• Home
  • About
  • Behind The Arse
  • PopuHolics

Goonerholic

Eat, sleep, breathe, drink, Arsenal

Feed on
Posts
Comments

Ode To Joy

Aug 12th, 2015 by 'holic

For weeks we were treated to fillet, the pre-season dining was fine,

Three weekends, three trophies, we did it, and toasted the Gunners with wine.

 

So on Sunday the train journey eastwards, was filled with the growing belief,

That The Arsenal were destined for trophies, a title perchance, oh relief.

 

Now the first day of any new season is laced with surprises and gloom,

You hope it’s not us, but it was, to the glee of purveyors of doom.

 

“That Cech, told you so, what a stinker, and don’t start me off on Giroud”,

One by one our faults are transmitted, “that Coquelin, he’s rubbish too”.

 

But of course we have seen this so often, and more often than not we bounce back,

Though of course we could do with some cover, and a goalscorer in the attack.

 

But the squad we have now should be able, though they had a bad day it is true,

To get some reward at the Palace, and take points off the red scousers too.

 

Bank holiday, off to the Geordies, play hard, and battle, in we’ll dig,

Then the chaos will hit three days later, deadline day, and a chance to spend big.

 

Yes of course it could be so much better, there’s no doubt that the start was not great,

Yet there’s much to look forward to also, and in May we might just celebrate.

 

*I’ll get me coat…*

Posted in tongue in cheek | 147 Drinks

147 Responses to “Ode To Joy”

  1. on 12 Aug 2015 at 9:38 pm1scruzgooner

    the apparition of these doomers in the crowd
    petals on a wet, black bin liner.

    *hands the guv his coat, and a large pimms no. 1 cup, and a safari hat.*

  2. on 12 Aug 2015 at 9:40 pm2Fin

    Fine poetry ‘holic.

  3. on 12 Aug 2015 at 9:45 pm3Goonerholic

    Thanks scruz.

    Great to see you Fin. Hope all is ok, other than your piss-poor judgement on what constitutes poetry, of course!

    πŸ™‚

  4. on 12 Aug 2015 at 9:54 pm4NorCal

    Cheers All. I still love this place.
    A drink on the bar for all who “know” me and those who don’t.
    New season. 37 more league games to go. I’m still optimistic. We still have a chance at 111 more points we won’t win them all but at the start of each game we have a better than usual chance of winning the maximum.
    Chins held high all. We are The Arsenal.

  5. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:07 pm5Goonerholic

    I know you lots NorCal, so I have just pulled the cork out with my teeth and added the bottle to your tab! πŸ˜‰

  6. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:11 pm6Pangloss

    It is customary for me to say, at about this point in each bar, something like: “Fine piece Guv’nor”.

    COYG

    *holds chins high*

  7. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:21 pm7Goonerholic

    Chins πŸ™‚

    Reminds me of an old favourite joke.

    “Les, you have a bit of gravy on your chin.”

    …

    “Not that one!”

  8. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:23 pm8Trev

    Heh! Not bad for a load of old bollocks ! πŸ˜‰

    Interesting print format – each line, I believe, disguising two lots of iambic pentameter.

    As one does, of course ! πŸ˜‰

  9. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:44 pm9NorCal

    Drinking like Dr Z, Holic?
    Beware of the Pirates when you drink straight from the flagon.

  10. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:47 pm10Trev

    Can’t resist a poetic response, Holic – (in your own rhythm, sir)

    If we don’t get three points at the Palace,
    There’ll be calls for the manager’s head,
    If he can’t score three goals at the Palace,
    It could mean that Giroud’s career’s dead.

    If Cech let’s in three goals at the Palace,
    He could find himself out in the cold,
    Our number three-three at the Palace,
    Replaced by Ospina, I’m told. ( not really !)

    If we can score three goals at the Palace,
    We’ll find ourselves back in the hunt,
    With joy for our own Arsene Wenger,
    But not Alan Pardew, the cunt.

    *pass me my coat while you’re there*

  11. on 12 Aug 2015 at 10:52 pm11Goonerholic

    πŸ™‚

    Brilliant Trev.

  12. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:18 pm12Uplympian

    What a load of laureates, the lot of yer. Great stuff….in keeping with this bar. Cheers one & all.

