad sad fans.
A newer rivalry has emerged in Chelski in the last 15 years, normally a club who yoyo`d so much between leagues it would make your head spin.
However Chelski supporters are starting to make Spud fans seem reasonable. Every chelski fan has supported them all their life and been a season ticket holder from birth, ahem *Bullshit*
While I explain that they have been a chelski fan circa 2002/2003 which then the all my life fan blah blah blah starts, season ticket holder blah blah blah. I was born with a chelsea top on blah blah blah.
This is a club who sold their pitch in little sigments because a fan base of 6,000 at home games wasnt enough to support the club. So taking into consideration all the season ticket holders just brought there ticket not to show up seems unlikely.
Now to the point, everyone on this blog has sat through some terrible football some serious heartbreak and alot of dire times at Highbury. Did we still keep coming ? Did we still put are names down for season tickets in the little hope one would become available ?
The answer is yes ! Yes we did. Thats why we are The Arsenal and proud to follow them in good and bad times as they are our club. What else can we say.
Cheers
What else can we say?
How about Fuck off, Chelsea?
Say it loud, say it proud……
Say it often.
That would have been a better ending Zico.
Let me just add, fantatic write up sir.
Fantastic indeed, as will be the Orcs preview later today, another guest piece.
Thanks fellas. Really appreciated right now.
Thanks A71 (again) 😉
Cheers people above.
Let me tell you about something that happened in my house this morning that for me tells you all about being a supporter and the inevitable rivalries that brings.
At approximately 7.30am UK time I enter my 10 year old sons bedroom to wake him for the days learning that lies ahead. He starts to enter the world of the living from his deep slumber. As I open the curtains just a fraction he stretches and responds politely to my “good morning.” The next words out of his mouth as he continues to stretch are “dad, did Tottenham lose?” I said “no, they won 3-1.” All sorts or tuts, grunts and groans follow as he seeks to identify the correct vocal response to such a disappointment, just as he ambles off to the bathroom for those early morning ablutions.
The evolution of the modern day fan. You can’t beat it.
Heh, nice one, again.
Brilliant, Steve T. That made me smile.
Similar incident (sort of), I have 3 colleagues in the office who are Gooners, there was a game last week where the Sp*rs lost and I for one definitely did NOT bother to watch it.
One looked up the scores and he went “dude, Tottnumb lost last night.”
All 4 of us laughed the same ‘hurhur what c*nts’ laugh.
Something that goes like “Hurhurhehhmmph”.
Tell me that doesn’t sound familiar.
Steve T
Love it !
Arsgonian (somewhere above).
You posted that you’ve never been to a live game and you’re saving yourself for a trip to THOF. Whilst highly comendable and I get where you’re coming from, I’d strongly advise you bust your cherry sooner rather then later. The MLS may not be the PL, but a day out at the Seattle Sounders doesn’t sound like the worst thing in the world.
I’ll only ever have one team, and that is the Arsenal, however, I go to a live game every now and again over here and if I’m abroad and I get the chance I go there too, every country, every league, every stadium even, has it’s own special atmosphere and customs, from having a beer and a ciggy in the stands in Holland, to standing and jumping with a massive crowd in Germany, to organised madness in Italy, to tapas and chorizo in Spain, it’s all so varied and strange, yet at the same time, all so familiar.
I enjoy watching the footy on the box but it’s nowhere near as good as seeing it live. There is just so much more to see then what the tv coverage, no matter how good it has become, can afford you. Plus the whole tribalism of it, the noise, the brotherhood, everything acually.
Watching a game live will also highten your understanding of tactics and movement, you’ll gain a lot more insight into the game you love which will also assist you in your blog writing (this is by no means a dig at your blog).
So, go on, do it. Have a go somewhere else, at the very least it will make you appreciate the pure briliance of the Emirates even more.
Steve, there is little doubt that Ben has his priorities in perfect order – footie results first, then get on with the day 🙂
Steve T,
I was just enjoying a hard earned lunch when I found myself reading about your grunting and early morning ablutions ………
Other than that you seem to be doing a fine job with the young man. 😉
A treat from the inimitable Lars >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>