  13. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:20 pm13Cynic

    I had an iambic pentameter once, but I swapped it for a bag of marbles and some conkers.

  14. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:22 pm14Trev

    Cheers, H.

    Inspired by your own great stuff. πŸ˜‰

  15. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:27 pm15Uplympian

    Norcal..good to hear from you…hope things are well in Mt Shasta. Thanks for the drink….please send your credit card details to the guv’na at the Tollie…Lars will no doubt fill you in with the procedure. πŸ™‚

  16. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:41 pm16NorCal

    Cheers Uply!
    Hope I can buy you a real drink sometime this season.
    Other than the usual fires this time of year, all is well here. Hope the same is with you.

  17. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:47 pm17Trev

    Yes, Uply,

    I hope you only have the usual fires too. πŸ˜‰

  18. on 12 Aug 2015 at 11:55 pm18Uplympian

    Norcal…is that smoke from the trees or “Northern Californian Finest” you are referring to πŸ˜‰
    Keep the bar informed when you are coming over…..there’s plenty who will avail themselves of your drink offer. If it co-insides with visit from
    Dr Z, better double your spend budget as a minimum.

  19. on 13 Aug 2015 at 12:12 am19Uplympian

    Trev..heh πŸ™‚

  20. on 13 Aug 2015 at 12:57 am20bathgooner

    Poetry?

    Who’da thunk it?

  21. on 13 Aug 2015 at 1:22 am21can't be arsed

    champion stuff ‘holic
    champion
    πŸ™‚
    .
    .
    UP THE ARSENAL !

  22. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:10 am22behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    **mentally attempts to convert the high quality of our pre-season dining into similar in-season dining experience.**

  23. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:18 am23behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Will the Eva Carneiro episode finally lead to Mourinho”s hubris catching up with him?

    Like …

    Chelsea having a disastrous injury plagued season, say?

  24. on 13 Aug 2015 at 6:57 am24can't be arsed

    23
    my ideal would be a run of performances
    so unbelievably shite
    that even the pompous one
    would struggle to blame them
    on someone or something else
    πŸ™‚

  25. on 13 Aug 2015 at 7:12 am25North Bank Ned

    There would still be another 7.125 billion people in the world to blame before himself, cba.

    As bath said @20, poetry? πŸ™‚

  26. on 13 Aug 2015 at 9:09 am26can't be arsed

    would be fun waiting on the
    “the dog ate my teamsheet” one though, ned
    πŸ™‚

  27. on 13 Aug 2015 at 10:43 am27King GT

    Venezuelan ESPN Deportes presenter Jeinny Lizarazo, has posted a video stating that, if her information that we will Sign Karim Benzema during this transfer window is not true, she has agreed to be punished!

    Now looking at her rationally, I think I will take her up on her challenge with both hands.

    πŸ˜‰

  28. on 13 Aug 2015 at 12:36 pm28Cynic

    I see we’ve launched a new cup kit. Cup being marketing talk for shit.

  29. on 13 Aug 2015 at 1:53 pm29Cynic

    Jeremy Corbyn, Arsenal fan.

    http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/jeremy-corbyn-signed-motion-saying-arsenal-is-the-best-football-team-in-the-world-10452120.html

  30. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:08 pm30Trev

    @27 –

    Jeinny Maria Lizarazo Rodriguez was born on January 13th, 1983.

    Here is what Wikipaedia has to say about her –

    “Lizarazo was discovered in Miami Beach by a TV producer who invited her to participate in a contest on the popular Telemundo network program Descontrol. She won and was chosen to be a co-host of the weekly dance music show.

    Lizarazo has appeared in various novelas since 2010, notably the Telemundo network’s Perro Amor, ΒΏDΓ³nde EstΓ‘ Elisa?, Alguien Te Mira, and La Casa de al Lado; and the Venevision-Univision co-production, El TalismΓ‘n. She is frequently a co-host, presenter, and comic actress on variety shows and talk shows, including Nitido, El Gordo y la Flaca, and Este Noche Tu Night con Felipe Viel.

    In addition to modeling, Lizarazo studied at the University of Miami Journalism – Media studies (Radio and TV), including acting Meisner technique under actor-teacher SebastiΓ‘n Ligarde. She also studied under Academy Award-nominated actress Adriana Barraza.”

    Clearly the definitive source for information on Karim Benzema.

    Carry on ……….

    In March 2014, Lizarazo began appearing as a Miami correspondent on the Spanish TV sports program El Chiringuito de Jugones.[1][2][3]

  31. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:10 pm31Trev

    Sorry, the last bit escaped the quote marks – but why wouldn’t it. πŸ˜‰

  32. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:18 pm32King GT

    @ 30 – All the more reason for me to take her up on her challenge!

    πŸ˜†

  33. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:19 pm33King GT

    I see Alexis is ready for Sunday’s game! πŸ™‚

    Rest up Eagles! πŸ˜†

  34. on 13 Aug 2015 at 2:23 pm34King GT

    See for yourself!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_BYpjsQguw

  35. on 13 Aug 2015 at 3:07 pm35Thundertinygooner

    What about a day when every contribution has to be in verse? It would elevate us even further above the Grove and Online Gooner
    Plb

  36. on 13 Aug 2015 at 3:33 pm36Pangloss

    Drinking in verse?
    Can’t see it myself
    The standard now bad
    Would surely get worse.

    *Searches for coat*

  37. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:12 pm37Trev

    TTG,

    It might, it might,
    But it could be shite !

  38. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:19 pm38behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Speaking purely as an uninvolved observer I don’t see why anybody might think Eva Carneiro would want to “regain Mourinho’s trust” after he humiliated her in public when she did nothing wrong. There are lots of better jobs out there for someone with her qualifications.

    http://www.bbc.com/sport/0/football/33906491

  39. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:40 pm39North Bank Ned

    KingGT@27, apparently Jeinny Lizarazo’s idea of punishment is to have Arsenal fans pour buckets of cold water over her.

    Each to their own, I suppose.

  40. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:44 pm40Trev

    Agreed, bt8.

    She should resign completely as of now on the grounds that she is unable to fulfill her duty of care to the players because she is not allowed near the pitch.

    Failing to provide that duty of care would leave her in breach of the conditions of employment as laid out by the Football Medical Association, rendering her unable to do her job.

    Of course, the better reason for walking straight out the door would be to leave Mourinho and Chelsea right in the shit.

    Where they belong.

  41. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:46 pm41North Bank Ned

    Every drink a rhyme?
    Where’d we find the time
    To moan and groan
    Let alone
    To persist with a self-assist?

    *No really, I don’t need that many coats…*

  42. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:46 pm42Trev

    Ned,

    That could make her even more attractive if you, er, catch my drift.

    πŸ˜‰

  43. on 13 Aug 2015 at 4:53 pm43North Bank Ned

    I suppose you could see her point, Trev. ?

    And what is it about Venezuelan TV presenters and football?

    http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/row-zed/naked-news-venezuelan-tv-presenter-5898592

  44. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:16 pm44Cynic

    What about a day when every contribution has to be in verse?

    No way
    JosΓ©

  45. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:23 pm45Cynic

    Venezuela gets her, we get Fletch and Sav.

    Fucksticks.

  46. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:24 pm46scruzgooner

    or haiku:

    there is nothing in
    the bar that intimates how
    soon jose will fail.

    fall sun, green grass is
    slick underfoot. only
    drinking remains now.

  47. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:26 pm47behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Time to return to the British poetic forms, scruz? :0

  48. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:44 pm48North Bank Ned

    Along the lines, bt8b, of

    There was a young doc from Gibraltar,

  49. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:46 pm49King GT

    πŸ˜†

  50. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:51 pm50scruzgooner

    a little nash, maybe?

    the scum

    the scum, if i’m not askant;
    supply us humor, laughs, and chant.
    let others say they’re skill endowed–
    i call it stupid, they’re in our shadow.

  51. on 13 Aug 2015 at 5:59 pm51Lars

    ttg, we have had a whole drinks session with pretty much every drink written in verse. Think it was started by the main post also being written in some form of verse. Can’t remember when or what it was about, but it was a few years ago.

  52. on 13 Aug 2015 at 6:47 pm52Trev

    Ok Ned, let’s try yours,

    There was a young Doc from Gibraltar,
    In the papers you’ll probably have caught ‘er,
    ‘Cos Mourinho the c*nt
    Has given her the shunt
    For running on when she didn’t oughta.

    πŸ˜‰

  53. on 13 Aug 2015 at 6:55 pm53scruzgooner

    waheeyyy, trev!

  54. on 13 Aug 2015 at 7:42 pm54Trev

    Our goalie is not in his prime,
    Thirty-three is too far down the line.
    I just have a hunch
    That ridiculous punch
    Has not been seen for the last time.

  55. on 13 Aug 2015 at 7:53 pm55Trev

    I prefer David Ospina
    His handling is just so much cleaner,
    That number thirteen’s
    A shot stopping machine,
    I think he should be a first teamer.

  56. on 13 Aug 2015 at 7:54 pm56Trev

    *zips up coat and leaves*

  57. on 13 Aug 2015 at 8:19 pm57Silly Second Yella

    Lotta singin’ after we lost.

    What we’ll happen when we win?

    Just tell me the ale you’re on and I’ll switch, immediately.

  58. on 13 Aug 2015 at 8:28 pm58behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Ospina scans better than Cech, that’s for sure. πŸ™‚

  59. on 13 Aug 2015 at 8:31 pm59Trev

    Ospina IS better than Cech, that’s for sure too. πŸ˜‰

  60. on 13 Aug 2015 at 8:43 pm60North Bank Ned

    Trev@52: top notch.

    There was a young Doc from Gibraltar,
    On medical skills you can’t fault her
    With a hide like a rhino
    To tweet off Mourinho
    Even JT wouldn’t assault her

  61. on 13 Aug 2015 at 9:53 pm61Uplympian

    POETS day used to be on Fridays in my day…..just saying πŸ˜‰

  62. on 13 Aug 2015 at 10:35 pm62King GT

    Ned @ 39 That’s what she thinks! πŸ˜†

  63. on 13 Aug 2015 at 10:40 pm63North Bank Ned

    Carpe diem, Uply. And at our age, that is probably any day you can get…

    KingGT@62: In your dreams…

  64. on 13 Aug 2015 at 11:06 pm64Homer

    Ned, nice one!

  65. on 13 Aug 2015 at 11:21 pm65Goonerholic

    Nutters.

    Yes, you! πŸ™‚

  66. on 13 Aug 2015 at 11:38 pm66Uplympian

    Life long support of The Arsenal may have something to do with it Holic πŸ™‚
    Now back to the PGA golf….great watching.

  67. on 13 Aug 2015 at 11:50 pm67King GT

    ned@ 62 Speak for yourself mate! πŸ˜†

  68. on 14 Aug 2015 at 12:14 am68scruzgooner

    and another on the dock:

    there was a young doc from gibraltar,
    one whom moaningho couldn’t halter,
    she was doing the job
    that jose would then rob,
    when he found that he couldn’t just halt ‘er.

  69. on 14 Aug 2015 at 12:31 am69Goonerholic

    Agreed on the golf, Uppy. Some course that. I suspect i would need 2 dozen balls to complete a round there. πŸ™‚

  70. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:06 am70Uplympian

    Heh ‘holic…think I would still be looking for my balls in the rough ( ooh er missus). Good to see a course where every shot had danger written holic.
    Ned 63 . You’re correct – It’s hard enough remembering what day it is nowadays πŸ˜‰

  71. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:09 am71Uplympian

    Scruz…here’s one back at yer.

    There was a doc from Gibraltar
    Looks wise you couldn’t fault her
    What makes me sad
    It’s just too bad
    She’s young enough to be my daughter

  72. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:11 am72Uplympian

    @ 70. Should be a comma between danger and holic. Hope that’s not even more confusing. Time for sleep me thinks.

  73. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:30 am73Lord Byron

    The lass from Venezuela

    Knows all about Benzaimer

    She met him once

    They shared some lunch

    And played her vuvuzela.

  74. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:48 am74ecg - the artist formally known as ECG

    Y’all too sophisticated for me. I like to keep it simple:

    Jose Mourinho is dickless
    Jose Mourinho is dickless
    Terry is a cunt
    Terry is a cunt
    Jose Mourinho is dickless

  75. on 14 Aug 2015 at 4:15 am75Γ–skar the dog

    Some Goonerholics
    Write doggerel bollix
    With rhymes perverse
    And scanning worse
    But droller still
    Is their football skill
    With weekly analyses
    Riddled with fallacies
    These mediocrities
    Who think they’re Socrates

    Γ–skar

  76. on 14 Aug 2015 at 5:55 am76scruzgooner

    uply, being young at heart can get you a long way… πŸ™‚

  77. on 14 Aug 2015 at 6:06 am77Γ–skar the dog

    There once was a winger called Eden
    Lying flat on the ground barely breathin’
    When up from the bench
    Jumped a sexy young wench
    With hands like a porn star from Sweden

    Γ–skar

  78. on 14 Aug 2015 at 6:51 am78North Bank Ned

    Uply@70: I can remember this morning as if it was yesterday…

    And one for Otd that seems appropriate for this set of drinks:

    http://www.philosophyfootball.com/product_images/pimg536956f573f33_front

  79. on 14 Aug 2015 at 7:36 am79Γ–skar the dog

    Wrong Socrates, Ned! Although yours knew a thing or two about doctoring. Even if Women, Cigarettes and Beer were his favourite vices. They may be mine too, if you substitute wine and cognac for cigarettes and beer. We agree on women anyway.

    Some advice for Jose. Or did he perhaps write this? http://www.4dfoot.com/2013/10/07/blaming-the-world-for-defeat-ten-tips-for-aspiring-managers/

    Γ–skar

  80. on 14 Aug 2015 at 8:21 am80King GT

    Good morning, good morning
    Wipe your eyes, stop yawning
    I agreed the mood is currently somber
    Until the teams victories begin spawning

    The aftermath of Sunday was not great
    There was moaning, groaning and self imposed hate
    There was reason and optimism ahead of the teams next date
    Well only two more sleeps now, not long to wait

    Btw: no news, is hopefully good news πŸ˜‰

    It’s Friday godamn it! Press conference & training photo day, the return of Alexis Sanchez day

    * okay, I’ll run for cover*

    πŸ™‚

  81. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:14 am81Goonerholic

    Morning lollygaggers, I hope the weather is better where you are than here.

  82. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:32 am82can't be arsed

    wine and cognac oskar ?
    so ye ain’t half a bitter man

  83. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:37 am83can't be arsed

    howdy ‘holic
    howdy ‘holics

    πŸ™‚

    (pishing down here ‘hol)

  84. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:56 am84King GT

    Great story:

    http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/20150813/wenger-the-story-of-the-vieira-signing

  85. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:59 am85King GT

    August 14, pre-Crystal Palace

    ** TEAM NEWS: Bellerin available for Palace

    ** Wenger – Defeat is not a blessing

    ** Boss – We are cautious with Jack

    ** ‘How you respond makes your season’

  86. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:35 am86Cynic

    ** β€˜Coughs and sneezes spread diseases’

    ** β€˜Michael Aspel makes your morning’

    ** β€˜The sun’ll come out tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar…’

    ** β€˜Watch out, watch out, there’s a Humphrey about’

  87. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:38 am87Cynic

    ** β€˜Jose Mourinho? I’ll shit him’

    Press conference ends.

  88. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:50 am88Goonerholic

    Good soundbites, Cynic.

    Sorry to hear that cba, but there is a reason for that Emerald Isle tag πŸ™‚

  89. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:56 am89King GT

    ** πŸ™‚

    ** πŸ˜†

  90. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:18 am90Cynic

    With soundbite skillz like those I should be leader of the Labour party

  91. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:19 am91TTG

    It may be a pathetic fallacy
    But I’m starting to feel all Palacey
    Three points for a win
    Will bring back my grin
    And stop me from feeling so Gallasy

    Coat already ordered
    Application for Poet Laureate ripped up

  92. on 14 Aug 2015 at 12:04 pm92Uplympian

    Quite correct TTG….it’s nowhere near bad enough for that job πŸ˜‰

  93. on 14 Aug 2015 at 12:20 pm93Uplympian

    As we’re heading towards the ton, this will painfully move us on the way!

    The team is ready for the game at Palace
    They will need to show a lot more malice
    Le Coq is there to put it about
    Flim Flam will no doubt point & shout
    And Pardieu of course is a massive phallus

    Now where’s that application form πŸ˜‰

  94. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:37 pm94can't be arsed

    90 cynic
    blogs has more twitter followers
    than corbyn and burnham combined
    perhaps time for an arsenal government ?
    get yer hat in the ring
    πŸ˜‰

  95. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:43 pm95Vinay

    Let me try to i may just get away with it in between such lovely poetry.

    He just ceched in give him sometime,
    He is 10-12 points banker anytime.
    The cheerleaders are awesome at selhurst park,
    Now get 3 points before it gets dark,
    Aaron needs to keep it simple and short,
    Le Coq needs to remember whom to thwart,
    Alexis Sanchez baby Alexis Sanchez ohhhho,
    Santi its time to ignite and let it go.
    Per should stop waving his hand and stand,
    Mesut should assist more with his magic wand.
    We are The Arsenal by far the best in the world,
    Time to win and let the title challenge unfold.

    Well thats my 2 cents.

  96. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:55 pm96behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Brevity and levity.
    My aspiration.

  97. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:57 pm97behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Uply @93 almost contending with Dr. T quality. πŸ™‚

  98. on 14 Aug 2015 at 1:58 pm98behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    … and TTG @91. Palace is a good candidate for rhyming partners, it turns out …

  99. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:04 pm99North Bank Ned

    Speculative cross.

  100. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:04 pm100King GT

    Up the wing with ferocious pace, cuts inside and makes a quick inside pass…

  101. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:06 pm101King GT

    …after receiving the speculative cross from ned, of course πŸ˜‰

    inside pass turned into a corner shot, in fact!

    ;lol:

    Thanks Ned!

  102. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:07 pm102King GT

    (I meant πŸ˜† )

  103. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:09 pm103North Bank Ned

    Well in for the ton, KGT. Keeper probably had his head buried in The Complete Anthology of Modern Poetry.

  104. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:11 pm104can't be arsed

    kGT
    ye panached the fuck outta that
    πŸ˜‰
    .
    8ball 96 πŸ™‚

  105. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:13 pm105King GT

    That goal was dedicated to the return of Alexis!

    πŸ˜†

    Here’s to a hard graft match this Sunday too! πŸ˜‰

  106. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:35 pm106Uplympian

    Bt8b. Thanks, I think πŸ˜‰

    Well in for the ton K GT

    Ned 103. Fanciful thinking there….footballers picking up a book πŸ˜‰

  107. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:41 pm107North Bank Ned

    It must have been the colouring book edition, Uply.

  108. on 14 Aug 2015 at 2:44 pm108can't be arsed

    things can be simple

    yesterday about 4
    wee calf dragged out
    the business end of it’s mother
    head held in a birthing do-dad
    arse walloped on the yard
    quick bucket of water round it’s chops
    15 mins later
    it traipsed across the field with it’s mammy
    admittedly with all the grace of peter crouch ice-skating
    but traipsed it did
    rained all night
    the wee fecker just sauntered past me
    not a bother

    just wait to sunday
    piece o piss
    πŸ˜‰

  109. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:05 pm109can't be arsed

    mind you
    it did leave a big red mess
    in the yard
    and the dogs fought
    to lick up the mush

    so pay no heed to me

    .

  110. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:06 pm110behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    Can’t pass over Oskar’s contribution @77. πŸ™‚

  111. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:13 pm111Uplympian

    Ned….heh. Expect most of them get their agent to help them out with it πŸ˜‰

    Cba..that’s a grand story….Mother Nature is a marvellous thing.

  112. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:18 pm112King GT

    Cheers guys!

    I’m amped about Sunday! Hope the lads are too. Will literally be a ‘dog fight’. πŸ˜‰

  113. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:21 pm113can't be arsed

    8ball
    his 75
    last two lines
    should have been “us”
    then “we’re”

    no ?

    less maureeny ?

  114. on 14 Aug 2015 at 3:30 pm114can't be arsed

    howdy Up
    never ceases to amaze me πŸ™‚
    .

    hope yer well , chief

  115. on 14 Aug 2015 at 4:07 pm115Uplympian

    cba….alls ok thanks. How are things with you? Stocks ok with the home brew….best use it quickly in case it goes off πŸ˜‰

  116. on 14 Aug 2015 at 4:56 pm116can't be arsed

    Up
    good to hear fella πŸ™‚
    all grand here

    it’s a bugger keeping on top of homebrew
    ye can’t forget stock control
    no siree !

    much like those ronnie drew bearded youngfellas
    ye see beatin’ about the place
    inked up to their eyeballs
    short back n sides too
    who
    were it not for their nail varnish drying
    look like they could “wrastle an ozarks barrrr”

    ye have to plan years ahead
    to get to the well trodden path

    .
    .
    what was i on about πŸ™‚
    .
    yup
    consume
    replenish
    tricky
    .
    i store some bottles for ages
    a particularly nice imperial stout
    was laid away for a year or more

    .
    those for quick consumption
    have the helpful side effect
    of
    forgetting i’ve put some in storage
    .
    anyhoo
    .
    .
    waffling away as usual

    (stay safe at the baseball bat bowls buddy)
    πŸ˜‰

  117. on 14 Aug 2015 at 7:41 pm117Silly Second Yella

    B & B

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avyruPEzU1o

  118. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:02 pm118can't be arsed

    that tune
    nope
    not fer me
    no

    not unlike the homesick paddy
    who never left ireland
    singing songs of dear old eireann
    in a touraloura accent

    what is the point ?

    any angry people i know
    just are
    for better or worse
    they don’t pause to work out the chords

    anyhoo

    i’ve talked enough shite today πŸ™‚

  119. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:04 pm119can't be arsed

    mind you
    wouldn’t take long
    to work out those chords
    πŸ˜‰

  120. on 14 Aug 2015 at 9:48 pm120Goonerholic

    You on your own again, cba?

    Downright rude. I apologise. What can I pour you. I have whiskey, and I have whisky, and I have…

    Oh, that would appear to be it. πŸ™

  121. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:02 pm121scruzgooner

    ‘holic, i think i see a bottle of uisge beatha hanging around the back bar, too. and arseblog must have been through, ’cause all the bourbon is empty…

  122. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:55 pm122bt8

    G’night cba. πŸ™‚

  123. on 14 Aug 2015 at 10:56 pm123bt8

    G’night ‘holic too.

  124. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:49 pm124can't be arsed

    ‘hol
    the beauty of yer stewardship here
    despite yer name being above the door
    is anyone who takes a jar here
    is on the

    “the guvs just nipped out”
    .
    “no bother”
    “sign for it here then ,mate” list
    .
    .
    .
    happy to do a singular swally here
    just happy its open πŸ™‚
    and i’m not barred
    πŸ™‚

    .
    .
    though
    go ahead
    bar me
    go on
    try it
    I KNOW PEOPL…………….

  125. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:53 pm125Joe

    There are only a few shrines in my temple, but this is the only one I would kneel in front of:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SDhUAVKNVg

  126. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:54 pm126North Bank Ned

    Come the day you’re barred from this bar, cba, will be the day hell freezes over or John Terry becomes a tolerable human being. So you’ve got plenty of time…

  127. on 14 Aug 2015 at 11:55 pm127North Bank Ned

    Astral Weeks, Joe. The true catechism.

  128. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:05 am128North Bank Ned

    https://youtu.be/4ech6pZoBJ4

  129. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:14 am129can't be arsed

    can’t feckin stand van the wee baldy man
    sorry
    similarly similar over the top emotional emotions
    wrenched over the same whaaaa whaaa range

    i appreciate i might be missing something
    but in true oskar stylee
    my head says
    highly bloody unlikely

    sorry oskar
    πŸ˜‰

  130. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:16 am130Joe

    The only record in my short lifetime Ned, where on first hearing, I automatically thought it was a complete masterpiece. And it remains to be the record of my lifetime.

    He recorded that, astonishingly, when he was 23. The sad thing believe it or not, is that Morrison doesn’t own it..! If I remember correctly from some interview he gave, the rights are actually owned by some record company…!!

    But what a piece of music!

  131. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:34 am131can't be arsed

    saw him twice

    once in a shop in belfast

    once after booker T and the MGs
    and neil young

  132. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:41 am132Joe

    Saw Van in Cork, CBA, a few weeks ago.
    Another tick on the bucket list completed..!
    Waits is the only one remaining for me.
    That and old big ears….!
    πŸ™‚

  133. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:59 am133can't be arsed

    seeing people ye love in concert joe
    hard to whack
    yes indeedy πŸ™‚

  134. on 15 Aug 2015 at 1:00 am134can't be arsed

    big ears is waiting in the wings
    oh yes
    πŸ™‚

  135. on 15 Aug 2015 at 1:19 am135North Bank Ned

    Waits as in pipers or as in Tom, Joe?

  136. on 15 Aug 2015 at 1:41 am136Γ–skar the dog

    My preference is for wine and cognac, cba, but I’ll drink a half (or better still a pint) of bitter with you … or a pint of whiskey if ye prefer. Well, no probs with the beer, but maybe not the latter nowadays.

    Once upon a time I used to say ‘I don’t drink any more’ … followed by ‘I don’t drink any less either’ (joke). But it’s no longer true. That second bottle of whisk(e)y shared with a mate would have to be drunk in my sleep now. πŸ™

    Γ–skar

  137. on 15 Aug 2015 at 7:09 am137Joe

    Waits as in Tom, indeed Ned. I’ll probably have to travel to see him eventually.

  138. on 15 Aug 2015 at 7:48 am138behind the 8 ball but gunning for glory

    http://www.arsenal.com/match/report/1415/post/under-21/u21s-arsenal-1-0-fulham-match-report

  139. on 15 Aug 2015 at 9:46 am139North Bank Ned

    Joe: I once saw not Tom Waits but Tom Petty or it may have been Nils Lofgren flip a somersault off a trampoline while playing his guitar. Double bill with Blondie, if I recall. Seems a long time ago. Well, it was a long time ago…

  140. on 15 Aug 2015 at 11:10 am140Dapper DanC

    Nice one ‘h!

    A battling three points early on at Selhurst Park (3 – 1 to the Arse) = Doom and Gloomers piped-up for the week. Cech!

    Rush back to the local for a Magners-on-ice and to catch the 2nd half of the artificially-doped challengers playing out a physical and dirty scoreless draw with highlights being several month long injuries to Hazard, Silva, Fabregas and Toure. Cech!

    Up the Arse all day and night! COYBG!

  141. on 15 Aug 2015 at 11:16 am141Dapper DanC

    Now that’s poetry cba, mae Celtic bard! 😎

  142. on 15 Aug 2015 at 12:49 pm142Goonerholic

    Preview this evening, all.

    Have a great Saturday.

  143. on 15 Aug 2015 at 1:02 pm143Trev

    Holic,

    In case you were contemplating another poetic piece for the preview –

    The match tomorrow is at the Palace,
    Don’t get it confused with Peter Alliss,
    He does the golf on SS4 ………

  144. on 15 Aug 2015 at 3:12 pm144TTG

    Interesting to see that in , what was apparently an impressive performance by the Under 21s last night, Bielik started at centre back. It will be interesting to watch his progress this season . His partner Pleguezelo is highly rated at the club but had several injuries last season. So don’t expect a CB signing before the window closes. Zelalem scored in a 1-0 win against Fulham

  145. on 15 Aug 2015 at 4:58 pm145BB

    If Cech isn’t who we need.. we may have to recall Jenkinson!
    100% record!

    πŸ˜‰

  146. on 15 Aug 2015 at 6:49 pm146bt8

    Hoping Petr remembers to Cech in this time.

  147. on 15 Aug 2015 at 7:20 pm147Goonerholic

    The headline is a Palace Pun-chline. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

  • Recent Posts

    • David Faber 1957-2019
    • Xhaka? Emery? What Do You Think?
    • Palace At Home – What Could Go Wrong?
    • Amazingly Spirited Gunners Pull Another Cup Win Out Of The Bag.
    • Guest Post – iBtM Europa League Preview
    • Brief Doesn’t Cover It
  • As featured on NewsNow: Arsenal FC newsArsenal News 24/7
    Arsenal charity of the season The Football Blog Network Gunners blogs Arsenal charity of the season
  • Get Adobe Flash player
  • Categories

    • book reviews (21)
    • comment (530)
    • competitions (37)
    • Guest Tales (65)
    • history (102)
    • match preview (746)
    • match review (830)
    • tongue in cheek (76)
    • Uncategorized (1)
    • video (10)
  • Pages

    • About
    • Behind The Arse
    • PopuHolics
Arsenal News Follow TheGoonerholic on Twitter Android app

Goonerholic © 2023 All Rights Reserved.

MistyLook made free by Web Hosting Bluebook